Leadership Digest: Edition 40

Hi Readers,

This week, it doesn’t feel right to proceed with “business as usual” in our digest. Like many of you, I’m still processing and reflecting, and I’d like to share some thoughts with you on where that reflection has led me.

This election has been a profound event, underscoring a crucial need—and, I believe, a vast opportunity—for us all to lean into what Dr. Dick Schwartz, creator of Internal Family Systems (IFS), calls Self-leadership.

In IFS, Self-leadership means we can be in relationship with all parts of ourselves—those that feel anger, grief, hate, or fear—without being driven by them. When we acknowledge, understand, and even honor these parts and their protective roles, we gain the capacity to lead from Self. In Self, we embody the 8 Cs: Curiosity, Compassion, Calm, Confidence, Clarity, Connectedness, Creativity, and Courage.

In the U.S. and around the world, many people are being led by wounded parts. This often surfaces as fear, resentment, even hostility or war. The good news is that Self is contagious. By choosing to lead from Self, we model a path out of division.

If you’re wondering what you can do to help bridge divides or create change, my suggestion is this: begin by turning inward and grounding in Self.

I’ll admit, I’m struggling with this work myself right now. I am getting owned by my feelings and parts, and many of the 8 Cs are feeling pretty damn elusive. But I’m committed to sitting with the discomfort and to being present with whatever arises, rather than numbing or avoiding. I’m getting curious about what’s unfolding within my own heart and mind, practicing gentle acceptance along the way. This is how I work my way back to Self, the place from where I can have the greatest impact and be the change I wish to see in the world.

For now, my focus is on my inner world. As a coach, I know that the more we work on our inner worlds, the more effectively we can show up in the outer world.

So, as we all navigate these uncertain months and years, I invite you to give space to your own feelings and extend grace, kindness and compassion to yourselves and your colleagues. When we meet ourselves where we are, we become better able to meet the world where it is.

You can read more on Self-leadership and IFS here.