Maternity leave — is it really abnormally long in Estonia?

I recently stumbled upon an article (in Estonian) shared in the Estonian Women Investors group's Facebook page — where a tech entrepreneur in his 30s is complaining about the 'abnormally long' parental leave offered to mothers in Estonia. Of course, he completely ignored the fact that it’s not only meant for mothers, but for fathers too. 

For those who don’t know anything about the parental leave system in Estonia, here’s a brief overview: 

Expecting Estonian mothers are entitled to 140 days of fully paid pregnancy and maternity leave, which can be used starting from 70 days before their estimated due date.

After the 140 days, both the mother and father can exercise an additional 435 days of paid parental leave that can either be taken all at once by one parent or shared in parts before the child reaches 3 years of age (only one parent at a time can be on leave).

Furthermore, fathers have the right to 10 days of paid paternity leave within 2 months before the expected delivery date and two months after childbirth. 

Compared to the USA, where there’s no federally mandated policy to support new parents, you could say that we couldn’t really ask for a better environment. However the entrepreneur, who says he has a medium-sized company operating in the IT industry, sees things differently. 

Here are a few highlights from the article:

"A friend of mine works in the US and when he talks about our maternity leave, they are perplexed how is this even sustainable? To be completely honest, in my industry (tech) it’s a blocker.”

“The whole system is a disservice to women themselves. It’s not rare for women returning to work, to find themselves unable to resume their initial position because life has gone by and the situation in the company has changed. ”

"For a potential hire, a job offer that says you are a temporary replacement and won't be needed after 1.5 years is not attractive. I had a situation where a new person settled in so well that when my female colleague wanted to return after her maternity leave, there was no role for her anymore. Formally, I found her new responsibilities, but she saw that so much had changed and left.”

"Unconsciously, it reduces the willingness of business executives to hire young women. Recently, I had to choose between two talented developers – a woman and a man. I chose the latter. I know it sounds bad, but I did it because I knew there was no risk of him suddenly announcing that she'll stay at home with a child."

Sadly, his thoughts show how biased people still are — women are the ones to stay at home, raise children and penalized for doing so, while men ‘bring bread on the table’. 

I know there are many people that might agree and argue that it is "always" the mother who wants to stay at home. Let me ask you this: so what, what's your fear? The job won't get done? It seems really illogical to me, because if you’ve built a transparent and authentic workplace that cares for its people, then you invariably have:

1. a caring employee who would help you get ready for the time they transition to arguably the most important role of their lives (a parent). They can help you set the right expectations for the future too. Think about this: when a person decides to quit, they have to give a 1 month notice compared to soon-to-be-parents, who usually give at least 2–4 months notice.
2. a company that will continue growing so whenever a parent decides to return to work, s/he has a place to transition back to employment, re-learn the industry and continue to excel. 
3. a company that will support and help their colleagues even when their situation becomes different (they leave, change their profession etc.). Things constantly change in companies: people and their aspirations, as well as companies and their strategies. That's okay! And it should definitely not serve as a foundation to discriminate or judge someone. 
4. a company that people want to come work for. 

I would also challenge that entrepreneur to think of what would happen if the father decides to go on a long parental leave? He would probably say that it’s unlikely, because that’s not what men do!? 

It just makes me so angry when women are discriminated against when they become a parent. And men are not. This bias continues to fuel more problems, such as the gender pay gap. in Estonia, it's the largest in Europe! 

I find myself thinking about another side of the coin – time. We are always out of time and in a constant hurry. Hurry to work. Hurry to go to the gym. Hurry to make dinner for the family. Hurry to go on vacation. Hurry to get back from vacation. Hurry to read that article. Hurry to get that promotion. Hurry to be better than anyone else. Hurry to be successful. 

We often equate success with more money. And assume money will buy us more time. Sometimes, perhaps. What if it doesn't happen? You continue racing until your dying breath and end up losing sight of things that actually matters— such as spending meaningful time with your loved ones. One of the top 5 regrets people have at the end of their lives is spending too much time working, and not enough time with their family.

The entrepreneur in the article might be in a hurry to complete a project or beat a nasty business competitor…But what he fails to realise is that it boils down to setting right expectations and motivations. Communicate, solve problems, take responsibility, and adapt to what life throws at you. That's what entrepreneurship is all about anyway. Complaining about our parental policies and rights does not help.

I am considered to be a successful tech entrepreneur from Estonia. I have been awarded the Young Entrepreneur of the Year title, along with that of the Woman of the Year. My company Testlio is growing and is profitable. We serve some of the biggest companies in the world (Expedia, Microsoft, CBS etc.). Since the beginning we’ve been a very diverse company, with 50% of our leadership team and 40% of the company as a whole being women. Of our 65 employees, we are from 9 different countries of origin. We have many mothers (me being one of them), fathers, and soon to be parents at the company. And we’ve never been more successful than we are today.

It’s so sad that people are discriminated against simply for deciding to spend time with their children. Why work at all and contribute to society if you don't value family. What's the point then? 

What I’ve learned during my career is that when people passionately do what they love, they’ll continue learning and educating themselves. And if they decide to be away from work for just a fraction of their lives, they’ll still be able to continue from where they left off, and even be better than ever. Think about it — 3 years of a 50-year career is only 6%.

Even from a business standpoint, the cost of hiring a new employee is actually higher than re-training a returning employee.

A very close family member of mine had a work break of more than 3 years. After 10 years of uninterrupted employment, she decided to go on parental leave as she welcomed her 1st, and shortly after, 2nd child. She then went back to work, and she's a rock star at her current workplace! 

Another example from Testlio this time – one of our employees who is a father recently returned from his paternity leave. He had no trouble acclimating back. He told me the time away was invaluable to him as he got to bond with his child. It didn't make him feel less masculine, on the contrary he felt more fully human.

These are just two of the many positive examples I can give. I really feel parenthood is in many ways akin to project management, and a skillful project manager knows exactly what's needed to get the job done, so a working parent can definitely be an asset!

To sum up, I really want to stress that it’s both mothers and fathers who have the right to take care of their children. People have to do what feels right for them and they should never be discriminated against or penalized for who they are or the decisions they make. It’s time to respect that instead of making an issue out of it. It’s not necessary. It does not help anyone. 

Thankfully, there are plenty of companies out there (including Testlio!) that foster a welcoming, transparent, inclusive, and supportive work environment where maternal or paternity leave is not something that's frowned upon, but celebrated. 

1.5 years is just a blip in the grand scheme of things. If you’re a parent in Estonia, I'd say feel free to embrace it. Yes, getting back to work can be difficult. However, if you're capable to learn, you will be okay. In today's world, learning and retraining is something that needs to be done regularly within the workplace. Jobs don't last for 10+ years anymore. This is true whether you are on maternity/paternity leave or not.

Thanks for reading and thank you my dear colleagues who helped me review the article! For more of my stories, follow me on Instagram and Facebook.

Want to join Testlio? Check us out at testlio.com/jobs.