SELFISHNESS (2)
SELFISHNESS (2)
James 3:14 (NASB)
14 “But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your heart, do not be arrogant and so lie against the truth.”
Selfishness comes easy for us because we all tend to be this way at one time or another. Learning to deal with ourselves and overcome our selfishness is going to determine the extent of how much God will use us. If we are selfish, we will be more concerned about doing our will instead of the will of God. The result is a hindrance in our ministry for Christ. Selfishness affects our marriage. A selfish spouse creates dissension with their spouse. A husband or wife that is concerned about the needs of their mate creates more intimacy and love in the relationship.
Charles Finney said, “Selfishness consists in dethroning reason from the seat of government and enthroning blind desire in opposition to it. Selfishness is always and by necessity unreasonable. It is a denial of that divine attribute that allies human beings to God and makes us capable of virtue. Selfishness dethrones reason and sinks human beings to the level of a brute. It is a contempt for the voice of God within him. Shame on selfishness! It dethrones human reason.”
When we get selfish, bitterness tends to take hold of our lives. We get the “Look at what they did to me” attitude. An unforgiving attitude also develops as we proclaim, “I’ve been wronged!” Selfishness makes us greedy, and greed makes us selfish. We reason, “I’ve got to have more no matter who gets in my way.” It is this kind of thinking that destroys us and others. It does not make us happy, but miserable. Selfishness can be conquered. It is through the help of the Holy Spirit that we can conquer our selfish desires and be concerned about the needs of others. As we look from Genesis to Revelation, we find a number of biblical principles that pertain to the topic of selfishness. We will look at the following areas that pertain to selfishness.
I. Some Commands that Involve Selfishness
1. Selfish men are to be avoided because they are difficult to trust.
2. Sexual sin is to be shunned.
Sexual sin is the result of strong selfish desires. Sexual sin is a result of the preeminence of self. Sexual sin does not care about the results of this sin on you, the other person, or others who are a part of our lives including parents, friends, family members, a wife or husband, and our children.
When people put themselves first, the lives of others suffer. The motto of the world today is: “If it feels good, do it!” The result of this philosophy is sexual immorality, drunkenness, drug abuse, violence, disease, and death. Our schools are teaching our children that sex is OK if it’s safe. They are teaching our kids to be selfish and fulfill their lust. This teaching contradicts so called “self-esteem” philosophy because immorality lowers a person’s self-esteem and brings shame and reproach. It harms people socially, psychologically, spiritually, and physically (sexually transmitted diseases). If you violate God’s Word, you will reap the consequences of your actions. Your sin will find you out! Paul warned us to not indulge in the selfishness of fulfilling lustful desires.
1 Thessalonians 4:3 (NASB)
3 “For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality.”
1 Peter 2:11 (NASB)
11 “Beloved, I urge you as aliens and strangers to abstain from fleshly lusts which wage war against the soul.”
Proverbs 6:25 (NASB)
25 “Do not desire her beauty in your heart, nor let her capture you with her eyelids.”
Solomon is referring to a prostitute here. We are not to covet her beauty and be captivated by her glances and charm which can be very powerful to a single man or a man who is not intimate with his wife and happily married to her.
3. Self-Glory is not to be sought.
Selfish people tend to struggle with self-praise. They want to be acknowledged or praised, even when they may not deserve such praise. God warns us not to promote ourselves lest we be humiliated and demoted. As a pastor, you are not to promote or exalt yourself. You are to point your church to Jesus Christ and create a dependence upon Him, not you. A church that is built around the personality of the Pastor tends to be unstable. Once the Pastor leaves to go to another ministry or dies, the church tends to fall apart.
Proverbs 25:6-7 (NASB)
6 “Do not claim honor in the presence of the king, and do not stand in the place of great men;
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7 For it is better that it be said to you, “Come up here,” Than for you to be placed lower in the presence of the prince, whom your eyes have seen.”
4. Keep your Sights open for selfish greed.
Luke 12:14-15 (NASB)
14 “But He said to him, “Man, who appointed Me a judge or arbitrator over you?”
15 Then He said to them, “Beware, and be on your guard against every form of greed; for not even when one has an abundance does his life consist of his possessions.”
5. Be Sensitive toward the needs of others.
1 Corinthians 10:24 (NASB)
24 “Let no one seek his own good, but that of his neighbor.”
Philippians 2:3-4 (NASB)
3 “Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves;
4 do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.”
Let me share the point with you about a lesson that I was taught when my pastor shared this story with us back in 1984: “Many years ago, a 10-year-old boy walked up to the counter of a soda shop and climbed onto a stool. He caught the eye of the waitress and asked, “How much is an ice cream sundae?” “Fifty cents,” the waitress replied. The boy reached into his pockets, pulled out a handful of change, and began counting.
The waitress frowned impatiently. After all, she had other customers to wait on. The boy squinted up at the waitress. “How much is a dish of plain ice cream?” he asked. The waitress sighed and rolled her eyes. “Thirty-five cents,” she said with a note of irritation. Again, the boy counted his coins. At last, he said, “I’ll have the plain ice cream, please.” He put a quarter and two nickels on the counter. The waitress took the coins, brought the ice cream, and walked away.
About 10 minutes later, she returned and found the ice cream dish empty. The boy was gone. She picked up the empty dish—then she swallowed hard. There on the counter, next to the wet spot where the dish had been, were two nickels and five pennies. The boy had enough for a sundae, but he had ordered plain ice cream so he could leave a tip.”
What was the lesson that was both taught and learned? This boy was unselfishly sensitive to the need of another.
6. Don’t Shun your opportunities to praise or encourage people.
Proverbs 3:27-28 (NASB)
27 “Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it.
28 Do not say to your neighbor, “Go, and come back, and tomorrow I will give it,” When you have it with you.”