One Ridiculously Easy Way to Build Trust is to Stop Doing This!

Want to be Respected as a Leader? Avoid the platitude trap.

Boardroom Bingo! Have you ever played it? Sitting around at another interminable boardroom meeting as a guest and observer, I was having fun checking off each sad buzzword. I had gotten three so far and we were only a few minutes in.

Can you guess what they were? My poor ears were being bombarded: 

Think outside the box!

Go the extra mile!

And

We’re all in this together!

I know that sometimes these sentences just pop out of our mouths. They are gap fillers for when we feel like we need to say something good and positive but can’t think of what.

Here’s the big problem with that.

They are not truly meant! They are often empty words people have heard before. They can even be triggering to employees who have had past bosses abuse these meaningless platitudes. They are not seen as authentic, and they incite distrust and even fear.

So, with one well-meaning but unthinking platitude, you can turn your audience off, disengage them, and shut them down. Just like that.

These seemingly harmless phrases often mask deeper issues within organizational culture and leadership styles. Why do they persist, and most importantly, how can we avoid their trap?

You can start by watching out for some of the most commonly used ones and striking them from your mind:

1. "We're a family here." This heartwarming sentiment can quickly turn sour when it becomes a guise for exploitation or an excuse for dysfunctional behavior. After all, some families can be quite toxic too. 

For example, when layoffs loom, the "family" disbands faster than a house of cards, leaving employees feeling betrayed and disposable.

Spot it by examining whether genuine care and support exist beyond superficial camaraderie. Avoid falling into this trap by fostering a culture of accountability and mutual respect, rather than relying on familial ties to mask shortcomings.

Rather say: “We want to support each of you as best we can. Let’s chat about what you each need to do your job better.” This is a great opening to use questioning and reflection. My inclusion prompts work well here.

2. "Failure is not an option." While meant to inspire perseverance, this platitude often stifles innovation and breeds fear of taking risks. It smacks of a blame culture that punishes mistakes. Employees tend to shut down, hide errors, and won’t risk anything new or outside of the norm. A lot of great new ideas get lost and learning opportunities too. 

Encourage a mindset shift by emphasizing the importance of catching, learning, and pivoting from mistakes as early as possible.  Be solution-oriented not person-oriented when dealing with the mistake. 

Rather say: “Let’s plan for potential problems and brainstorm contingencies. Can anyone share when they experienced an issue like this one…” or “What is the outcome we need to minimize the problem and take the most from this.”

3. "It is what it is." This fatalistic phrase may seem like a nod to acceptance, but it can also signal resignation in the face of challenges. It can be a cop-out to avoid addressing underlying issues or implementing meaningful change. 

Rather say: “Let’s discuss the issues and what we can each do about them.” Or ask, “How can we do this better?”

4. "Work smarter, not harder." While efficiency is undoubtedly important, this platitude can easily devolve into micromanagement or an excuse to cut corners. Watch for signs of burnout or unrealistic expectations disguised as productivity hacks. Encourage a balance between working smart and maintaining well-being, prioritizing sustainable practices over quick fixes.

Rather say: “How can we be more effective with xyz? What will that take? What knowledge or resources do we need to make this easier?”

5. "Let's touch base offline." While intended to streamline communication, this vague invitation often wastes time and misalignment. Endless "offline" meetings can lead to a lack of accountability and a disconnect between teams, hindering collaboration and progress. Be wary of using it as a placeholder for addressing important issues or making decisions. It’s fine for personal or private issues, but even then, it’s best to schedule that chat ASAP.

Rather say: “I would like to address that with you later. Can we do that (insert schedule)?”

Why do leaders say these things?

I’ve found it’s often wishful thinking on the part of the boss. Take that first platitude, “We’re a family here.” This is the culture the boss wants to create, so they think it will happen if they say it enough. Culture change is not that easy. Whenever a boss says something like this, employees think he’s delusional at best or lying at worst. 

In a world saturated with many empty words, authentic leadership shines brightest. People need genuine communication, inclusive cultures, and psychological safety to operate at their best. 

Great leadership is rooted in honesty, empathy, and meaningful action. And your words underline your mindset, so ditch empty, useless platitudes. 

Keep it real!

What are the worst workplace platitudes you have heard? Message me with your answers by hitting reply to this, I'd love to know.

Maximize your leadership potential today! Dive into the secrets of your brain's productivity and lead with clarity. Subscribe to our newsletter for more insights.

Until next time.

Mike