Not Smart to Ignore Emotional Intelligence in the Workplace

Learning to master one’s emotions is life-changing, says industrial and organizational psychologist, Kirstin Liss, who has released an online program aimed at developing emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence, also often referred to as EQ or emotional quotient, is having the ability to manage and use your emotions in a healthy manner. The term was first coined in 1990 by psychology professors John D Mayer of UNH and Peter Salovey of Yale, in a research paper. In 1995 American psychologist David Goleman proposed that EQ is just as important as IQ for success in all spheres of life, including academic, professional, social, and interpersonal. He created a framework of five key components that make up emotional intelligence, namely: self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy, and social skills, and suggested that EQ is a skill that can be learnt and developed.

And who wouldn’t want to develop a skill that can help us succeed in all aspects of life?

While it stands to reason that humans require emotional intelligence or EQ to manage relationships with others and ourselves throughout our personal lives, there is nowhere where EQ becomes more important than in the workplace.

With an average 40 hour working week, whether from home or on-site, and whichever statistics one chooses to look at, there is no doubt we spend a fairly big chunk of our lives at work, communicating and dealing with other people - our colleagues, employees, managers, and even customers.

Without EQ, these interactions can make or break us. Industrial and organizational psychologist, Kirstin Liss, says a lack of emotional intelligence in leaders as well as in employees can, and often does, negatively affect businesses.

“It’s not only important for leaders but for everyone. Leaders influence, and in one way, are a little like our parents, but in the workplace. Their emotional response, which leads to a behavior, provides a foundation for others to learn from and behave in the workplace. If leaders don’t exercise emotional intelligence, employees may experience high levels of anxiety and stress, become fearful, or disrespectful, dislike working for the organization, become demotivated, disengaged, and unproductive, and in some situations, resign,” said Liss, who has worked as a registered counselor in the workplace for 11 years and has two decades of experience in the talent management field.

She says leaders and employees are often caught up in deadlines, productivity, and performance, and as such EQ is not always prioritized or even considered.

“It takes a conscious and deliberate effort to manage one’s emotions. We do this by thinking about our thinking, and in turn that will affect how we respond, react, and behave. We can have all the systems and processes in place, but if we don’t have emotional intelligence, these often go wasted. Our anxious emotions are so caught up in prioritizing continuous deadlines and crises that we put little effort into engaging with our subordinates to have meaningful and engaging conversations - all part of our EQ, which can have a profound effect on others.”

Liss said while EQ played an important role in our professional lives, it was important to note that EQ was not only vital in the workplace. “It’s not just in the workplace, EQ is important for life in general. I’m so passionate about this because it really can transform a person’s life and have a knock-on effect on all spheres of life. If we stop to truly analyze ourselves and the situation, we will start to feel and think differently. It’s a very empowering experience. When you master that, many things change in your life... I speak from personal experience and from all the coaching and training I have done.”

As the world has learnt to become more aware of mental health and wellbeing over the years, particularly over the past few years dealing with a pandemic, Liss says EQ has gained more attention, though it is still not always taken seriously. “Covid-19 has definitely shown us how important well-being and mental health are. It has opened us up to be more vulnerable and to think about how we work and what we take seriously in life. Both individuals and companies are investing in a better wellbeing framework, but people often don’t realize the impact EQ has on wellbeing.”

Many organizations don’t understand the return on investment in emotional intelligence.

She said the bottom line for most companies was revenue and trying to show the return on investment when it came to EQ was not always easy. “One thing for sure is that people work hard and are generally emotional people. We also have a significant population that works hard for little pay, and it’s difficult not to feel disgruntled by it. It’s also easy to feel resentful when we experience inequality in the workplace. Many of us are doing jobs, not because we enjoy it, but because we must. We are governed by the bottom line in organizations, continuously working in stressful environments. Many organizations don’t understand the return on investment in emotional intelligence and will cut their training budgets to only afford compliance, procedure, and product knowledge. The need for EQ is starting to change, but more so at the upper level of management within organizations. The trend is more at the individual level, rather than the group. However, all employees should embark on an emotional intelligence journey, for a real transformational experience for the organization. Unfortunately, though companies display interest, little effort goes into the actual implementation of developing EQ in employees,” said Liss.

Liss describes EQ as a way to challenge your thinking and says we are all capable of developing emotional intelligence. “Unless you are diagnosed with a severe chronic mental condition, which is beyond your control, everyone has the capability of developing emotional intelligence, we just haven’t applied the muscles to do so. Our problem is that we are creatures of habit, and our personality becomes a force to be reckoned with. Our automatic responses are our habits which are often learnt and become powerful in shaping how we respond to the world. Our learning process accumulates over time, in which the brain converts a sequence of actions into an automatic routine, known as ‘chunking’. We have hundreds of these behavioral chunks that we rely on every day, like driving —and we do this without really thinking. The same applies when someone may call us out for doing something wrong. We may react with brashness immediately, as we put up our defensive mechanism. It is hard to control. The outcome of not learning how to become skillful in using your emotions effectively, generally leads to negative outcomes.”

In an attempt to help develop the EQ of employees and leaders, Liss has recently created an online emotional intelligence course. She also advocates for EQ assessments during a company’s hiring process and EQ skills development training in instances where teams may be underperforming, where there are conflicts, high rates of absenteeism, or when companies are going through big changes.

She designed her course, which is available through the ENCONA website, after realizing that many people do not always feel in control or accountable for their behavior. “It occurred to me that it didn’t matter what salary you were on, level you were at, the job you were doing, or company you were working at, people often indirectly complained that they are worth more and can’t cope with the continuous challenges experienced. Moving on, or out, was always the emotional response to make things better. Emotions and thoughts interact with one another like the mind and body to music. It’s an emotional dance. What if you could choose the music you want to listen to? For instance, if you are experiencing a bad day at work, all is going wrong... you can either choose to respond by crying and falling apart, feeling completely powerless, or you choose to respond by working through the issues systematically, and partnering with others in an effective manner by realizing what you are in control of. Yes, you can get upset or angry, frustrated, or sad, but what thoughts do you apply to manage those emotions? Emotions are part of how humans function and are thus intrinsic to every organizational setting and have an impact on performance and functioning. It also serves as a moderator between work-family conflict and career commitment.”

Using scientific education, research, and experience, Liss has designed a six-module, self-paced online course that allows individuals to learn through reflection and practical application. “I wanted to share with the world how they can master their own emotions for their success. Through the course you will be exploring your EQ through the rabbit hole, participating in case studies, and performing self-based assessments through interactive videos and readings. Developing self-awareness and identifying areas that impact your work, relationships, and the self, will help to enrich your life with many constructive outcomes, including your wellbeing” Liss explained.

Liss said though EQ could be learnt and developed, it required willingness and a continuous effort. “What I enjoy most is seeing the change. For some, it takes time, but when it does happen, it is probably the most rewarding and fulfilling experience I have. We all deserve to feel happier in life. When I see organizations evolving to really take care of their employees, which is an act of humility, it gives me great pleasure. Emotional intelligence changed my life and still forms part of my journey and experiences. Sometimes I do need to put in a little more effort to apply myself effectively, after all, I’m only human, but I’m emotionally smart!”

This article has been adapted from the original by Madeleine Chaput, featured in dispatchlive.co.za.