SELF-LEADERSHIP....before we can conquer the world, we must first conquer the self

The most difficult person we will ever have to lead is ourselves. So important is Self-Leadership that the Bible mentions the word self-control 174 times and the word discipline 169 times. (Deb Preston, Self-Control in the Bible)

The apostle Paul tells of the high priority he placed on Self-Leadership in his first letter to the Corinthians where he writes, “Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. EVERY athlete exercises self-control in ALL things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we, an imperishable. So, I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. But I DISCIPLINE MY BODY AND KEEP IT UNDER CONTROL, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.”  1 Corinthians 9:24-27

Paul wrote to Titus urging him to tell the younger men to be self-controlled. Titus 2:6 So important is self-control that it is listed as one of the fruits of the Holy Spirit. Galations 5:23 

One of the important themes in Peter’s first letter is that of self-control. On three occasions he urges his readers to be self-controlled. 1:13 “Therefore prepare your mind for action. Be SELF-CONTROLLED. Set your hope fully on the grace to be given when Jesus Christ is revealed.” 4:7 “The end of all things is near. Therefore, be clear minded and SELF-CONTROLLED so that you can pray.” 5:8 “Be SELF-CONTROLLED and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him.”

In summary, Peter says SELF-CONTROL is of primary importance to be able to focus on:-

·   the coming of Jesus

·   a life of prayer

·   a life of victory in spiritual warfare

It is impossible to live a victorious Christian life without self-control, so much so that Solomon wrote that “the person without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls.”  Proverbs 25:28

In his classic book, SPIRITUAL LEADERSHIP, J. Oswald Sanders lists discipline as the first quality of importance in his chapter on Essential Qualities of Leadership. Speaking from experience, he has many valuable insights for those who would aspire to leadership. “Without the essential quality of discipline, all other gifts remain as dwarfs; they cannot grow. Before we can conquer the world, we must first conquer the self. A leader is a person who has learned to obey a discipline imposed from without and has then taken on a more vigorous discipline from within. Those who rebel against authority and scorn self-discipline – who shirk the rigors and turn from the sacrifices – DO NOT QUALIFY TO LEAD. Many who drop out of ministry are sufficiently gifted, but have large areas of life floating free form the Holy Spirit’s control. Lazy and disorganised people never rise to true leadership. Many who aspire to leadership fail because they have never learned to follow….. Discipline in early life, which is prepared to make sacrifices in order to gain adequate preparation for the life-task, paves the way for high achievement.”

The evidence for a leader to place a high priority on a life of self-leadership is overwhelming. Daniel Golman, the author of the best-selling book Emotional Intelligence wrote that “exceptional leaders distinguish themselves because of superior self-leadership.”

In summary, Self-Leadership is important because:

1.  I cannot lead others before I have led myself. It is an issue of integrity and priority. Self-Leadership helps us become the person others want to follow.

2.  I can only take others as far as I have taken myself. It is an issue of modelling. Leaders are to be tour guides and not travel agents. Paul told the Corinthians to “Follow my example as I follow the example of Christ.”  1 Corinthians 11:1 In reflecting on his ministry to the Thessalonians he said, “You know how we lived among you for your sake. You became imitators of us and the Lord.”  1 Thessalonians 1:5-6

3.  It is only as I am faithful with the little things that God will entrust me with bigger things. It is an issue of stewardship. Jesus said to His disciples when telling the story of the faithful servant, “You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things.”  Matthew 25:21

4.  Leaders develop over a lifetime. It is an issue of faithfulness. Once leaders stops growing, they stop leading. Doctor Robert Clinton of Fuller Theological Seminary paraphrased Paul’s words to the Corinthians this way; “I am serious about finishing well in my Christian ministry. I discipline myself for fear that after challenging others in the Christian life, I myself might become a casualty.”  1 Corinthians 9:26-27 Gordon MacDonald, who wrote the book A Resilient Life, wrote at the age of 85 that, “The saddest thing is to awaken at old age and discover you have been using a small part of your potential.”

