The Power is in the Choice
Aakash Waghmare
State Government Approved Valuator, Advisor, Estimator, Builder and Developer For Real Estate Industry
Continue from the last article, “No I’ll not stand for a moment”
Next week in the very morning, Rumesh called me and asked me for my time. I replied yes to him on Saturday. We both met at the cafeteria that day.
Rumesh was looking very excited to tell me about his progress, he did what I said earlier last week to him.
We both ordered the coffee and we started our convo.
I said, ‘So, Rumesh, how was your week?”
Rumesh: ‘It was great. I made it possible for myself with the Blueprints you’ve given me last week, and I am now feeling, I will make it possible.’
I said: ‘good’
He: ‘But, Aakash, I am having a problem in my life. People are still taunting, laughing, and suggesting good and bad. Sometimes, I feel, I am not going to make it happen. How can I avoid these other people's words?”
I said: ‘That’s really very simple Rumesh’
He: ‘How?’
I: ‘you just have to SET your RULES of life’
He: ‘it means?’
I: ‘It means, you’ve to first understand what is fat to you again’
He: ‘I did not get that?’
I: ‘Look at there Rumesh, The cafeteria at which we’re sitting has a manager. He’s having waiter, and counter and a product to show’
Rumesh nodded in yes.
I continued my talk and said, ‘Don’t you think that this cafeteria has its rules & regulations, and code of conduct, which tells the manager, waiter, and that table showcasing the product range of this cafeteria, how to work, how to behave, how to manage, how to serve, how to showcase, how to conduct every operation available here?”
Rumesh again nodded IN YES.
I: ‘And do you see the owner of the cafeteria here?”
He said: ‘NO’
I: ‘Don’t you then see that Owner has given the rules to the cafeteria, sleeping at his home right now maybe, and enjoying the perks out of it?’
He: ‘Yes’
I: ‘And don’t you see that the government has SET the rules to this cafeteria on its operation and on its quality of product and every type of operation?’
He: ‘Yes, but what’s the point here?”
I: ‘The point is, Whoever set the rules, the control’s the remain’
Whoever SET the rules of his life, controls his every moment of life.
Now, Rumesh, When I didn’t have an idea of this type of secrete, I did not have any rules in my life. I was using just dialogues from movies, books, seminars, and all. I was getting fascinated by its power and beauty in the FIRST State of Mind.
He talks in the middle and asked, ‘What is the FIRST state of mind’
I: ‘Our Mind works on external beauty and attractiveness in the first place or you can say in the first impression.
You can’t become a lover of Dirty Insects, and Ugly looking living beings with a first impression.
But, you’ll love them later, because they too are living creatures.
Here Our mind works in 2 different states.
First is beauty and attractive nature.
Second is Inner acceptance of Freedom and love of every creature and non-living thing.
First comes from our real perception of beauty and ugliness. The second comes from Inner Love.
When you saw any person, you first work with the ‘FIRST’ type of state. You decide on a person based on his outer look. Then you think about the inner look.
Don’t you get that, this is the main reason for a big number of divorces in relationships?
Rumesh nodded and said, ‘YES’
The same rule applies to Dialogues.
When you read or listen to any dialogue, you’ll get fascinated with its power or its influence.
The same happens to you, when you watch any motivation video, read any book or listen to any lecture, that I am giving you right now.
Rumesh laughed, and I said: ‘Let’s go to take a walk’
It was wonderful nature out there. The clean and clear air was waving, we both took long breaths and set ourselves in a relaxed condition of mind.
We started walking towards our homes.
Rumesh said: ‘So what happens to you before setting rules of life’
I said: ‘When I was obsessed with the dialogues given by real people, I was not even looking for its inner reality'
He: ‘And what was that inner reality?”
I: ‘The inner reality is, that dialogues didn’t come from my experiences.’
Hence, they were worthless to me. They were ridiculous for me, They were nothing for me more than just outside motivation. And I really don’t want any outside motivation more than Internal Burning Desire’
We’ll talk about How I made it possible for myself to Increase Internal Burning Desire. But for now, let’s talk about a little bit of motivation.
