The Key Strength You're Missing
Despite the fact that gender equity in the workplace has made some progress in the past 25 years, there is still quite a long way to go, especially in the corporate sector. Some companies claim to have achieved things like, “30% gender equity, and counting”, but it doesn’t take a data scientist to see that all of that progress is happening below a certain level in the company. When you look at their Senior leadership level, it mostly disappears.
For women who are employed in these companies, the day-to-day effects can be very real. Male-dominated workplaces are historically resistant to women’s contributions, and that can play out in meetings, performance reviews, panels, presentations and even at networking events. For example, you might have had the experience of feeling like whenever you bring up a good point in a meeting, it’s ignored until it’s repeated by a male staffer, who then gets all the credit.
But there is another issue that is worth your attention. Many women inside corporate environments, in order to survive and prevail so they can keep working, unconsciously adopt the “kill or be killed” mindset that is common in high-performing, male-dominated workplaces. You may have even come to believe that success is a zero-sum game, and that the other women in your workplace are a direct threat to your success.
If you're like most of my clients, you probably didn’t start out that way. When you were a young woman at the very beginning of your career, you didn’t yet have enough skills, knowledge, experience and wisdom to be a threat to anyone. You were just working hard, head-down, trying to learn and achieve as much as you could.
But now that you’ve climbed up the ladder, things are different. You might have some amount of animosity, or even antagonism, toward the other women in your professional workplace. This isn’t entirely your fault. In fact, it’s mostly the result of having spent so much time working inside a system that wasn’t designed for women to succeed. Seen through this lens, it’s understandable that you may have lost some goodwill toward the other women as you struggled to stake out your territory, and hold onto it. You may have felt the need to play your cards close to your chest, and keep to yourself as much as possible.
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I often see this phenomenon when I enter a new workplace to give a Power Voice for Executives training to a group of women. Recently I gave an event to a group at a global finance company who had been working together for about 5 years. One of the women was from France, and because I grew up in Canada and went to a French elementary school, I could instruct her (a bit) in her native language. When we took our lunch break, another woman from the same group walked up to her and started conversing in French. This shocked the first woman, who didn't know that her longtime co-worker was fluent. Let me say that again: these two women had worked closely together for 5 years, and never known that the other spoke French!
One of the things I love best about giving group trainings is watching this type of breakthrough happen between women. As they work together to learn and practice high-level communication skills, the women encourage each other’s voices to grow literally and figuratively stronger. A collective feeling of trust is established, and as they go through the Power Voice exercises (which include writing scripts, mock-interviewing each other, and performing for the whole group), their walls break down. By the end of the event they are chatting excitedly about how to apply their new skills to upcoming projects, and making plans to continue practicing their Power Voice skills.
Having a strong, connected and trusting team is key to your success. Women are MUCH stronger when we work together. Many of the groups I work with pull women from different teams across their company to attend the training, which creates strong connections from every direction. This is a great way to forge a powerful support network going forward. By the way, those two women I mentioned earlier? They made plans to vacation in Paris this summer with their families.
DM me for details about my “Power Voice for Executives” group trainings and private session packages, or have a look on my website. I love hearing from you!
Executive Speech and Presentation Coach
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