Mohicans and Goodbyes

A few days back, I said goodbye to my trusted co-worker who “retired” from BORN to take a well-earned break. Naganathan “Naga” Subramanian was our head of human resources. He hired thousands of people for us by displaying the qualities he possessed – integrity, authenticity, and genuine interest in the welfare of his co-workers. As a farewell gift I wanted to buy him something that would represent him, and our association, well. I finally found it in a crystal elephant from Swarovski. I bought the gift and just when I about to leave the shop I went back and bought another.

An elephant is strong, has no natural predator, is self-assured, stands tall, does not mess with anyone and has an epic memory. It is a beast you can sit on and look farther into the jungle around you to make better decisions on your path forward. That was Naga to me (the first elephant). But Naga had a quality that was remarkable – he was able to project his principles onto and into many BORNies and leave a bit of his ethos, caring spirit, and good-outcome habit in them. Culture in a company is, after all, competence plus habit. So, the second elephant was to commemorate the reflection of his work ethic in BORNies.

I did not hesitate in letting him go when he told me, “I woke up after much reflection and realized my job here was done”. When a boss hears that from someone there is only one option – support the person fully, do not give them doubt or hesitation. So as much as I was inclined to tell him why he could not leave us, I had to let him go to his next great adventure, within and without. All of us at BORN are happy for him because he did more than we hoped he would do for us.

So, here’s a toast to my fellow journeyman who made my ride at BORN a memorable one.

That brings me to the second farewell, but a sad one.

The last of the Mohicans, the last of his family, Subramanyam Chennakeshu, my dad, quietly passed on to the next world. I wrote about him in a prior post. At 97 ½, he was just skin and bone but with a prodigious mind that was young to the very last day. His last days were made comfortable thanks to my loving sister who is an angel on this earth and his dearest companion for 65+ years, my mom. 

An award-winning air force officer who then became one of the architects of the aerospace establishment in India, he led a quiet, simple, hard-working life. He was well traveled and well read.

He had his paws on the HF24 (Marut), Gnat (Ajeet), Pushpak, Krishak, Mig21, Mirage 300 and a host of other planes. The airmen who trained how to fly, the farmers who were helped when planes sprayed insecticides across their farms, pilots who kept the Indian skies safe and designers who worked in the IAF’s indigenous helicopters and aircrafts won’t remember this man, but they unknowingly and unwittingly would have appreciated his work, because it made their lives better and safer.  

I remember him taking me to a sports shop to buy a hockey stick and I picked one that cost INR 75, a fortune 50 years ago. I heard my father ask what some other sticks cost and the salesman said INR 25. Somehow, I had picked the priciest one. When my dad was at the cashier with the outrageously costly stick, I asked him to get me the INR 25 stick. After a short discussion he agreed, even if reluctantly. The moral of this story is not to say that I was a thoughtful kid who knew his father had limited means, or his emphasize his generosity, but to say that he brought us up well – all three of his imperfect kids grew up with a sense of proportion, bereft of entitlement, and with a firm grasp of the value of money.

He had many short sayings that were simultaneously cute and profound. I have passed many of these on to my BORNies, so you won’t be surprised to know they are pictured framed slogans in some of our offices –

The silence of greatness is humility.

Every day is a gift from God. Treat it as you would a gift.             

Respect is mandatory, friendship is optional.

Or a more recent one, “Mourn the loss of a child, a young human, but celebrate the passing of someone who has lived a long and happy life”.

His quirks (fear of dentists, intermittent fasting), love for his giant, heavy motorbike and his odd sense of humor made him human and “flawed”, like all of us, or frankly he could have passed off as a living god.

Like many in his generation, he will quietly enter the slipstream of forgotten heroes only to find adequate compensation in the afterlife from the abundance of love and affection from his friends and family in whose minds he will always be remembered.

His keen intellect, abundant kindness, calm spirit, and enormous generosity gently conspired to make him the perfect dad, dependable son, helpful brother, faithful husband, and loyal friend.

We two brothers knew his favorite was my sister - unequivocally, but he did what all parents do. They say, “I love all my kids equally”. Sometimes he would quietly say, out of earshot from anyone else, that I was his favorite kid. The point I am making is that when a human hears something like that it kindles a love so deep that it lasts forever. Every human wants to be accepted and special, and being a favorite crystallizes the one thing everyone wants – a spiritual bond that is unbreakable.

I love trekking and seeing as much of the world as I can as did my father. I had told him of a recent epic journey that had taken me to London, Barcelona, Pune, Chennai, Bangalore and Singapore covering 28,000 miles in just one month. On Sat, March 18, 2023 at 11:22 PM he wrote his last mail to me: 

“I imagine travelling around the globe with you. It would be great seeing so many new places with you.

With love,

Keshu”

I cannot tell you what that mail means to me, but I do not have to - you know.

One lifetime with this man can never be enough. When my days on earth are over, I hope to cross the rainbow bridge and meet him on the other side and travel the world unseen, with him again.

Here’s to you dad,

Onwards. Upwards. 

Your fearless follower.