A Matter of Perception - My Ketchup and Mustard Sandwich

Sometimes we have flashes of memories for no particular reason. I’ve come to understand they do happen for a reason. It’s to remind us of what we need to remember in the “now” to help us keep moving forward. 

Yesterday, I was making a sandwich and as I squirted the yellow mustard onto my bread, I thought of making a ketchup and mustard sandwich as a teenager. Not that I particularly loved those two things, but there was nothing else in the trailer to put between the bread. It was my Mom, two brothers, and myself with very little money for groceries. I vaguely remember special meals like giant meatballs and think perhaps those occasions were on my Mom’s payday. 

The story goes that Dad left her for a much younger woman and moved away. He paid for the trailer but Mom had to pay the lot rent, utilities, and somehow clothe three teenagers working as a clerk in a dress store. Of course, all of us worked part-time as soon as we could to help make ends meet. Prior to the trailer adventure, I lived a pretty comfortable life… nice house, country club swimming with friends, I wanted a canopy bed and got one, I wanted a poodle and got one. I was pretty spoiled as the only girl and only granddaughter.

Then the swift change in reality took place. I had no control and all in all adapted pretty well.

This is NOT a "wooisme" story. It’s about knowing where I came from and understanding how the change made me a better person. 

I had a client once say “you’ve had a cush life so how can you understand?”

That’s the problem with judging others. You don’t know their back story, but assume things to give you permission to be less than you could be.

I forget just how much I’ve overcome to be where I am. I took this moment to remember I am not just a survivor, I’ve accomplished a lot in my life regardless of circumstances. I’ve made some really good choices and need to focus more on those rather than ones I might want to change.

Healing is a choice. Loving “in spite of” is a choice. Learning is a choice.

Don’t forget that what you see is your perception of things. When we want to stay stuck and be bitter, we make up our own stories about others or ourselves, having no idea what Truth really is. Consider that there is no good or bad, just experiences that help us mold into the person we choose to become. We choose how we frame an experience.

I chose to see the benefit in my change of circumstances. I was no longer spoiled and had to develop skills I didn’t need before. I was exposed to a part of society that was surviving in a different way, yet caring and giving… more so than I knew before.

It helped me become who I am today and I am grateful in a strange way for having eaten ketchup and mustard sandwiches.