The internal and external of networking

One of the ways that I got over my dislike and fear of networking was to really put the needs of my work, actually my ambition, ahead of my feelings.  Networking is first, a personal exercise; of building an internal relationship with your external self.  About being convinced and comfortable on the inside first before expressing your authentic self with that power smile, sometimes, despite the internal turmoil of vulnerability.  Once you’ve implicitly appreciated that networking is a professional activity that has the potential to advance your career, Vinay Hebbar simplifies with some easy(ier)-to-do, next steps.  “Making time to learn about colleagues and building meaningful relationships outside your team is critical for future growth within the organization.   Take every opportunity to organize a team get together, join team outings, do volunteer service with teams, and join special project teams."

My relationship with networking, was very similar to what Priya Loba says of networking.  “I used to find it very uncomfortable initially! Schmoozing, socialising, of being an extroverted person.  But then I made it a point to attend, find people I could converse with.  It just got better.  It is about meeting interesting people and interesting conversations.”  

Whatever may be the preparation one puts in before a particular networking event and irrespective of the kind of networker that you are, in my limited years of making it a point to connect with people; or striking up first-time conversations and extending a handshake with someone I didn’t know from a minute ago, I can say with full conviction that networking is the best way to speed dial your way into jobs, business and opportunities.  “I believe in the power of social capital.  And collaborating with people who share my values or interests has really supported my vision and business growth.  We are working globally and in this current situation, nothing matters more that connecting and building strong relationships,” Farah Ismail says pointedly. 

Abhi Patwardhan sounds a lot like me in my earlier years! “Networking was a lot tougher during the early part of my career.  I couldn’t get myself to attend the events. I think networking has become a lot easier now due to social media and the changing times.  I am a tactical networker.  If I need help with something, I will look for connections to do so.  I have to be clear in my ask.  If I am not, I will not seek a connection.  Similarly, I would like to believe that people connect with me because I can help them.”  

Contrastingly, Anuprita Bhomick is, “Very interested in people, and I am always very curious about many different things.  I might be strategic about certain networking opportunities.  For example, I may decide to meet someone that I don’t really know, because they are involved in a project that I am deeply interested to be a part of.  But at other times, I could just have a personal conversation which might lead to a friendship, that I may nurture and in that sense my networking style may be very personal.  I don’t think I enjoy operational networking.  It seems very transactional to me.  I will always stay in touch with impressive and interesting people I meet through occasional pings on social media and when possible inviting them for a coffee or a meal.  I seldom eat alone.” 

The outcome driven approach of getting something out of a handshake or a coffee has earned networking its reputation of being selfish, slimy and sales'y. To the contrary, Jo Anne doesn’t attach outcome to her networking and has grown to pursue networking through her “Curiosity in psychology, learning about ‘new people,' how they tick, how they behave, that makes networking more interesting and fun.  Of the approach that ‘I will speak to you and connect with you, if you bring value to me and my business,’ I think this transactional skew has changed.  Nowadays, what might happen through the person you are speaking with? Be engaged in the conversation, and who knows?” she queries of the vast potential of networking. 

Jerene Ang supplements with the preparation she undertakes towards her people-first approach to networking.  “When going to an event where many HR professionals will be present, I'd look up a couple of trending HR topics, just so I'd be able to roughly understand what they are saying and cross question whenever necessary.  Since I'm not an expert in HR by any means, I find it helpful to ask questions and let others share their experience. From what I've observed, people do like talking about themselves, or what they're passionate about, a fair bit.”  A useful insight - of going beyond the transaction of networking.  Of really making it about the other person.  

Career management has moved from being an interplay between the organisation and its employees to being a personal endeavour by the employee.  And the gig economy, heightened by the pandemic and enabled by technology has only given more agency to the employee to manage their careers.  

It is for reasons such as these, that networking for Chris Siem, “Is something that I have developed over the years, as an integral part of my professional responsibilities, including being an active contributor to several professional network organizations in the region.  As a principle, I like to make connections based on mutual value.  My personal style revolves around identifying common interests and regular checking in with priority contacts.  Exchange of perspectives, understanding, opportunities, or otherwise. But always with a specific objective(s).”   

Jerene Ang’s cuts the deal with her own brand of authenticity. “We aim to form a network which we can approach for help whenever we need.  For that to happen, I think there needs to be a certain depth to the connection.  I believe that true connections are made by being your authentic self.”

Love Sarin extends networking into the realm of being selfless.  “If you have something to help the other person with, it really opens the door more easily and you can make a deeper connection.  What kind of potential of opportunities open up and makes their life easier or interesting if they get to know you? If you can make them realize that, without selling and or pitching, rather letting them come to that conclusion on their own, then they will be much more interested to keep the connection alive.” This is when networking moves out from being a hustle to becoming a noble pursuit, when the self is second.  Extending the arm of giving, Farah Ismail, says, “I would love to believe that people engage with me because they feel listened to, they can be themselves, there is no judgement and that they can express their needs.  A safe space to be vulnerable and courageous.”  

