Living the Work?

With all the debate around work pressure after the tragic suicide of an Indian employee at a multinational company, I felt like I should share my thoughts.

Like many Indian IT employees, I've moved through different roles—starting as a fresher, then junior, team lead, and, project manager. My views on work pressure have changed at each stage, but not in a way that contradicts my earlier views. Let me share what I think.

1 - Resigning is not an option. People often say, "Why didn’t she just quit?" but that comes from a place of privilege.

Unlike their Western counterparts, an Indian often comes out of college with a lot of pressure. It’s not just about their own future—they have an entire family, sometimes even an extended family, depending on them, especially if they're the eldest. Parents need support, younger siblings, education loans, family loans, and the pressure to keep the family’s financial status intact. It’s a lot to carry.

Quitting a job and finding another one feels like jumping from one trapeze to another without a safety net. The fall can be terrible—sometimes fatal.

Most Indian youngsters can’t take that risk, and I don’t blame them. I took the leap and I encourage others to do it, but I get why it’s not easy.

2 - Indian kids aren’t trained for work-life balance, or study-life balance—whatever you call it. Their whole childhood is just about studying—no time for fun, play, or anything else. Parents keep pushing them to study, and when they get into the workforce, they try to keep up that same intense focus, it often leads to burnout or failure.

5 - Growing up in a patriarchal society, many find it hard to say "No." So when they’re given a difficult task at work, they just smile and say "Yes," even if they’re struggling.

Ironically, these same kids, when they become team leads or project managers, pass the same attitude down to their younger colleagues. They keep pushing work down without giving anyone the chance to say ‘No'. At every level of the structure, there’s someone who wants to say “No” but ends up saying “Yes,” and this pattern continues all the way up the chain of command. It’s almost like a workplace caste system—everyone feels trapped, unable to break the cycle.

3 - There’s no sports culture. Kids don’t play enough sports, especially in high school and college. Once they start working, they notice their bodies changing, so they join the gym or try yoga. But gyms are lonely, and often just add to the mental pressure instead of helping.

4 - There’s also no real dating culture. Most people jump straight into marriage without much experience with relationships beforehand.

Do I see anything changing? To be honest, not in my lifetime.

Just a quick word of advice for team leads. You’re the immediate bosses of these kids who are just starting out. You can really make a difference. Talk to them. Try to understand their background, their capabilities, and their struggles. Ask them about their family, spouse, kids, and financial situation—gently, without being intrusive. Have video calls—it helps to see the person behind the work. Most Indian homes are toxic, and your work-from-home colleagues might be dealing with a lot. Your support can really mean something.

One part of the mother’s letter broke my heart. She wrote: "It was my daughter's great dream to take her parents to her convocation with her own hard-earned money. She booked our flight tickets and took us. It breaks my heart to tell you that even during those two days, which were the last we would spend with our child, she couldn't enjoy them because of the work pressure."

This could have been avoided. A simple conversation, a little encouragement to speak up, could have made all the difference.

That’s all. Just thought I should say this. Sorry for being preachy, couldn’t resist.