When, I did realize that, I do not have any meaning, feeling, and experience in that dialogues, and it was just mere motivation to me, I push myself to learn this.
When you get an Outside motivation, there are three kinds of people ready for it to use or apply.
The first type of people are ‘People who get fascinated by its beauty, power, and truth’. I was one of them.
The second type of people is, ‘People who didn’t have any meaning with motivation and they are flying in arrogance and ignorance in life’
The third type of people is, who read or listen to that dialogue, link it with any of their past experiences,s and realize it’s reality. They don’t get fascinated with it, they don’t get obsessed with it, and they don’t get any motivation out of it, they just realize it with their past experience and set their own rules of life.
Now Rumesh, When I had no rules in my life, Everyone was using my time, assigning their tasks to me and I was not able to refuse, everyone was suggesting to do this, and do that. Everyone seemed obsessed with my success, but, they were just trying to show me ‘They are Superior’ to me. And, obviously, it’s normal human nature.
Human wants to be superior in front of their KING too, hence, he’s missing the chance to learn the most important lessons of life.
Human wants to be superior in front of his MENTOR too, hence, he’s missing the chance to learn the most important lesson’s of life.
Because, the teacher teaches, and the student learns. When you become a teacher, in front of your teacher, it’s obvious that your teacher will become a student, and he’ll learn from you, not you’ll learn from him.
That’s the exact mistake people do always, hence, they suffer always.
Everyone in this entire world, if he is enough to understand his life and goals, he’s master at his ability, then age doesn’t matter.
If a person is just 14 years old and is able to understand the life and direction, are master at his life.
Because, according to nature, he’s already having 14 years of experience.
If we reduce the first formative 10 years, still, he’s having 4 years of experience in his life, on which, he can start his life.
What he needs to do in it is, learn from great leaders, experience the same in his past, get that feeling and that’s it.
You are ready to make a change.
When I had lacking the rules of my life, I didn’t realize, How I am wasting my time.
People were calling me whenever they want, they are asking for my help whenever they want and I wasn’t able to say NO to them.
Sooner and later, I started to get the feeling of ‘I am free right now, hence, I can spend my time’
That feeling was itself a sign of Slavery.
I became the slave of other people's suggestions and tasks.
I didn’t realize it until I don’t get encountered it.
Life teaches people with worst situations, and test peoples in good situations. Whoever understand the concept, will rule his life.
I was a slave to them.
I started getting the feelings of ‘What to do now.
I started wasting more time because no one was there to assign me my tasks.
I was alone. And I wasn’t having a choice but to do any work.
I was in eagerness to get that suggestions and jobs, from others.
I was helpless, directionless, task less, and a slave of others.
Until, One day, when I realized the power of choices.
The Power of Choice
Whoever in this world have the choice, controls the situation, and rule the world.
When a girl has more than 1 proposal to select her life partner, she will show her attitude, because, now she can select any of her choices. And I am sure, that boys will do whatever she will told them to do.
When a customer has the choice to select the product or which shop to go to, the owner and manager of the company will wait for the situation to happen.
The same was true for me.
When I was directionless, I did not have many choices to select from. Hence, others were controlling my life, my decisions, my capacity, and everything I can think about.
Until one day, a few years back, I was talking to my friend. He was a self-motivated, blessed personality.
I told him to assign me some work, because, I didn’t have any.
He asked me: ‘Aakash, why don’t you have any work in your life? Why do you need me to assign you a task? Why don’t you fix any goal in your life and do that work?”
I Said: ‘Well, I am not able to do such. I am afraid of getting failure. I don’t think I will thrive in the world, I don’t think I will make it possible for me. I want any kind of job in my life. Do you have such?”
He said: ‘No, I do not have any such. But, I have a question. If you do not have the ability to choose your goal, the ability to select your desired life, then, why are you living being a slave? Why are you not working towards getting that ability? Why are you not making it possible?”