5.  Leaders will be required to give an account to the Lord of the life that was entrusted to them. It is an issue of accountability. Paul lived with the eternal in mind. “So, we make it our goal to please Him whether we are at home in the body or away from it. For we must all appear before the judgement seat of Christ, so that each of us may receive what is due us for the things done while in the body whether good or bad.”  2 Corinthians 5:10

How sad it is for me to see some of my acquaintances who are dead at 60 and are buried at 80; people who are playing safe and not taking risks, who are never doing things they have not done before, who are now content to stay in their comfort zones and who have stopped believing that the best is yet to come.

Now living in my senior years, I am more aware than ever before that “I am not my own, I have been bought with a price.” 1 Corinthians 6:19-20.  I am a steward of the gift of life that God has entrusted to me.

For these five reasons, a life of Self-Leadership is of great importance to me.

SELF-LEADERSHIP – A CASE STUDY – HUDSON TAYLOR

Following a season of deep prayer by his mother and sister, Hudson Taylor committed his life to serve Jesus Christ. He then began to ask God if He would give him the assurance of a clear direction for the rest of his life. He so wanted to live a life pleasing to God in every way that he felt he would go anywhere and do anything for the Lord if he would only give him the assurance of His clear direction.

A conviction began to emerge until finally he heard these words; “Your prayer is answered; your conditions are accepted.” From that time he had a deep understanding that he was called to serve in China.

From that day he began to prepare for a life that would call for great endurance. He immediately began to develop a rigorous list of disciplines that would equip him for a life of self-leadership. These included:

·   Taking more exercise in the open air.

·   Exchanging his feather bed for a hard mattress.

·   Carefully watching his diet.

·   Visiting the poorest parts of town distributing tracts and holding house meetings to share his faith.

·   Devoting more time to prayer and personal Bible study.

·   Giving 10% of his income to the work of God.

·   Disciplining himself for the purpose of enduring hardship and living on a decreasing source of income.

·   Learning to depend on God alone for protection, supplies and help of every kind.

·   Developing his own course to learn the Chinese language. By reading a Chinese version of the gospel of Luke and comparing verses with their equivalent in English, he was able to compile his own Chinese dictionary.

·   Getting up at five in the morning and going to bed early at night.

·   Working on three languages; Latin, Greek and Hebrew.

He rented a very modest room in order to accustom himself to enduring hardship and getting by on a small sum of money he earned working for a doctor. It was during this time that he gained a deeper, more painful understanding of the sacrifices that would be required to go to China.

But the biggest test came when he fell in love with a Christian girl who didn’t feel called to the mission field. It caused him to question why he should go to China. But there came a moment where he had a wonderful experience of the love of God. He broke off the relationship and concluded, “Now I am happy in my Saviour’s love. I can thank Him for all, even the most painful experiences, and trust Him without fear for all that is to come.” He had come to learn that no matter what sacrifice he made, the reward was greater.

Resourced from Hudson Taylor’s Spiritual Secret by Dr. and Mrs. Howard Taylor Edited and revised by Gregg Lewis.

SELF-LEADERSHIP – A CASE STUDY – DEMOSTHENES

Demosthenes (384 BC – 322 BC) was noted for his speaking ability which established him as one of the most powerful orators from ancient Greece. But it didn’t begin like that. He had a speech impediment, a stammer, which caused him to be lacking in confidence. To learn to speak with authority, he devised his own self-leadership training program by:

·   talking with a mouthful of pebbles.

·   reciting verses while running out of breath.

·   projecting his voice over the sound of the crashing waves along a rocky shore.

·   studying the speeches of great orators.

·   practicing in front of a mirror.

Demosthenes, an Athenian statesman was recognised as the greatest of ancient Greek orators who roused a nation by his powerful speeches. J. Oswald Sanders was right. “A leader is a person who has learned to obey a discipline imposed from without, and has then taken on a more vigorous discipline from within….. Many who drop out of ministry are sufficiently gifted, but have large areas of life floating free from the Holy Spirit’s control……DISCIPLINE IN EARLY LIFE, which is prepared to make sacrifices in order to gain adequate preparation for the life-task, paves the way for high achievements.”

