Managing Anger: Acknowledging Hurt and Practicing Healthy Self-Care

The ticket agent, with a matter-of-fact tone, informed me that the weight limit for the extra bags was 50 lbs, and I would be charged an additional $200 for each of them. Confusion and frustration welled up within me, as I was under the impression that I could have up to 70 lbs without any extra charges. I calmly explained my situation, mentioning that I had been told otherwise prior to arriving at the airport. However, the agent remained steadfast, explaining that the computer system dictated the charges, leaving her with no room for flexibility.

In that moment, I couldn't help but feel a sense of embarrassment and disappointment. The thought of having to inform the donors that $1400 of their generous contributions would be going towards this unexpected expense weighed heavily on my conscience. I contemplated the countless productive ways that money could have been utilized for the betterment of my non-profit organization. It was not anger that consumed me, but rather a deep sense of hurt over the situation.

Determined to find a solution, I made my way through TSA security and decided to contact United Airlines. Speaking to a representative, who then transferred me to a supervisor, I laid out my case and expressed my concerns. To my surprise, the supervisor listened attentively and promptly refunded the $1400. A sense of amazement washed over me, not just because of the outcome, but also because of my own behavior throughout the ordeal.

Reflecting on the situation, I realized that I had managed to navigate this frustrating experience without succumbing to anger or frustration. Instead, I chose to focus on what was within my control - making the phone call, stating my case, and asking for what I needed. The initial encounter with the ticket agent and the limitations imposed by the computer system were beyond my power to change. Accepting this fact empowered me to channel my energy towards finding a resolution.

I share this experience because I take pride in my ability to manage my emotions and handle challenging situations with composure. While anger and aggression may sometimes feel justified, this particular incident taught me the value of acknowledging hurt and practicing healthy self-care. It reminded me that maintaining a calm and rational demeanor can lead to more favorable outcomes, both for ourselves and those around us.

In conclusion, I am grateful for the opportunity to reflect on this journey and share it with you. It serves as a reminder that managing anger goes beyond simply suppressing it; it involves acknowledging the underlying emotions, practicing self-compassion, and taking constructive actions to address the situation. May we all find strength in moments of adversity and strive for positive resolutions through calmness and understanding.

Coach Michael Herbert