Jester, disruptor, mind reader: The three faces of an executive coach
Picture a professional tennis player who goes it alone without a coach. To prepare for the season, she reads a tennis book or two, practices a few serves, and spends some time on her forehand and backhand; then, she battles through her games alone. In real life, such a player probably wouldn’t get very far; she certainly wouldn’t become the next Serena Williams. It is curious, then, that so many senior leaders opt for precisely this approach. They rely on what they have learned in the past and assume it will ensure their success for seasons to come. They go it alone without a trainer. What’s more, they do so in a business environment fraught with ever-increasing challenges.
We are living through an era of unprecedented change and upheaval. The simultaneous challenges of the pandemic, climate change, digitalization, geopolitical tensions and generational shift are confronting businesses with questions that are hard to answer. Survival in this environment demands transformation – on a scale that goes far beyond the periodic restructurings of the past. It requires a paradigm shift, not least including new skills and ways of thinking on the part of leaders. Old models to leadership are suddenly proving unfit for use. Today, leaders must be catalysts and shapers of the future. They must think across boundaries, bring people together, build trust, empower their teams, delegate effectively – and know when to step back. This can be tricky, to say the least.
Just like professional athletes, many top leaders now rely on the support of an executive coach to compete successfully in the top division. In turn, these managers’ leadership methods frequently see them step into the role of coach themselves – a development in line with the trend of the times, as observed in detail by bestsellers like The Coaching Habit. But what defines a good coach? Good coaching is often described as the ability to only ask questions, to listen, not to judge and, in doing so, to encourage the client to tackle problems and challenging situations independently. This type of coaching is also referred to as ‘non-directive coaching’. In my view, however, this description falls short. When I ask top executives what they expect from a good coach, they usually describe skills that can be summed up rather punchily in three distinct roles: jester, disruptor and mind reader.
The coach as court jester
In times gone by, it was the court jester who was tasked with holding up a mirror to the ruler of the day and playfully confronting them with the truth of the times. These were truths that likely would never have been acknowledged otherwise. Today, we would probably refer to such truths as ‘feedback’. Feedback is a gift, but not everyone is able to obtain enough of it. This applies all the more when we rise to the higher echelons of management.
Those who climb to the top of the career ladder know how lonely it can feel. One key challenge is the difficulty of obtaining objective feedback, either because feedback-givers are sycophantic or because they are afraid to be honest. The problem is that when feedback ceases to be balanced, the danger arises of overestimating one’s performance. Quite a number of top leaders fall at this hurdle.
In this situation, a suitably qualified coach can help us to reconcile identity and reputation. Personality tests like the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator Test (MBTI®) and the Fundamental Interpersonal Relations Orientation Test (FIRO-B®) can play a vital role in this tricky task, helping leaders to better understand different facets of their own personality. They reveal, for example, why we sometimes feel the need to withdraw, why we struggle to access our intuition and develop an over-dependence on facts, or why we go overboard with planning. We might realize that we crave a greater sense of connection and affinity with our colleagues than we have been expressing outwardly. By supplementing the results of these personality tests with concrete observations from 360-degree feedback, coaches can provide eye-opening insights.
Just as court jesters packaged the truth in rhymes and songs, so coaches are skilled at conveying feedback in a way that is digestible for the coaching client yet drives to the heart of what needs to be communicated. Cleverly chosen metaphors and analogies create emotional resonance with the coachee and ensure that the message sticks.
It is at this point that a coach’s real work begins. Now, he or she steps into the role of paid disruptor.
The coach as disruptor
“A good coach should always pull my chair away when I get too comfortable,” a client once told me. “Only this ensures that I will keep moving”. Put simply, this means the coach must keep the client sufficiently on their toes to prevent them from falling back into old patterns of behavior. This could be achieved, for example, through uncomfortable questions or persistent reminders of the agreed action plan.
