Issue 36: The virtue of neighborliness

Welcome to Issue 36 of The Happiness Abstract. In the Lab’s pursuit to translate and spread the happiness science, perhaps the most common finding is this: loving relationships are crucial for well-being. 

That’s obvious, you might say. What is less obvious, though, is how to go about the messy work of building such relationships. That’s true now more than ever. Ample evidence suggests that in the last several decades, Americans have fewer friends, more schism with their family members, and on the whole are lonelier. Recently, we investigated an often overlooked subcategory of “close relationships”: neighbors. The data here are no different from the troubling statistics on family and friends—lately, we spend less time with our neighbors, and, as a result, our wellbeing suffers. 

Pew poll data from 2019 revealed that only 57% of Americans say they know some of their neighbors; even fewer (26%) say they know most of them. And the pandemic certainly did not help matters. Research from the Institute for Family Studies found that the share of Americans who spend a social evening with their neighbors several times a month has markedly declined. In 1974, for example, 44% of Americans did so; by 2022, that share fell to 28%. 

Why does this matter? Scholars have long known that neighborliness—that is, an inclination toward friendliness and altruism—is correlated to social trust and a sense of community, both of which are strong predictors of life satisfaction. Moreover, neighborliness plays an important role on the psychological level: Scholars in 2009 proved that “reciprocity of liking” is a key factor in making friendships. In this study, the scholars showed that people are predisposed to like people who liked them. Neighborliness, in its most basic function, is expressing that you like, and have an interest in, your neighbor. This expression of liking is a major catalyst for making friends; it warms people’s hearts and quickly makes them more likely to like you. But as neighborliness levels have dropped—whether this is based on shifting individual preferences, or perhaps the structural decline of spaces in which people gather—so too has the frequency of these “initial expressions of liking.” And when no one makes the first move, as it were, friendship between neighbors naturally declines. 

Happily, this Issue comes on the heels of a holiday you might not know of: National Good Neighbor Day (September 28). President Carter established this holiday in 1978 to encourage people to be good neighbors and to build thriving communities. So, as an ode to the holiday, this Issue is dedicated to its mission. The literature is rich about why neighborliness matters and how to revivify it. 

The neighborliness + happiness connection. How exactly are happiness and neighbor relationships entwined? Scholars writing in The Journals of Gerontology investigated this question by surveying over 1,000 adults aged 40-70 across a 10-year period. Over the lifetime of the study, the participants were surveyed on three key measures: (1) eudaimonic well-being, (2) contact with neighbors, and (3) social support from neighbors. After controlling for socioeconomic and health factors, the results were telling: People who experienced continuously low contact with their neighbors witnessed a 17.8% decline in their eudaimonic well-being over the sample period. But social support had an even greater effect: People who perceived continuously low social support from their neighbors witnessed a 29.5% well-being decline. As such, if you wish to be happier, a good starting point is to simply make contact with your neighbors—introduce yourself and take an interest in your neighbors’ lives. A better strategy is to lean on your neighbors. This can start out with a smaller bid for social support (such as asking your neighbors to water your plants while you’re away) as you build trust within the relationship and scale up from there. 

These efforts—that is, these “expressions of liking”—are likely to lead to reciprocity from your neighbors. You’ll help to make your neighbors happier, and with the benefit of your new friendships, you’ll be happier as well. 

The role of neighbors in hard times. As noted above, the coronavirus pandemic generally corroded neighborliness between households. However, a small subsection of the population found ways to invest in these relationships amidst lockdowns and experienced boosts in their wellbeing. Recent research in Population Health used longitudinal data from over 4,500 Swiss citizens amid the pandemic and subsequent lockdowns. These data captured the citizens’ self-reported well-being and the strength (or lack thereof) of their neighborly relations from 2019 to 2020. In the end, those who improved their neighborly relations during this period experienced a 37% increase in subjective well-being and a 28% improvement in generalized trust. It seems critical, then, to build local social capital, given that neighborliness predicts happier outputs even amid crisis. But we don’t need a pandemic to usher in this change. A good rule of thumb is to improve your neighborly relations now—perhaps starting by helping a neighbor in need, who is experiencing difficulties in his or her life. Lightening someone’s load will be a boon for both of you.

Who needs neighborliness? And how to bring it? We all need neighborliness, but some groups benefit from it more than others—namely, the retired and the unemployed. Researchers writing in Environment and Planning surveyed 614 Irish citizens and measured their levels of neighborliness (that is, the extent to which individuals think their neighbors look out for each other and whether they know many of their neighbors). The scholars found that one standard deviation increase in “neighborly interaction” led to a 54% increase in the probability of reporting higher life satisfaction. The retired and the unemployed benefited the most from increased neighborly relations. 

This study has two key implications, one for individuals and another for policymakers. First, retired or unemployed individuals are especially prone to loneliness, and this study indicates that a possible cure to the loneliness is to boost one’s neighborly interactions. But the onus should not only be on these vulnerable individuals. On the contrary: if you are young and married (and are fortunate to have many friends), you may not find yourself hungering for additional social connections—but as this study suggests, you should pay special attention to those living around you who may be more at risk of social disconnection. The next time you see your neighbor who is newly retired, or perhaps one who is down on his or her luck, think of this as an opportunity: Expressing your liking and interest for that neighbor will do wonders for their happiness, and you’ll likely make a new friend along the way. 

Second, policymakers should think about key ways to boost neighborly interactions. One enlightening study from 2012, for example, found that each additional “positive neighborhood feature”—connected sidewalks, front porches, and the absence of litter—increased the odds of neighborliness by nearly 70%. If you are in a leadership position within your community, consider advocating for infrastructure changes such as these. In a real sense, these avenues might play a role in reducing loneliness, building trust, and making your more vulnerable neighbors happier.

Bryce Fuemmeler, Senior Research Associate, Leadership & Happiness Laboratory

Carolyn Bruckmann, Research Assistant, Harvard Kennedy School MPP ‘25