Nothings about taking a sabbatical

“Breathe. Just breathe and sit.” — That is a great line, I thought. 

Two weeks into the sabbatical I took a picture of the quote printed in big letters on the wall of the Seamus Heaney exhibition and sent it to a friend who had said those exact words to me some months before. I thought about how great that line was as I walked a 24km a day, before the gym, after a cycle, and again in between a run and a hill. That is such a great line, I thought, so wise. 

I was like a sponge in the lead up to this sabbatical trying to get any advice I could. In return from the many stories shared with me, I’ll share mine with you as I pass the half way point. 

I give to you what was given to me when a friend sent me the link to “The Happy Film”. In it, a multi grammy award winning creative director takes a 3 month sabbatical to find happiness. He ends up chasing love and comes out with neither happiness nor love. A warning, the friend said, happiness is not outside of you. 

A Foundation

I didn’t know how to take my sabbatical, but I had a period like this around 2018 when my job in BOI changed suddenly, without warning, and my days became free of work and purpose. 

That period was pretty painful but in retrospect phenomenal as it gave me 3 things that laid a foundation — the wheel of life, defining my values, and journalling. It also gave me Grow Remote and I could never have predicted that at the time. 

Digging deep creates magic. That much I know for sure. As Grow Remote hit its 5th birthday this September, I was reminded of the power of the universe, the need to believe and let go. GR’s biggest moments happened out of the blue, in flow. 

Progress

Some people say you shouldn’t plan and other people say you shouldn’t waste time. So, I took a line down the middle and went for some indication of progress by booking a Dexa Scan, hiring a PT and nutritionist and went to work. For me, fitness is a huge part of happiness, and I wanted to use this time to focus on learning things that will apply for life. My body will always be with me, so it seemed practical. 

I had a morning routine locked in - journal, yoga, exercise. After that the wheel of life/goal setting helped to fill the days, which never once seemed to be quiet. I set health goals and hit them. I didn't have a plan, but I did have my own little Meitheal and what I call the credits to phase one:

Theme Music: Absolutely everything by Kishi Bashi. (Thanks, Joan)

Books: The Seat of the Soul, Finding Your Own North Star, The Surrender Experiment (Thanks Andreea, Kenny)

People: Jonathan Byrne in Crossfit Limitless, Aidan Mackey on nutrition, Kenny Ryan on Yoga, Sue Redmond on meditation. 

Words: Seamus Heaney with two things. “Breathe, just sit and breathe” and the poem, Scaffolding. (Thanks Andreea, William)

Focusing on health was practical and useful yes, but digging deep? No.

Half way through as I was on a long walk through the woods and a friend called. “What is the question though? Why did you start this? Why are you adding things in? Take things out.”

A Path Forward

I remembered why I started it and the first call with my chair John. There was no reason for needing a break (beyond regular founder burn out, which I'm used to). It was a pull more than a push, I told him. I didn't know what it was, but I needed to follow it.

So I took the hint from that call and 16 days ago decided I would create two phases to the sabbatical — originally ‘body & mind’ and now ‘body and soul’. Cliché I know.

But I continued to move and work and visit friends and family and date. So much so that I continued to avoid sitting. Luckily for me, I acquired achilles tendonopathy. I can’t run, can just walk a regular amount, and the gym is curtailed. I am left to breathe. Just breathe and sit. 

I'll keep the 3 tools from the first m̶i̶d̶l̶i̶f̶e̶ ̶c̶r̶i̶s̶i̶s̶ sabbatical, keep the morning routine from phase one, and add in....nothing.

So actually, I just realised that I am not writing this to help you if you ever take a sabbatical, but rather to distract myself once again. As I head into the next phase of following my nose and fine tuning my instincts, I would really love to hear your sabbatical stories if you have them.

I might even anonymously compile them in another attempt "help another founder" and avoid sitting.