As I write, I am coming off a very special week. I just celebrated another birthday and it was my best birthday yet. I enjoyed all the festivities and being surrounded by the people that I love. Most of all, I was deeply touched by the countless well wishes and messages I received from people worldwide. It is truly humbling to know that my life and work continue to resonate with so many people in so many different parts of the world. This is normally the point in the year when I spend a lot of time reflecting on my life, experiences, and the journey that has brought me to this moment in my life. I hope these insights will provoke you to do deep introspection and ignite you to revolutionize your life!
- Reflection cannot be optional if you want to grow. When I talk about reflection, I can always sense the skepticism of some of the people in the room. Usually, this cynicism and pessimism come from individuals who lack self-awareness and self-accountability. From decades of lived experience, I can tell you that if you do not make reflection a priority in your life you will never grow. Do you realize that there are people that have never taken the time to reflect on their lives, their experiences or their choices? I know that this may be hard to believe. However, many people in the world have zero self-awareness. They are quick to identify what is wrong in everyone else's life. Yet these same individuals are blind to what is broken about their own lives. While I sound wise and insightful today, one of the main reasons that I have gained so much wisdom from life is because I take time regularly to reflect. I reflect on my wins, losses, trials, tribulations and even my greatest failures. If you never take the time to reflect you cannot grow. If you cannot grow you will live a miserable and meaningless existence.
- Reflection is a tool for learning who you really are. If you ask most people about who they are, they immediately start to tell you all the titles and positions that they hold. However, that is not the question that they are being asked. Why do we often do this? Most people do this because they are suffering from an identity crisis. Through my work with leaders all around the world, I am always amazed at how leaders can deliver masterful presentations but they cannot articulate who they are and what matters to them. One of the reasons I spend so much time reflecting is because it became a tool for learning who I truly am. The more time I devoted to reflection the more I learned my likes, dislikes, preferences, and most important priorities. In this social media driven culture, we can tell you what is going on in everyone else's life but we cannot communicate what is going on in our inner world. To know yourself, you first have to learn to like yourself, then love yourself before you can ever lead yourself and effectively lead others. If you never take the time to learn who you are, you will never be empowered to help others uncover their true identity and own their power.
- Reflection will shift your paradigm about what is possible for your life. Many people look at my relationship constellation and my vast network today and they are left speechless. However, what most people fail to understand is that I was one of the most shy, timid, and insecure people you could ever meet. I barely felt comfortable introducing myself to other people and I was almost terrified to have a conversation with them. So I am sure you are wondering how I went from a shy and timid person to a courageous leader with the ability to connect with people on a deep level. I will not lie to you and say that this happened overnight. On the other hand, I will say that it happened over time. As I devoted more time to reflection, it started to affect the way I thought about myself. Moreover, reflection changed my perception of what was possible for my life. Now my influence has grown tremendously and my life and work has profoundly impacted people all over the world. You need to spend time reflecting on your life often. Reflection forces you to examine the decisions you are making, to discern your true motives and intentions and assess where you are in accordance to your life plan or vision. Most people are afraid to reflect because it brings up feelings of regret. So many people fail to reflect because it will require them to take responsibility for the lack of results in their lives.
- Reflection will compel you to live in pursuit of the next best version of yourself. I may be the only person that has ever noticed this. However, have you ever noticed that right on the heels of your greatest achievement people are already asking you what you are going to do next? Few people will tell you congratulations and even fewer people will tell you that they are proud of you. In reality, you will discover that many people envy you and they are in an imaginary competition with you. One of the reasons reflection is so important to me is because it takes me out of the prison of other's opinions and expectations. Reflection illuminates both the best parts of me and the broken parts of me. Reflection empowers me to see that I do not have to constantly live in pursuit of something new or the pressure of what is next. Reflection gives me the space to grow and to become the next best version of myself. I want you to listen to me very carefully. Reflection has caused me to slow down, enjoy the journey, and savor the precious moments in my life. You are not in competition with anyone and you have the freedom to carve your own path. Reflection has given me the wisdom to get out of my own way and give up the things that weigh me down. Reflection is an invitation to embrace the next best version of yourself and the greatest expression of who God created you to be.
