"It’s the Title, Not Me": Reclaiming Your Worth Beyond Labels in Leadership

Yesterday, I had a meeting with a woman in middle management, and her words have been resonating with me ever since. She told me how, before becoming a manager, her ideas and recommendations were often ignored or brushed aside. But when she stepped into her new role, people began listening and following her advice. What struck her was that nothing had changed about her knowledge or skills — it was just the title.

When I asked her about how she felt regarding her status within the company, she paused and said, “It’s the title, not me.” Her response hit me deeply, because I know that feeling all too well, and I know many of you do, too. There’s this moment, this line we often walk in leadership, especially as women, where we wonder, “Am I truly being valued, or is it just this title that gives me credibility?”

This conversation reminded me of the internal tug-of-war so many of us face — the back-and-forth between feeling empowered by our roles and feeling limited by them. For so many women, stepping into leadership feels like both a triumph and a test, especially when that little voice inside starts asking the hard questions.

The Quiet Struggle of Inner Dialogue

It’s one thing to be given a title; it’s another to feel worthy of it. Imagine what her inner dialogue must have sounded like:

“Why did no one listen to me before? Was I not good enough then?” "Are they really respecting me now, or are they just respecting my title?" "If this title was taken away, would I still have the same voice, the same influence?"

For many women in leadership roles, this internal monologue can feel relentless. We question ourselves, replay conversations in our minds, and wonder if we’re only as good as our latest title or promotion. And while titles can certainly amplify our voices, they don’t define our value. They can become a temporary source of confidence, sure, but one that feels fragile, almost conditional.

Challenging the Power of the Title

Titles have a way of granting permission, a signal to the world that says, “This person matters; listen to her.” But when our sense of worth and influence is tied to a title, it’s like building a house on shifting sands. Because what happens when that title changes? When our influence feels conditional, it becomes easy to believe that the respect we receive is tied to something external, rather than to our own worth and expertise.

“Do they value me, or do they value my role?”

It’s a painful question to ask, yet one that’s so often on the minds of women in leadership. When we work hard, grow our skills, and finally break through to a role that feels like “we’ve arrived,” it’s hard not to wonder if we’ve actually been valued all along — or if we’ve only now become “acceptable” because of the position we hold.

Finding Power Within, Not Just from a Title

So, what if we changed the narrative? What if we could say, with complete confidence, “The title isn’t what makes me valuable; it’s simply a platform to show who I already am”? This shift in thinking allows us to separate our worth from our roles and recognize that our influence comes from within, not from a label on an organizational chart.

Imagine rewriting that inner dialogue:

“I have always brought value, long before this title.”

For women in leadership, this realization can be a game-changer. When we allow ourselves to believe that our contributions are worthy, regardless of the title we hold, we find ourselves rooted, confident, and able to lead in a way that’s authentic and unshakeable.

Reclaiming Your Authority from Within

If you’ve ever felt that the respect you receive is based more on your title than on who you truly are, know that you’re not alone. Many women in leadership feel this way. And while it’s a difficult journey, there are ways to reclaim that authority from within. Here are a few steps that have helped me and may help you, too:

1. Own Your Inner Validation: Begin to shift your perspective by affirming your own worth. Reflect on the moments when you made an impact, when you brought value to the table, long before any title was attached to your name.
2. Build Relationships Based on Authenticity: Connect with others in your organization as your genuine self, not just as “the manager” or “the director.” When your relationships are grounded in respect and authenticity, people begin to see you for you — and the influence that comes with that goes beyond any role.
3. Reclaim Your Unique Identity: Titles come and go, but your strengths and vision are enduring. Connect deeply with what makes you unique and recognize that those qualities are what create real influence, whether or not they come with an official role.

Moving Beyond “It’s Just the Title”

The woman I spoke to yesterday may have felt that her influence was tied to her title, but I could see a power within her that went far beyond any label. She held insights, resilience, and passion that had been there all along, waiting for others to see. The title didn’t create her worth — it merely allowed others to witness it.

To every woman who’s ever felt her voice only matters when a title gives it permission, I want you to know that your value isn’t defined by any external label. Your insights, your contributions, and your strengths are what truly matter. A title may help others see it, but you don’t need it to know it for yourself.

Because, at the end of the day, it’s not the title that makes the leader. It’s the woman behind it. And that woman — you — is powerful beyond measure.

Are You Ready to Step into Your Authentic Identity as a Leader?

If you’re a woman in leadership who’s tired of questioning whether it’s you or the title that brings value, the Authentic Identity Leadership Programme is for you. Starting in January 2025, this transformative journey is designed to help women in leadership move from spectators of their lives to empowered, authentic leaders.

Through this program, you’ll uncover and overcome the self-judgment that holds you back, gain clarity on your unique identity, and build the confidence to lead with purpose and presence — without relying on a title to define you. You’ll learn to claim your voice, create your own path, and lead in a way that’s true to you.

Let’s work together to silence the doubts, build unshakeable confidence, and embrace an identity that empowers you every single day. This isn’t about the title; it’s about the leader you already are.

Join us in January '25, and take the first step toward becoming the leader you were always meant to be.