Lessons from the pitch...

Last night I got to experience something pretty cool while helping to coach my son's U9 boys soccer team (the Knights!). 

The Knights have not lost a game all season, nor have we ever been behind in a game. Last night we came up against a team we've beaten before, but they came to play, and they scored an excellent first goal at the end of our first five-minute shift.  

Down 1-0 for the first time, and having been handibly beaten by their opponents on that shift, the boys came off the pitch pretty crushed. There was clear frustration and even some chirping - some at each other, and some at themselves. It was clear we needed to do something before the next shift.

Down 1-0. Time for feedback.

So the boys grabbed their water bottles, I sat them down on the side, and in the five minutes before they had to go back on, we went through the feedback model taught by Chiz and the Roy Group. Based on the idea of "what did you notice?", it is based on three simple questions.

What went well?

We started with the question "what went well?", with a little twist - everyone had to say one thing that a linemate had done well. It was a bit awkward at first, as they had to think about the good that had happened on the shift, instead of just the bad. But they found a way, and they started to share positive things they noticed - from good ball control, to a hard run back to play defence, to a great pass. A few smiles started to come out through this, as the boys had to compliment their teammate they were just chirping at. As they talked through it, everyone became more relaxed with each other, listening more intently to every comment and leaving the last shift behind them. 

What was tricky?

Then, we went to "what was tricky?". We were clear that a) this was not about each other, this was about the game, and that b) tricky does not mean bad, it's just....well, tricky. The answers ranged all over the place from "the dog on the sidelines looked funny" to "my shoelace came undone" to "that other player was really fast". As they all shared, they got a chance to vent a bit, laugh about the funny dog, check their shoelaces, and then get objective about the game and where there were mistakes made and things to watch out for - it was clear at this point that they were back in a positive and focused mindset.

"What can we do differently?"

The last question was "what can we do differently next shift?". At this point, the boys were getting charged up, with good ideas, clear ownership of what they needed to do, and an energy to get it done. When the ball next went out, we called subs, and some of them quickly jumped into the next rotation.

Sidebar - we have 6-player lines, and in U9 soccer it is equal play time, so with extra kids on the sidelines we are always shifting lines.        

It would have been a great outcome just to this point. But what happened next was cool. 

What happened next was cool.

We scored a goal, and then another, and then another - all three coming from the players who gave each other feedback. One goal was the first of the season for a player, and the other two came from players who have only scored one or two all season - i.e., they were not our top scorers. 

They made the whole team better.

The neat part is that they were on all different lines. It became very easy to see that those who had participated in the feedback were making the other lines better. They were communicating the most on, and off, the field. They were the ones high-fiving teamates, running off and on the field at subs, and cheering each other on. And they were the ones setting up plays and battling hardest for the ball.

In the end, the Knights won the game: 3-1.

Final score: 3-1.

I don't normally post personal stories on LinkedIn, but these young men masterfully demonstrated the power of authentic group feedback, and the real-life, high-impact the model taught by Chiz and the Roy Group can have. So, in closing on a Friday afternoon, some key lessons I am taking away from the experience and how I'm applying it to my work. 

Some key takeaways

1. The whole feedback session took less than 5 minutes, but it had an impact on the entire game.

Application: Feedback doesn't need to be an hour long chatterfest. Just 5 minutes does the trick. And if you can't find 5 minutes for something as impactful as feedback, maybe you should spend 50 minutes reflecting on why.

2. It changed the energy and tone of the whole experience for the players, and it made them easier to coach on the technical aspects of the game.

Application: 5 min of feedback gave us greater productivity and enhanced the culture, and we increased the outcomes for free (i.e., no need for a fancy coffee machine or time off).

3. These 7, 8, and 9 year olds were able to successfully follow the feedback model, and on their first experience with it.

Application: If kids can do it, surely professional adults can, too.

4. They made the whole team better, even though the whole team did not participate in the feedback session.

Application: Start small, with whomever you can. It doesn't need a process that involves everyone - at least, not at the start. 

5. Coaching is about setting the conditions to help others help themselves, not to do it for them - in fact, directing them what to do would have likely made it worse.

Application: Good leaders have a coaching mindset, and they have tools like a feedback model on hand. 

Happy Friday, all. Thanks for reading.

-Adam