The coach uses a range of devices and tools during this phase. They might, for example, shadow the leader in weekly meetings, sharing their observations and using this feedback to develop concrete action points. In our sports coaching analogy, this would be the team meeting with the coach after a big game. To practice new behaviors, the coach may use role-playing. “I hate role-playing,” you may be thinking to yourself. You’re not alone: many of my clients tell me the same. They know, however, how effective role-playing can be. Is it better if I as a leader simply have the intention to show more empathy, or if train my empathic skills using a role-played appraisal interview? The answer is clear. When we train at tennis, we need to hit balls; it is not sufficient just to talk about our stroke.
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A good coach is not only there when the client calls them. They will also reach out to the client unexpectedly, to provide a timely reminder of the client’s good intentions. Such contact might occur in the form of a short phone call, a text message, or the forwarding of an interesting article. Sometimes it is the duty of a good coach to make their client uncomfortable, like a jack-in-the-box that pops up when well-worn habits threaten to worm their way back in. This is precisely what the coach is paid for, as well as, of course, for guiding the leader on the most elusive path of all: that to his or her inner self.
The coach as mind reader
In the past, those who wanted to talk through their problems and wrongdoings went to confession for a listening ear. Now, as then, what we so often need is someone who listens: a person who deliberately does not make suggestions or offer tips, but is simply there with a receptive ear. For many modern leaders, it is the coach who fulfils this listening role.
The art of listening is one that must be learned; it does not consist in merely passing the time thinking of what to say on our ‘next turn’. A professional coach understands that proper listening takes place at a deep level. It guides the coach to an understanding of what is happening beneath the surface. What is the leader’s affect? What bodily reactions can be observed? What is the leader not telling the coach out loud?
In order for proper listening to occur, a coach must create a safe space in which silence is also given its place. “Silence?” you might be thinking. “Not saying anything at all?” Yes. While silence may be difficult for us to sit with, it is often in times of not speaking that our inner voice becomes perceptible. As we work on ourselves as leaders, this access to our inner voice opens up a whole new dimension beyond superficial tools. It is probably the highest benefit to be gained from effective coaching.
Coaching as an ‘Archimedes lever’
Never has coaching been so important as in the age of the ‘Great Resignation’. As success unexpectedly turns elusive, many leaders encounter the feeling of having reached a turning point. They need support. At this point, there are three questions that are really matter when trying to identify the coach for them:
A good coach helps a leader to gain clarity and replenish their energy stores. If the leader succeeds in channelling these positive effects forward, coaching can even become the ‘Archimedes lever’ that triggers unprecedented and much-needed organizational change. Thus, be on the lookout for your own jester, disrupter and mind reader: their impact might be much greater than the sum of their parts.
Christian Greiser is an executive coach, consultant and author. He guides thought-leaders, future-shapers, decision-makers and entrepreneurs on their personal development journeys, helping them figure out their values, talents and strengths. Prior to founding his consultancy, Christian held the role of Senior Partner at the Boston Consulting Group (BCG) . His book ’Remove, Replace, Restart: The essential maintenance manual for your engine for success’ will be published by Gabal Verlag on 10th of October 2023.
Founder & CEO, Group 8 Security Solutions Inc. DBA Machine Learning Intelligence
7moThank you for your share!
I help high achieving Christian women (40+) who feel unfulfilled, disconnected or yearning for more, to unlock their God given purpose in just 90 days using my FREE method. Christian Leadership, Life & Career Coach
1yChristian Greiser I came upon your post and truly love your intriguing outlook on the three faces of an executive coach. I resonate with the disruptor and court jester faces and belief that these faces intersect at crucial points in our coaching experience personally and professionally.
Dr.-Ing. Maschinenbau | Antriebstechnologie & Innovation | Business Technology Expert | Achtsame Führungskraft | Technik und Meditation im Einklang
1yGreat report, Christian Greiser. Thanks for sharing!
Personal Vision für Top-Führungskräfte und Unternehmer*innen. Mehr Klarheit, Schubkraft, Freude und Sinn. Im Privatleben und im Business. Und in Krisen- und Kriegsgebieten.
1yChristian Greiser mind reader indeed!!!