AREAS OF SELF-LEADERSHIP

The following are some of the key areas of self-leadership that I have found to be important.

1. MY LIFE PURPOSE – what on earth am I here for?

This helps prevent the good things getting in the way of the best things. It was said of Donald McGavran, the father of the Church Growth Movement, that he played a one string guitar. Self-discipline is necessary to keep me focused on my life purpose just as Paul wrote, “But ONE thing I do, forgetting what is behind and straining toward the goal to win the prize which God has called me heavenwards in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 3:13-34 At a critical time in my life, the Holy Spirit confirmed my life’s calling: “He is the one we proclaim, admonishing and teaching everyone with all wisdom, so that we may present everyone fully mature in Christ. To this end I strenuously contend with all the energy Christ so powerfully works in me.” Colossians 1:28-29

2. MY ATTITUDES - which reveal the state of my heart.

If I lose my attitude, I lose my influence. I don’t always have the choice of how people will relate to me, but I do have the choice of how I will respond to the way people relate to me.

3. MY IDENTITY – which defines my significance and security.

I get to choose how I will define my significance and security. My identity as a person needs to be based on a strong unchanging foundation. I am significant because God created me, and I am secure because God loves me unconditionally. My identity is not found in what I do, rather it is found in who I am.

4. MY CONTINUOUS GROWTH – because I am a steward of the gift of my life, not the owner.

I choose to stay on the cutting edge of life and live my live to my full potential. Jesus modelled a life of balanced growth. “Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and man.”  Luke 2:52

5. SELF-AWARENESS – I need to see myself as God sees me.

David, a man after God’s own heart prayed, “Search me O God and see if there is any offensive way in me.”  Psalm 139:23-24 Self-aware people are aware of their impact on others, their weaknesses, their strengths, and their limits.

6. TIME AND MONEY – gifts from God.

My stewardship of time demands that I do what needs to be done when it needs to be done, whether I like it or not. My stewardship of money is revealing, “for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”  Matthew 6:21

7. MY BODY – the temple of the Holy Spirit.

Caring for my body includes disciplining myself in the areas of eating and drinking, exercising, sleeping, and managing my stress levels. Paul said, “Do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own, you were bought with a price. Therefore, honour God with your body.” 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

8. MY FRIENDSHIPS – I become like the people with whom I spend most of my time.

I value friends who believe in me and who will challenge, inspire and encourage me. “Do not be misled, bad company ruins good character.” 1 Corinthians 15:13 “As iron sharpens iron, a friend sharpens a friend.”  Proverbs 27:17

9. MY BIBLE STUDY AND PRAYER – to grow my relationship with God.

I have been inspired by the life of Jesus who “OFTEN withdrew to lonely places and prayed.” Luke 5:16 Paul’s encouragement to Timothy has inspired me to, “Do your BEST to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth.”  2 Timothy 2:15 For the past 20 years I have maintained a goal of reading through the Bible each year.

10. MY EYES – my window to the world in which I live.      

Self-leadership has much to do with a very small part of our bodies, our eyes.    Jesus said, “The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eyes are unhealthy, your whole body will be full of darkness.”          Matthew 6:22-23

11. MY WORDS – have the power of life and death.        

The Bible has much to say about the power of the tongue. “Death and life are in the power of the tongue and those who love it will eat its fruit.” Proverbs 18:21 “Let no corrupt talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”   Ephesians 4:29 “Those who consider themselves religious and do not keep a tight rein on their tongues deceive themselves and their religion is worthless.” James 1:26

12. MY THOUGHTS – that require me to guard my mind.        

David was so intent on keeping his thought life under control that he invited God to search his thoughts. “Search me, God, and know my heart, test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” Psalm 139:23-24         Paul gives us guidelines on how to develop our thought life. “Finally, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent and praiseworthy – think about such things.” Philippians 4:8-9

13. A HEART OF THANKSGIVING – that reflects an attitude of gratitude.         “Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”         1 Thessalonians 5:18         Every morning I begin my journalling by writing down 4 things from the previous 24 hours for which I can thank God.

