Suicide is insidious, but here is what we can do about it (and an algorithm to help us act)

Suicide is one of the biggest challenges that we, as a society, face. According to the WHO, there are in the region of 2.5 - 3,000 (2 people EVERY minute) suicides each and every day. The human cost is astounding. The cost to the economy is in the Billions of Euros. At some stage in our lives, most of us will experience mental health issues, but for many, suicide will present.

Sometimes you can tell when someone is suicidal, and sometimes you cant and that is scary. So what can we do? How can we spot the signs and make a difference?

Although it is difficult, there are certain things we can look out for, signs that we can act upon. I thought I would share the following, from experience:

"When someone finds the courage to talk about wanting to take their own life, they’re asking for help." Pieta House

Listen out for:

1. Talking about suicide
2. Talking about hurting themselves, or self-harm
3. Discussion on being depressed or hopeless in life, being trapped, not having choices, a purpose or options in life

Watch out for:

• Writing or blogging about suicide
• Planning suicide
• Giving away personal items
• Saying goodbye, in particular out of context
• Escapism behaviours such as binges on drink or drugs
• Signs of self harm
• Depression, PTSD, Borderline Personality traits that include withdrawing from family, friends, or work
• Lack of sleep, fitness activities and socialising

But what then? Well, if you feel someone is suicidal, it is essential to say it out loud. 

Ask the question: Are you thinking about suicide?

or perhaps: "You seem really down and I am worried about you. Are you thinking about ending your own life?"

Don't judge, and if you are suspicious, it is for a reason so listen carefully and ask more questions such as:

• How are things going for you, how are you dealing with what is happening in your life?
• Are you thinking about hurting yourself?
• Have you ever thought about suicide before, or tried to harm yourself before?
• Have you thought about how or when you'd do it?
• Do you have a plan?

"You seem really down and I am worried about you. Are you thinking about ending your own life?"

If the answer is "YES", don't panic, don't judge. We need to be very realistic here, guilt'ing someone into not ending their life by discussing their children just doesn't work. This is the time to involve family, friends, or colleagues. This is the time to get professional help (ask for forgiveness afterwards if you have to, just act).

If there is an imminent threat of suicide, you need emergency help:

1. Calmly persuade the person to let you help them: “Will you go with me to get help?” or “Will you let me assist you to get help?”
2. Call your GP (Get a visit, get a referral, get advice)
3. Call the accident and emergency room (they always have a psychiatrist on call)
4. Call family, now.

If the threat is not imminent, it is still serious, we still need expert help: Refer the person to Pieta House immediately. Be sure to follow up, stay in touch, offer to bring them to their appointments - Call Freephone: 1800 247 247 or text HELP to 51444

*Note with any meaningful service, such as Pieta House, there can be a delay in accessing the service due to volume (that is how serious this issues is), so during this time, stay connected, check in regularly and support.

Here is a simple algorithm that can help us work through this:

I hope this helps us all help others. If you feel it might, please share this and spread the word.