The Q-Kids: Anything but Boring

By John R. Nocero and Andrea L. Bordonaro

JRN: I am going to challenge you a second here. Last week, you said ""boring" isn't a word that I can even let enter my vocabulary. In fact, that is a forbidden word both in my classroom and in my home. I don't believe in or know what boredom is like and I don't like hearing my kids and students use the expression. There is no reason that we should ever be bored. Make our own fun and keep ourselves busy - playing, organizing, cleaning, reading, writing, drawing, socializing, etc." but then you contradict yourself with ""learn to cherish down time and just "be" with ourselves..."

Isn't the second half of the statement, well, defining boredom?

I think people need to be more and not do anything, which people used to be good at, being boring. Boring is reliable. straight up old school oatmeal is boring. I'm talking the unflavored oats that are in the giant tub in your pantry. but you know what you get with them - a nutrient filled breakfast that keeps you filled for hours. Pushups are not sexy. They are very basic. But you know what you get with them, a jacked up, chest and aesethetically horseshoe triceps. sitting on the couch and just sitting is boring but you know what you get - a chance to recharge and let your brain not do anything. 

Quick Andrea, don't think about your phone. but you just did. don't let the dopamine rush intoxicate you but it is. Be a master of boredom and patience. The man who is bored and patient, is a master of everything else. Do you want to rethink your position on boredom? why or why not?

ALB: Nope, I actually strongly disagree that boredom equates with learning to cherish our down time and just "be" with ourselves. According to dictionary.com the definition of boredom is "the state of being bored; the feeling of being wearied by dullness, tedious repetition, etc." If I am enjoying time alone I definitely don't feel bored or wish that I had something better to do. I have worked for years to get out of the mindset that I constantly need to be physically doing something to make the most of my time. To rest, relax, and just meditate or just savor time alone without having a specific task in mind should bring a sense of contentment and joy, not boredom and feelings that I should be or want to be doing something else.

I find that when I don't work in set alone time, I feel more edgy, less patience, easily irritated, tired, etc than if I take some time to myself to just unwind at the end of every single day, regardless of how busy my schedule was all day and/or evening long. It's also like the difference between being "lonely" and being "alone." Lonely is yearning to not be one with yourself, but instead, wishing that someone was there with you, but "alone" could mean that I prefer to recharge and spend time by myself to be fulfilled at times. Both invoke very different human emotions and reactions, just like boredom and relaxing do. 

I wholeheartedly agree with your sentiments above about people needing to physically DO less and just BE, but for me, this has nothing to do with being bored. Oatmeal without flavoring is just a different taste than the ones with the fruit sugars in them, but I still wouldn't necessarily classify them as "boring." Same with push-ups, as they perhaps are the most fundamental exercise that produce great results - not making them fall under the label of boring either. I do work all the time to "just be" and not give in to my phone, its many notifications, etc. For instance, when I am with a good friend, my daughters, my parents, etc.

I put my phone aside and give them my full attention. When I am alone is when I tend to explore what relieves stress on me - scrolling on posts on Instagram and Facebook, playing Words with Friends, texting friends, looking at my old pics on my phone, sending/receiving emails, online shopping, etc. But there are times when I put my phone completely away and just listen to spa music covered up in a cozy blanket without any lights on except for the flicker of my fireplace...boredom is the furthest thing from my mind, honestly...