Kinship Carers Awareness Week: Supervision and Inspection Day!

It's currently Kinship Carers Awareness Week and, whilst I typically try to write a meaningful blog, this week has caught up with me. So, instead I'm doing a day in the life in style post.

Today is a special day, a day so special it comes every six weeks!

As part of my fostering agreement, I have regular contact with two social workers every six weeks: A supporting social worker who provides supervision for me and another who is the child’s social worker. Whilst each of them is here, they will also inspect my house, the child's bedroom and check everything safe, clean and suitable.

The stars have aligned, and both are visiting today.

In addition to my role as a kinship foster carer, I also work full-time.

Here's what my day looks like:

7am: Get up, eat breakfast together, and see the child off to school.

7:15am: Down an espresso and mentally prepare for the next two hours.

7:30am: Get dressed and clean the house from top to bottom in preparation for my two visits. Fun fact: my fostering agreement requires at least one unannounced visit a year, so I always try to keep it somewhat presentable.

8:30am: Prepare for my financial audit. Finances are different from typical child benefits, and I have two payments, one of which I need to audit, keep receipts for, and get signed off by my supervising social worker. Catching up with six weeks of receipts and expenses is every bit as fun as you imagine—and requires two calculators!

9:15am: Double-check all the key spots in the house to ensure I haven't missed anything.

9:25am: Make coffee, no matter how busy I am, I strongly believe in being a good host.

9:30am: Supervision. We discuss the events of the past six weeks, including two CPD courses I completed as part of my requirements as a foster carer, and begin to prepare for my annual interview with the fostering panel, which is required every year to continue as a foster carer.

11:30am: Get back to work and catch up on everything I've missed in the morning.

12pm: Eat lunch.

12:30pm: Back to work. I have two meetings with candidates and then it’s then head down for a few hours as I am trying to get three roles ready to go live. I make good progress and get a solid draft of all three roles prepared.

4pm: My nephew's social worker visits. I have a few important conversations to ensure my nephew is getting the right support.

5:30pm: After the social worker leaves, it's time to cook dinner. I made us homemade paneer korma with coconut rice. Too mild for me, but my nephew loved it so that’s a win. We always eat together at the table with no devices, which is the best part of my day.

6:15pm: Head to the gym. My nephew is very active, and regular exercise helps keep him regulated. Another fun fact: I'm not allowed to expense any of the cost I personally incur within the activities I do with my nephew, such as going to the gym, so I’m paying for two memberships—one for the gym I actually want, and another for a gym that allows juniors. Whilst I don’t mind this, this an example of a hidden cost which can be a problem for those who might have limited incomes.

7:30pm: Encourage my nephew to have a shower and make him a post-gym snack.

8pm: Fake bedtime. I encourage my nephew to put away his laundry which I managed to finish during the day and spend some time winding down. I catch up on emails and bits of work.

9pm: Actual bedtime! Glad I'm not a child now because this is when all devices get locked and blocked. We hug and he goes to bed. I finish up the last few tasks at work, post this blog and take the chance to chill out for a while.

It's a busy day, but I made a commitment to show my nephew what a hardworking carer looks like. While we never have slow days, we have a good life and always manage to fit everything in. We make time to spend with each other, eat well, and exercise.

So why am I posting this?

Three reasons:

First, there’s an assumption that being a foster carer is similar to being a parent. Naturally, there are many similarities, but I believe foster caring is different—it comes with lots of additional admin and hoops to jump through while trying to provide care for a child who has almost inevitably experienced significant trauma.

Second, many kinship foster carers don’t receive financial parity with mainstream foster carers. Many have to reduce their working hours to make it all happen, some have to quit altogether, and many find it hard to re-enter the job market if they become unemployed. To be a viable carer, you must be financially secure, before fostering payments are taken into account. This means that losing income or having to reduce your work, is a scary prospect, adding to the pressure that many carers already face.

Third, shockingly, I’ve had more than one prospective client make comments about their perceptions of my "capacity" when feeding back their decision to select a competitor. However, I always meet the deadlines I agree and achieve positive outcomes, which is something I'm deeply proud of. Given that I’ve had to overcome stigma and negative assumptions about me and my role as a kinship foster carer, I feel a sense of responsibility to speak up and shine a light on some of the challenges kinship foster carers face.

Ending on a positive

I think what I’m doing makes a difference. My nephew has caught up on nearly three years of educational attainment and genuinely believes that, if he works hard and tries his best, he can build a wonderful life for himself.

I’m sure he will, and I wouldn’t trade the life we’ve built for anything.