The Last F*cking Disaster

I woke up the other morning and found that my bank account was emptied out. Not a dime left. My first thought was, this won't be the last fucking disaster. Since my bank wouldn't be open for a few hours, I went about my normal routine. By the time I got to work a few hours later, I found that all money was restored, and the bank had a glitch in their system. Disaster averted. 

I love where I am in life. Not sure if it is because I have been meditating my entire life, or if it's because I have worked in crisis response on and off for the past 38 years... but I rarely panic or over react. The truth is, so little really requires immediate action. That pause that we practice, can save years of frustration by not acting out of fear, anger or desperation. Think about it. You know the saying, "It's not what you say, but how you say it"? Well, it's not what you do, but how you do it. Let me explain...

The first rule of crisis work is proceed when safe. Although that's different in life and death situations. I have to admit when I was younger, I ignored this rule many times. Always believed that I was divinely protected. In reality, I was just lucky. I literally can count more than a handful of times that I should have been killed. I remember one night almost 20 years ago, my wife said to me," You're married now. You can't be doing that anymore." So I am all about the pause now. 

Many of us think that everything requires a response. They may. But not all fights that you are invited to, need to be fought. Not every text requires an immediate reply. And acting without calmness is a fucking disaster. Take a minute and take a breath. If needed, take a few more minutes. How many text or emails have been sent in the wrong frame of mind? How many "oh shit's" did we have when we hit the send button? You may not be able to master the disaster. But you can master the minute. PAUSE!

What I am saying is, bad things are going to happen. We are going to have frustrating days. Find a ritual that makes sense to you when life starts piling on. A cup of coffee, yoga or a walk. Whatever feels right that is not destructive. Because life is going to happen. Have a plan to deal. Understand that this is how we survive. Because this more than likely will not be your last fucking disaster.