I didn’t reply to any of the questions he asked me. But I asked the same questions again to me. Then, whatever you found me is a self-motivated person with a more exact goal in his life. Now, I have my choices to select from.
But when you started to grow in your life, another jealous person will come to you to demotivate you. Because of the nature of humans. They do not want anyone superior to themselves, more successful than themselves, powerful than themselves.
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When I became able to have my direction in my life, I started focusing on it.
Those people, who were suggesting me and giving me work to do their work, now get my ignorance. I didn’t know at that time, how to avoid them.
They started making jokes, laughing, and taunts on me, on ‘I am one of the busiest people in the world’ in the public places, and they try their hard, to take me down to listen to them, so that, I remain their servant always.
They try to make me shame myself.
They try to give me a perception of, how they are giving me good work to do. How they are so merciful. How they are so kind to me.
They started creating a scarcity of remaining positions, and they can shift to others.
And do you know, who those people are?
They were my relatives, more than, others.
Because I was their slave, they don’t want to lose such a slave.
I feel the loneliness again in my life.
I feel that I am not able to resist it.
I feel that, No, Please don’t do this to me.
But, whoever begs become a beggar.
I decided to take the charge of my life.
And ONE Day, with a depression to find a solution, I worried a lot, I cried about what to do and what not to do, and I sleep.
The Emerging Sun of Power
The next morning, I woke up and found, that I had something inside my brain.
My last night's dream was very much exciting and very much magical.
I was the KING in my dream.
I was ordering soldiers, and ministers of my kingdom.
In My dream, I felt that I am the one who is most powerful.
In that dream, I ordered Pradhan of my kingdom and asked him, ‘Hey Pradhan, how well is my kingdom?”
Pradhan said, ‘Maharaj, Your kingdom is running very well. Everyone has what they want in their life. They are having true freedom in their life. They are doing business, following their passion, and the Whole Kingdom is educated. People are living in peace.’
I get arrogant with these sentences.
I said, ‘Hmm... It means I am managing my kingdom very well’
Pradhan said: ‘Yes, Maharaj, you’re managing your kingdom very well. I must say, but...!’
I was amazed, and asked, ‘But what’
Pradhan said: ‘Maharaj, it’s true that you’re managing your kingdom, but, it’s more than this.’
I said: ‘Pradhan, what are you talking about?”
Pradhan said: ‘Maharaj, People are not following you. People are following the rules you’ve created.’
I said: ‘What?’
Pradhan said: ‘Yes, Maharaj. It’s the rules, the Constitution, your forefathers have created to manage this Kingdom, actually. You’re just a person who is managing it at a superior level to us. And also, it’s about us, who are considering the Constitution the final draft to live our life peacefully with humble security and prosperity.
End of the DREAM
I don’t know why I get that dream, but, it told me to create my own SET of Rules, The Own Constitution of OWN LIFE.
In the beginning, everyone faces the problem to follow the rules and constitution, but, when people joined the force to follow the rules, others started being afraid of it.
It’s the Rules, that run everything in this universe.
It’s the Rules, that manage everything.
It’s the Rules, that manage, What to do and what not to do in certain situations.
It’s the Rules, that tell, What to accept and What not to accept.
Now Rumesh, When I made it possible to assign the rules for my time, People started respecting it. Some of them try their hard to manipulate me, to force me, But, I never compromise myself to that set of rules.
My rule for the ‘time’ was, ‘I’ll spend every moment of my life being productive for my prosperity’
Now there are exceptions are allowed. Such as, Every nation has the courts, so they can manage the truth and wrong, so as, We’ve to have exceptions to manage.
My exception is like following;
First, I’ll spend my time with family if they need me, but not more than the cost of my single task. Exceptional to major problems.
Second, I’ll spend my time with urgency if the person is really going to return me something more than the valuable time I am spending on him, and only if, he’s having already settled value in my mind. Or he must have to be a person well known for his commitments.
I smiled at Rumesh and said, Now Rumesh, I am spending this moment on you because, You already have settled value in my mind, and you follow the commitment given to you last week
Third, I’ll spend my time if I am learning something valuable and directly related to my Goals.
