Share from your scar & not your wound

A scar is a mark on the skin which is left after a wound has healed. Let me make this clear by stating that is not the kind of scarring I am referring to.

I am talking about the deep scars caused by emotional pains, setbacks in life, hitting rock bottom, mental suffering, a bad divorce settlement, having an illness, being a victim of domestic violence, rape, abuse, to losing a loved one. 

Like everyone else, I have had traumas that have affected me in the past, penetrating more fear into me than a junkie needs its next fix of heroin.

But I have also realised these kinds of scars are a mark of wisdom of a true warrior who has gone through shit loads of stuff in life yet, can get up stronger and share the experience to help guide others in doing so.

Therefore, writing books on encouraging others of the marvellous feeling you get from self-working on oneself has. Mindset Coaching to get people on the right path mentally, and Personal Training to share my knowledge and keep people on the healthy, fit path for the long run.

When you share from your scar and not your wound, you give others a helping hand to a feeling of a light at the end of the tunnel. 

Let me give you an example; someone who has been a victim of domestic abuse or rape, chooses to no longer accept they are a victim. 

From the moment they made their decision to speak up and raise their voice to others who have had the same experiences, is the moment they shared their comeback, gained clarity of their awful experience and turned it around in a powerful format giving hope to others. 

All those self-loafing thoughts brought on by this terrible experience are lifted.

In return, strength has return within them and they can continue to live life again.

An unpleasant experience is just that, and scars can heal over time.

However, if wounds are untreated over time, they can lengthen or even stop the healing process.

Unfortunately, life faces us with some unpleasant situations which can blind us in seeing it can actually be turned around if worked on constantly.

Remember, everyone has a different story to tell. 

Either way, that story will resonate with someone who has had the same experience.

It is no surprise that many people that have been wounded have also taken their time out by not sharing when the wound has been fresh.

They too have undergone a healing process, maybe a few months to a few years down the line. 

Either way, they have understood that the process needs time to heal and that the scar isn’t just a reminder of that pain, but a reminder of how they have overcome the situation and have moved forward stronger than ever before. 

These are the people who move to achieving greatness in life and know that time is precious, more so to waste it on feeding a wound that will do nothing for them but continue the misery of their traumatic experience.

Everyone deals with situations differently; some are stronger than others when faced with adversity. But one thing these people all share that is the same, If healing is allowed to take place and emotion are nurtured and balance correctly, they all can heal that wound and move forward if resistance isn’t placed.

Losing a loved one can be really hard and they say time heals. 

Yes, it does, but there will be days when it can be tough and there will be days when not. 

Back in 2020, I lost my father who was suffering with Cancer for a while.

I was so grateful I had time with him and I could properly say goodbye. I accepted he would no longer be in my life, and that truly hurt me. 

It has taken a chunk out of my heart, but at the same time, I have so many exceptional memories that place a smile on my face, more so than sadness of him no longer being in my life. 

Losing a loved one truly sucks, but also be mindful that if you experience this kind of loss, just think, would your loved one want you to suffer, or would they want you to live your life to the full?

I can answer that directly by saying this: they would want you to continue living your life in your best form and to be happy doing so. 

Life is short and the older you get it moves faster than ever before. 

The key is to never resist, but mindfully set yourself up and understand there will be ups and downs in life that are there for a self growth. 

When life is up, grab it with both hands and cherish the moment.

When it is down, do not allow it to become a wound. 

Instead, look to that past scar and be in-tune with the pain it caused you, how you feed it to grow and the time you spent healing. 

This will motivate you and get your focus back on the healing journey you undertook and remind you of your growth!

Here are some tips to keep you on track:

# Take yourself back to that moment that caused you that wound. Remind yourself of that wasted time you invested in feeding that pain.

# Remind yourself of how it affected you by not enjoying that present moment.

# Remind yourself of any missed opportunities you didn’t see  because you were more focused on feeding your pain.

#Now take a step back and remind yourself of that first feeling you had when you began to heal.

Just by going back and re-living an awful experience will make you mindful that it just isn’t worth feeding the wound. 

Focus on feeding your true needs, life is too short for bullshit especially feeding a wound that you will get fuck all back from, except pain misery and missed opportunities in life.

Let that wound be your guide instead of giving into its pain, only then you allow the process of healing to enter your life so as you, can live it to the fullest capacity.

#mindsetcoach #mentalhealth #healing

If you are interested in working with Helena, drop her a line at: info@helenaphil.com

www.helenaphil.com