Inside Out

At the heart of conscious leadership lies deep awareness and coherence between our inner and outer worlds, reflected in our conversations with ourselves and others. It's the foundation upon which we authentically #WalktheTalk, consistently demonstrating integrity, authenticity, and purpose. When our intentions, words, and actions align, we enhance our effectiveness as leaders and inspire those around us to bring their best selves to the table.

Red or Green - How do you choose to respond?

Picture yourself standing at the intersection of two roads: one leads to conflict, low trust and stress, while the other builds trust, relationships, collaboration and partnership. We face this choice each time we engage with ourselves and others in conversation. So let's start with an intriguing question:

What if every conversation led to a different version of our future?

 Every conversational touch-point presents us with a choice. Managing our emotions and a sense of purpose are hallmarks of emotional and spiritual intelligence. These enable us to approach conversations with empathy, compassion, and a genuine desire to understand others' perspectives, fostering environments where everyone feels seen, heard, and valued.

Activate meaningful conversations

Viktor Frankl's profound story as a concentration camp survivor reminds us of the importance of finding meaning in our lives, even in the most challenging circumstances. He said, 

"Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose". The one thing you can't take away from me," he said, "is how I choose to respond to what you do to me." 

Our most basic freedom is to choose our response in any given circumstance. Happiness cannot be pursued; it must ensue. We find meaning in how we language our world. It is here that we have the fleeting moment to answer the question:

How do I choose to respond?

Our current knowledge of neuroscience backs up Frankl's challenge. How often have you been perplexed by a response that was just not logical? When we are triggered, the executive function of our brain is suspended in favour of our fight, flight or freeze response. And we have less than two seconds to choose to respond rather and react. Frankl goes on to say:

"Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom."

The Conscious Journey

Mindful reflection serves as a powerful tool for continuous growth and development. We can navigate conversations with purpose and authenticity by cultivating awareness and setting clear intentions. This reflective practice allows us to observe our communication patterns, emotional triggers, and areas for improvement, ultimately enhancing our ability to connect and lead effectively.

The Reflective Observer

Imagine that you are a wildlife photographer filming a lion hunt. It is the role of the photographer to observe and to record, not to intervene. They don't get involved. They don't try to fix it. They don't stand in judgment. So, imagine that you have this photographer on your shoulder or in the corner of the room watching you respond, communicate and go about your leadership activities. What would they notice? What would they see and hear? Allow this observer in you to observe – to Notice. For the next ten days, take your Objective Observer with you and allow them to accompany you to every meeting and every conversation. In your journal or on your phone, note what you have noticed. Don't try to fix it, just observe.

In this edition of Walk the Talk, I am thrilled to introduce my framework for Conscious Leadership Conversations (CLC), which is grounded in that integral thinking underpins conscious leadership. Conscious leaders recognise that everything we do is interconnected and has an infinite flow throughout our lives and work. 

CLCs are especially effective for agile leaders leading from an emerging future. Suppose we view each conversation as an experiment. In that case, we can move forward and calibrate our following conversation as a building block to shape our future narrative for ourselves and our organisations.

Here are five strategies for intentional conscious leadership conversations with ourselves and others. If you remember from Edition 2 of Walk the Talk, we are either having a conversation with our brains or with other people.

Tap into Your Purpose

Begin your day with a five-minute mindfulness practice, focusing on your breath and contemplating the purpose behind the significant conversations you will have. Consider whether you aim to inspire, resolve conflict, or connect on a human level. What qualities do you aim to embody, and how do you wish to impact those you interact with? Reflect on the future you want to shape through your actions.

Set Your Intentions – your compass for meaningful conversations

Before engaging in any significant conversation:

1. Take a moment to jot down your primary intention.
2. Reflect on how this intention serves your leadership goals and the collective well-being of all involved.
3. Every conversation presents a unique opportunity to create value, share insights, and build relationships.

By setting clear and positive intentions, you can transform the nature of your interactions with others, ensuring they are purposeful and aligned with your leadership goals.

Interrogate Reality – challenge Assumptions, Blind Spots, and Biases

Cultivate a habit of checking in with your emotions and spiritual sources throughout the day. By conducting an inner scan and engaging in feedback, you become more aware of your assumptions, blind spots, and biases. Consider sharing a personal story or challenge with your team to highlight a learning experience or growth moment, fostering a more profound sense of community and mutual support.

Be Curious – Embrace Both/And - integrate Multiple Perspectives

Recognise the value of staying curious and open to diverse perspectives. In a polarised, dualistic world, conscious leaders navigate paradox and welcome multiple viewpoints. In your following conversation, practice active listening by summarising what the other person has said and asking questions that deepen your understanding and invite new perspectives. Doing so demonstrates genuine interest and respect for their viewpoint while fostering a more inclusive dialogue.

Walk the Talk – align authenticity and action

After each significant conversation:

1. Take a few moments to reflect on what went well, what could have been improved, and how the interaction aligned with your intentions.
2. Use these insights to refine your approach for future interactions.
3. Regularly review your leadership practices and conversations to ensure they reflect your core values and intentions and consider how you can enhance the coherence between your internal beliefs and external actions.

These strategies will help you bring coherence to your inner and outer worlds and inform your choices down the road to success.

The journey to conscious leadership is an ongoing process of inner work, intentional action and reflective practice. Our inner world, where our conscious and sub-conscious connect, is the primary place of change. By preparing our inner world for exception interaction and open dialogue, we not only elevate our leadership but contribute to a more connected and human world.

As a strategic facilitator I help you shape and facilitate leadership conversations at your away days or if you have a distributed team, online. Leading through Conversation is not only about those critical conversations it is about every conversation. We create conscious cultures on conversation, one relationship at a time. If you want to empower your leadership teams to have high value conversation, then build their capacity to turn every conversation into a vehicle for personal growth and business impact.

I offer strategic facilitation, individual and team coaching or a more formal masterclasses to help you Master your Inner Voice and hone the Nine Conversations of Conscious Leadership. Please feel free to connect with me and let's start the conversation.