Forth, I’ll spend my time if I am increasing my capacity that directly relates to my end goals.
Rumesh, these are my rules for spending time.
Background Pickup
Now Rumesh, when you do not have any set rules for your life, anyone, even anyone can come to you and can change your life. These changes can be good or bad. And most of the time, it will be bad. And you’ll not able to control it again.
I’ve felt it. I’ve experienced it, and I don’t want anyone again, to control my life, nor the destiny itself.
Suppose, if you do not have your set rules for spending money, how you’ll react when you get that money?
Rumesh said: ‘I’ll spend it like crazy”
I: Yes. When you’ve set rules for it, and when you strictly follow your own rules, you’ll be able to manage your money well. And then, money will not control you, you’ll control your money.
Rumesh: ‘But, Aakash, I am already having spending rules for money. And I know where to and how to spend it, or use it’
I: ‘Rumesh, What you’ll do if you get 10 million rupees right now in your hand?”
Rumesh: ‘I will purchase a car, house, land, and if remain, I’ll invest it for the future and/or in a business’
I: ‘And do you have any idea how much amount your house, car, land, business, or investing needs. And what are the types of it?’
He: ‘I don’t know yet. But I will learn it’
I: ‘There you go Rumesh. You do not have any idea of what to do with money. You have your wishes, not your goals. They are both different. Goals are like you know them exactly, and wishes do not need to be exact.’
You know your monthly spending in your house because it has set rules. You’re not going to spend more amount than required on your bills, or house expenses. Because it has its own rules. But what about the money that remains in your hand?
Rumesh said: ‘Hmm... You’re right. I’ve to set rules for whatever amount remains at the end
I: ‘What if Rumesh, you set rules as per the goals? What if you set your financial goals first, then make that extra money apart from house expenses to achieve it?’
Rumesh shows an energetic expression and said, ‘YES, This way I can manage myself to make an extra amount and spend it towards the goals and dreams easily’
I: ‘Now, you get that’
Here are Rumesh, some points on which, you must have to have your SET rules of life.
Before going to points, here are the 4 basic questions to ask for every point.
Question 1: What it is for you?
Question 2: What you’ll accept in it and what you’ll not accept in it?
Question 3: How you’re going to use it?
Question 4: How you’ll manage exceptions and how much time you’ll follow the exceptions.
Points are:
And you can add as many points as you want in your life if required. The above-said points are the most captured points by humans. They daily face these points in their life and yet, they do not have any idea of what to do with them or what not to do with them.
When you’ll set the rules of your life, make sure to follow the same for your whole life.
Do not ever compromise to it, because, if you compromise it even 1%, you’ll insult its capacity, and;
History bears witness to the reality that, The KING who ignored the rules of the King and Kingdom, destroys himself and his empire.
History bear witnessed to the reality that, The KING who ignored the rules of King and Kingdom, destroys himself and his empire.
That day Rumesh, I become King of my own Life.
I started accepting everything as per my set rules, I started working as per my set rules, I started living as my set rules, I started reacting as per set rules, and then, You can’t imagine, what Magic happens to me.
Rumesh said in excitement: What’s that?
I: I’ll tell you that later after you apply what you learned today.
But one thing I can share more with you.
The people who were taunting, lagging, and making jokes about me, never ever did any comments against me again. They never suggest me anything. Do you know why?
Because I’ve now my own Experienced Dialogue to put on their f* face (We both laugh at this). And I can explain it exponentially to them.
Hence, Whoever has the Choice, Controls the Situation.
Rumesh said: ‘And you put your dialogue again”
We both laugh again at it, and we go to our homes.
That day, Rumesh become more powerful than last week. Because he is now having the power to accept and reject what he wants.
He realized that he can accept and reject the taunts, and suggestions and he can either explain it to them or he can work as per his set rules of time to spend.
Whoever have the Choice, Controls the Situations.
A Lesson from The Psychology of Prosperity