14. MY TRUST IN GOD ALONE – who will never leave me or forsake me.         Hudson Taylor said, “To me it was a very grave matter to contemplate going to China, far from human aid, there to depend on the living God alone for protection, supplies and help of every kind. To learn before leaving England, to move man, through God by prayer alone.”         God’s work done in God’s way and God’s timing, will never lack God’s resources. Paul could confidently say, “And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of His glory in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:10 One of the most challenging tests I have had to face at critical times has been to quietly trust God for my every need.

STEPS TO A LIFE OF SELF-LEADERSHIP

1.  ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR LIFE OF SELF-LEADERSHIP DEVELOPMENT Understand that God has created you for a purpose and that He takes ordinary people who make themselves available to Him to do extraordinary things.

2.  START EARLY IN LIFE OR START TODAY “It is good for a person to bear the yoke while they are young.” Lamentations 3:27 Be faithful in the little things and realise that wherever you go you have an audience of one.

3.  START WITH THE END IN MIND Be like Hudson Taylor who asked God at an early age if He would give him the assurance of a clear direction for his life. Grow to understand, “What on earth am I here for?”

4.  FIND MENTORS THAT YOU CAN LEARN FROM. It was Thom Rainer who said that the one common factor of great church leaders is that they were being continuously and intentionally mentored by others. Much of my growth as a leader has resulted from seeking out key mentors by “starting at the top and working my way down. They might say ‘no’ but they could say ‘yes’”. MENTORING – A RELATIONSHIP THAT EMPOWERS – A Tribute to My Mentor John Mallison | Rod Denton (roddentoneng.com.au)

5.  DEVELOP YOUR SELF-LEADERSHIP PROGRAM Learn from the examples of Hudson Taylor and Demosthenes. Become a student of yourself and focus on developing your strengths as you grow to understand the way God has shaped you.

6.  REMEMBER YOU ARE WRITING YOUR EPITAPH EVERY DAY Time is a gift from God and must be used as it unfolds or be forever lost. Moses, in the oldest Psalm in the Bible wrote, “Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” Psalm 90:12

7.  GUARD YOUR ATTITUDE We cannot choose our circumstances in life, but we can choose our attitude to our circumstance. People with healthy attitudes have learned that failure is not final, that faith can overcome fear, that the glass is half full rather than half empty, that there is an opportunity in every setback, that hope can overcome despair, and to focus on the eternal and not the temporal.

8.  LIVE WITH GOD’S PERSPECTIVE ON YOUR LIFE Perspective is the ability to see life through God’s eyes and separates leaders from followers. Perspective is Joseph saying to his brothers, “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.” Genesis 50:20

9.  CHOOSE TO FINISH WELL Retirement is never an option. The Psalmist gives us helpful perspective when he says, “The righteous will flourish like a palm tree; They will grow like a cedar in Lebanon. Planted in the house of the Lord they shall flourish in the courts of God. THEY WILL STILL BEAR FRUIT IN THEIR OLD AGE; they will stay fresh and green.”  Psalm 92:12 Erwin McManus in his book The Last Arrow urges his readers “to save nothing for the next life. May you die with your quiver empty. May you die with your hearts full.”

ANNEXURE A :  A SELF-LEADERSHIP CHECK UP Questions I have asked myself at the beginning of a new year….

·   What on earth am I here for?

·   How can I take my calling to the next level?

·   What are the good things that could prevent me from doing the best things?

·   What steps do I need to take to keep living a life of continual growth?

·   Am I maintaining the self-leadership disciplines that will keep me on the cutting edge of life?

·   Am I living a life of ‘emotional intelligence’?

·   What things have I been doing that have now passed their used by date?

·    Am I willing to take faith (risk) steps to embrace the new and radical challenges (open doors) that the Lord has for me, or am I settling for a more comfortable life?

·    Am I living my life for the things that are eternal?

·    Am I still trusting the Lord for all my needs?

·    Am I being a good steward of the spiritual gifts the Lord has given me?

·    Am I finishing well?