Just...Breathe...

Even in the most chaotic of times, a simple yet slow, deep breath can help to regain your calm.

When your colleague has interrupted your work flow which took you so long to get into, just to talk about something you’re not focused on…

…Breathe!

When your partner forgets to take the bins out, again, after already asking them several times…

…Breathe!

When your parent or child projects their self-directed anger and frustration onto you, because they don’t know how to manage their own emotions…

…Breathe!

When you get upset at yourself because you were emotionally triggered by something you thought no longer gripped you…

…Breathe!

I know you may not like being accosted with such simple, common-sense advice about ‘something we do every day, all day’.

However, I will let you in on a little (known but oft-forgotten) secret…

…Sometimes the simplest of things, have the most impact.

What I am sharing with you today is not new, profound or revolutionary.

Yet, conscious and intentional breathing is the most important, fundamental and only consistently available resource, in your self-regulation toolkit.

Self-regulation is the superpower at the core of self-leadership — being able to manage your emotions, reactions and self-talk, is the key for being able to:

• Explore the deepest depths of yourself,
• Treat yourself kindly and with self-compassion,
• Act on your reflections and insights so you grow and move forward,
• Maintain focus and momentum to achieve your goals,
• Develop positive relationships with others,
• And most importantly, cultivate a supportive relationship with yourself.

The power of self-regulation is why learning how to manage your breath, is one of the most important skills you can learn along your self-leadership journey.

There has been much research and evidence gathered around the benefits of breathing, the impact it has on our brains, nervous systems, stress levels, emotions etc. and especially regarding various breathing techniques utilised by eastern practices (e.g. yoga, meditation etc.).

I am not a medical science gal, so I will spare you the details and if you’re interested, you can go down your own research rabbit-holes.

What I will share with you though, is a few of my go-to breathing techniques and when you may want to use them for yourself.

When you are feeling stressed, try Diaphragmatic / Belly Breathing:

• This breathing technique is best down whilst laying on your back, but can also be done sitting up (just sit up straight whilst doing so).
• Gently close your eyes and place one hand on your chest and one hand on your stomach, just below your ribcage.
• Take slow deep breaths in and out.
• Focus on breathing from your stomach — your hand on your stomach should rise and fall with your breathing, whilst your hand on your chest should not.
• Keep breathing until you feel your body let go of the stress.

When you are feeling anxious or overwhelmed, try Box Breathing:

• Whilst sitting comfortably, gently close your eyes and begin slowly breathing in and mentally count to four (this is not 4 seconds, but just your slow counting up to 4) — 1…2…3…4
• Hold your breathe in and mentally count to four — 1…2…3…4
• Breathe slowly out and mentally count to four — 1…2…3…4
• And then once again, hold your (now empty) breathe and mentally count to four — 1…2…3…4
• Repeat slowly and evenly for at least another 3 times or until you feel more calm and present.
• For those who need an extra boost to help overcome anxiety or overwhelm, then try visualising or physically tracing the outside of a box whilst you’re breathing.

When you need a boost of energy, try Double Breathing (disclaimer, this is not recommended for anyone who is pregnant or has any cardiovascular issues):

• This breathing technique may make you feel a little light-headed, so it is best done whilst comfortably sitting up in a chair or lying down on your back.
• Begin by inhaling through the nose with a short, sharp inhalation and then followed directly by a long, strong inhale.
• Then without pausing, exhale through the nose and mouth with a short, then long exhale.
• Repeat 5 times then pause for a short break before beginning your next round.
• This technique is meant to be fast paced to stimulate the sympathetic nervous system, which helps give you a burst of energy. Great for the afternoon slump!

The power of the breath has become more known over the last few years due to things like ‘breath work’ becoming more popularised.

There are many more breathing techniques than the ones I have shared with you today, for various purposes and benefits. It is worth considering attending a breath work class or private session to get you started in understanding how to use this valuable self-regulation tool.

I encourage you to practice these techniques and I would love to hear about your experiences, so please comment on this article or message me when you have given these techniques a go for yourself.

Now, for one last little gift of wisdom…

…Did you know that matching your breathing pattern with that of another person, helps you to accelerate your rapport with them? And when people intentionally match and take slow, deep breaths together, it can help you to co-regulate and calm your nervous systems?

Isn’t that just so cool?!

Just another benefit of intentionally and consciously focusing on your breath!

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Thank you for reading this fortnight’s newsletter! I appreciate you!

Until next time —

Crystal McKendrick

Leadership and Management Consultant - Shape Consulting

Self-Leadership Author - Lead Self | Lead Well

https://tinyurl.com/LeadSelfLeadWell