The Power of Forgiveness

One of the most important values that you can teach your children is Forgiveness. The inability to forgive lies at the root of most negative emotions. When you practice forgiveness, when you freely let go, your children grow up with the ability to forgive as well. This saves them from years of unhappiness as the result of someone hurting them in some way, which will always happen.

My parents were adamant and inflexible. They had low self-esteem as a result of difficult Depression-era childhoods. As a result, once they had taken a position on any subject, however wrong, they could never back down and admit that they were wrong.

I resolved that when I had children, I would do exactly the opposite. From the time my daughter was born, if I shouted at her for any reason, I would always go to her and apologize. I would say, “I should not have shouted at you. I was wrong. Will you forgive me?”

When you raise children, they will make countless mistakes while they are growing up. Sometimes you will overreact. Unless you are a saint, this is almost impossible for you not to do. However, whenever you make a mistake with your child, you should have the courage and compassion to realize that destructive criticism from a parent is extremely painful to a child. Go and take it back. Apologize and ask your child for forgiveness. Even if the child has misbehaved, this does not justify reacting in a negative and hurtful way towards the child. Just say, “I apologize. Will you forgive me?”

And they always will. The minute you apologize and ask your children to forgive you for anything that you may have done to hurt them, you liberate them from feelings of negativity or inferiority. By taking it back, you allow them to be happy and confident once more.

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