I am of the belief that networking gets better with age.  I observed, learnt, imbibed and then performed, bouncing back from slips building upon my strengths, as I was gaining in confidence.   Just as Michael Jenkin validates, “I think you probably do grow in confidence as your career develops and you have more experience and more stories to draw on when you're talking with people.  I think it's something that can get easier with time.”  On the other end of the table, what is networking for someone who becomes a CFO at 26, I query of Kriti Makhija.  “There was a slight inhibition in earlier years.  For networking with contemporaries across the industry and other leadership groups with more experience, I did prepare with context of the group.  However, I am a natural conversationalist and authentic to the core.  So, I am ‘me’ all the time and that makes networking comfortable.  In fact, if I apply myself to networking consciously, I will, perhaps not be so effortless!"

Fully appreciating what she has gained by actively and consciously engaging with her network, Dr. Melanie Peacock, a post-secondary educator, mentors her crop of students to simply, well, ‘network.’  “Networking needs to be a process that one intentionally engages in.  It takes thought, time and effort. I actively discuss the importance of networking with students, dialogue about how to do this and provide numerous opportunities during their learning to actually practice.”

For those who aren’t as fortunate to have ‘learnt’ networking at school, Michael Jenkins shares some advice.  “One is to see networking as a way to continue to learn about how human beings think; two, to make friendships and simply enjoy being with people and three, of course to help you with your work or your business. I remember President Bill Clinton was famous for really talking to people - in other words when he was talking to you, really felt that he was concentrating on the conversation with you.  So, in a F2F event, avoid looking over your interlocutor’s shoulder to see if there's somebody more interesting to talk to!”

As the co-founder of a design consultancy firm, Fractal Ink, acquired by advertising conglomerate, DAN and Country Head of Isobar’s consultancy practice, Priyanka Agrawal bets on “building relationships before speaking shop.  My decision of connecting with people doesn’t depend on their profiles.  A student or a potential client both have equal weightage in my network,” she wears her success with humility.  “Be genuine.  Be honest.  Be humble. Contribute,” are Priyanka’s pillars of networking.

Vinay Hebbar’s experience serve as a guidepost to those who in their hurry to deliver networking outcomes.   “In my early years, I learnt the importance of networking but didn’t quite appreciate the importance of depth, long termism and mutuality of networking.  I often fell into the trap of trying to meet as many people as possible at a conference, schmooze with senior people, and demonstrate to my bosses that I had effective networking skills.  This wasn’t something I enjoyed - nor was it effective.  Once I changed my approach, it was far less challenging, and infinitely more effective.  It is the quality of interactions, your ability to develop a positive and sustained relationship of trust which matters.”  

While Farah Ismail lists down her keywords of networking as “Belonging, Inclusion and Community,” Vinay Hebbar adds, “Diversity,” to the mix.  “Many tend to focus on building networks with others from similar backgrounds, ‘My industry, fellow alumni, or someone who is for example, a finance expert like me.’  Do you meet people who are very different from you; could be geographic, social backgrounds, industry, function, racial parameters and therefore allow you to learn, grow and build perspective?”  The opportunity of interacting with people who live distinctly to the way you do and appreciating work environments that are unique from your workplace are breeding grounds of knowledge and learning, offering invaluable opportunity for personal and professional growth.  Conclusively, Dolon Gupta, says this stunningly.  “Networking is less about self-propaganda and more about curiosity. A keen interest in how things function in others’ worlds broaden our own horizons.  In the process, we also step into the world of other people, understand them better and build more lasting connects.”

Taking networking as seriously as “Making it part of my daily routine,” Yoosuf Moiz’s endearing style of networking shouldn’t be mistaken as casual.  “I have an authentic interest in getting to know someone new and learning something new, of being humble, listening instead of talking,” he says.  All this with an unflinching line of vision on the “Opportunities to connect to new people and business, sometimes immediately and sometimes for the future,” he discloses of the impact of networking. 

On authenticity, Anuprita expands when she says, “My advice is to not be immediately dismissive of a person you meet or network with.  Take the time to get to know them beyond the surface. I have often seen people being very shallow with their approach.  You may lose out on getting to know someone who is really influential and knowledgeable, just because they are quieter and don’t volunteer a lot of information about themselves.  Second, you can never be short-term about your network. Think of investing deeply into your network before you can start reaping the benefits.  Finally, always ask, ‘What I can do for you,’ rather than telling people what you want them to do for you.  Confidence, helpfulness and gratitude. For me that’s the 1-2-3 of networking,” is what she signs off with. 

Dolon Gupta’s 2G network of “Being Genuine,” and “Be Generous,” in these days of superfast network connectivity (yes, pun deliberately intended) comes from the place of good intention, the basis of any relationship.  “Networking is not about false personae.  It’s about putting your real self out there. It’s about taking a genuine interest in the person in front, rather than focusing only on the designation on the business card.   The primary purpose of networking is not about looking for opportunities where one can maximize benefits for oneself.  One gets only as much out of networking as one gives.  Networking is about sharing.” 

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by the contributors in this article are personal and do not reflect the official policy or position of the organisations or institutions where they are employed.