Microaggressions in the Workplace: Recognize, Address, and Rise Above

Once upon a time (many moons back), I had a boss who seemed to have earned a PhD in microaggressions. This wasn’t your run-of-the-mill management qualification; no, this was a self-accredited degree in delivering tiny, almost imperceptible barbs that somehow left you questioning every career choice you’d ever made. His comments were like a masterclass in the “It’s Not What You Say, But How You Say It” category, which can feel like stepping on a small tack repeatedly – just enough to hurt but not enough to see coming. And the kicker? He genuinely seemed oblivious to his actions.

For example, when complimenting my performance, he’d say, “It’s so great you’re doing well, especially considering your background.” (Background? I’d like to believe that includes ‘remarkably qualified and competent.’) Or the classic “Wow, you’re surprisingly articulate,” said with wide eyes that managed to convey he’d been expecting me to stumble over my words. By the time I left the room, I’d somehow felt both praised and slapped... So confusing!

What Are Microaggressions, Really?

Microaggressions are those seemingly innocent comments or behaviors that carry an undercurrent of bias, stereotype, or judgment. They’re the small jabs, often unintentional, that make someone feel diminished, stereotyped, or out of place. They come in various forms, from backhanded compliments to sarcasm disguised as humor.

Examples of Microaggressions in the Workplace

Here’s a look at some of the subtle ways microaggressions can manifest:

1. Backhanded Compliments: “You’re so organized for a creative type!” or “Wow, you’re very calm for someone in that department.” These remarks reinforce stereotypes, suggesting that certain traits don’t “fit” with certain roles.
2. Assumptions Based on Age: Comments like “You’re too young to know that” or “Are you sure you’re up for this?” subtly suggest that competence or experience is lacking, simply based on age.
3. Cultural Stereotyping: “You must be good at math” or “You don’t act like you’re from insert city or country.” These comments imply that people should fit within certain cultural or racial stereotypes.
4. Assumptions About Personal Choices: “Oh, you don’t have kids? You must have so much free time!” or “You’re married? That’s surprising.” These statements project personal values or judgments onto someone else’s lifestyle.
5. Tokenism in Assignments or Praise: Singling someone out as the “strong female voice” or the “diverse perspective” can make an individual feel tokenized rather than valued for their contributions.
6. Dismissive Sarcasm: Sarcasm can cut particularly deep, like “Oh, of course you would have that opinion” or “Well, someone thinks they’re fancy.” The comment pretends to be lighthearted but subtly dismisses someone’s ideas or qualities.
7. Condescending Praise via Sarcasm: “Nice job! Didn’t expect that from you!” implies low expectations and taints the compliment.
8. Undermining Tone: “Oh, so you’re finally ready to present?” suggests that the person is behind or struggling, even if the comment is framed as humor.

These microaggressions may seem minor in isolation, but when they happen repeatedly, they build up. Over time, they can erode trust, self-confidence, and even one’s sense of belonging at work.

The Risks of Ignoring Microaggressions

Ignoring microaggressions is like ignoring a leak in a boat – it may seem harmless at first, but over time, it can sink the entire vessel. In a workplace setting, tolerating these behaviors can lead to:

• Increased Turnover: Employees don’t want to stay in an environment that erodes their self-worth. Talented individuals will seek workplaces that treat them with respect and empathy.
• Decreased Collaboration and Trust: When microaggressions go unchecked, trust within the team suffers, and people are less likely to communicate openly or work well together.
• Reduced Innovation and Engagement: Individuals who feel stereotyped or belittled are less inclined to speak up, propose ideas, or engage fully with their work.

As I emphasize in my book, 360° IMPACT, fostering a sense of belonging, purpose, and connection in the workplace is essential for morale, productivity, and growth. Microaggressions undermine these values, creating an environment where people feel unappreciated or unseen.

Addressing Microaggressions with Empathy and Kindness

When it comes to handling microaggressions, empathy and kindness are key. Most people who make these comments aren’t trying to be hurtful; they’re simply unaware of the impact of their words. Here’s how to address microaggressions constructively:

1. Assume Positive Intent – Until Proven Otherwise: Start by assuming the person might not realize the effect of their comment. This mindset allows for a more open, productive conversation.
2. Use Clear, Open Communication: When a comment feels off, express how it made you feel without assigning blame. For example, “I felt surprised when you said I was articulate – it made me wonder if you had a different expectation.”
3. Be Ready to Educate: Often, people genuinely don’t understand why their comments are harmful. A calm explanation can go a long way. For example, “When you asked where I’m ‘really from,’ it made me feel like I don’t belong here, even though I’m from here just like anyone else.”
4. Stay Kind but Firm: The goal is not to shame the person but to create awareness. Framing your feedback with kindness encourages understanding, while firmness reinforces the importance of respect.

Moving Toward a Culture of Respect

Imagine a workplace where kindness, empathy, and open communication are more than ideals – they’re everyday practices. In a space where people feel comfortable addressing and discussing microaggressions, everyone can bring their authentic selves to work, fostering trust, innovation, and joy.

Here’s to creating more of that and, hopefully, fewer PhDs in microaggressions along the way!

Schedule a Discovery Call to discuss how coaching can help you and your team unlock full potential, lead with passion and impact!