"Tales of a Scorched Coffee Pot" - Chapter 130

At Todd's insistence, Monday will mark the day of Edgar and Ken's big road trip odyssey. Well, in fact, Todd did not specify a day, only that he wanted Edgar to pick one, for taking this flown in specialist around to check out the other three stores. Both agree that Monday seems to make the most sense, in light of the timeline for everything else.

           As Ken's hotel room is relatively close to the Palmyra location, he is able to Uber his way over there come Monday. Edgar arrives early enough to dispatch those weekly sales reports in all three places the bosses still demand – though he is thankfully able to avoid Vince's miserable fly-by audible one this time around – and then he and Ken  huddle around Russell's desk, alongside its owner, back in his office, to participate in the traditional endless meeting, where people take turns reciting their portions of these same numbers that Edgar just sent everyone. At least Ken gets to spice things up by introducing himself to everyone, and explain that they will visiting the other stores this morning.

           It's only when they hop into Edgar's truck for the journey down to Chesboro that he begins to hear some detail concerning Ken's background. Though his guest first evinces some surprise that Edgar skips the interstate in favor of parallel side roads.

           “Nah, I mostly go this way,” he explains, “it typically saves about ten or fifteen minutes, believe it or not. And that's without there being a wreck on the interstate – in that case, it's an even bigger difference.”

           And so Ken launches into his life story, or at least the parts relevant to this mission, with a smidgen of personal color. The small chain where he and Todd and the others were working went under, right before this mob's staggered arrival here. Ken was left scrambling for any kind of industry job whatsoever, therefore is stuck working in a produce department for not much more than minimum wage – and indeed, his business card currently has a cartoonish logo of various fruits in a bunch, just above his employer's name (Foods For Less) in the top left corner. Centered upon this white background then are the expected fields of his own name, in red ink, everything else pertinent listed below in black: cell phone, email, and his primary discipline, DATA SPECIALIST.

           It's an odd congruence of elements, though Ken has reason to be optimistic, and list what he actually excels in rather than what he's stuck doing now. He's stoked about this consultant gig Todd has roped him into, however, as he can continue working there while remotely helping the WSM crew out here. All of which is kind of crucial because he has this mail order bride in Central America whom he's trying to relocate to the States.

           “That's cool,” Edgar tells him, nodding as he shoots a glance over to his passenger.

           And it is – Ken's an affable, knowledgeable guy, kind of like some wisecracking action movie sidekick from the 1980s. Wearing partially unbuttoned collared shirts with his voluminous wiry chest hair uncorked, in the manner of a dad at some cookout in a Hawaiian shirt, who is in fact sometimes wearing an actual Hawaiian shirt. So it would be great if that all worked out for him. From his own side of the fence, Edgar's happy to have the guy around, because while it seems like their experience levels are roughly even, Ken does know some of the guys in RU Data, which was the whole reason he was brought aboard. Having two people work on projects is far better than just one. Plus, in situations where Todd's default setting is always just to conclude that he's way more advanced than everyone else and that none of them here could possibly know what they're doing, the added firepower of having Ken backup what Edgar's saying or doing is huge, and appreciated.

           It's also nice to have someone who understands these various pricing and data topics, and bounce ideas off of based upon that information. Outside of Teri, who hasn’t been around the entire time, there's often nobody in the company who even knows what he's talking about. And even she is only a part time consultant now, does not officially work for Stable 2 Table From Wholesome Shopper Market. Not to mention that, owing to her extended absence, she is somewhat out of the loop on specific programs introduced since last working here, though a quick learner and obviously capable of being brought up to speed quickly.

           There's some hope of having Sharon take on some things, although this also – not to toot his own trumpet or whatever – highlights the mountain of interrelated concepts he's been on top of around here for eons, about which she'd almost have to know all, in order to tackle just one of them. This due in great part to the ridiculous, duct taped patchwork of programs and processes they currently have going around this place. Which is only getting incrementally worse, like for example with Todd's latest announcement, that he wants to run two separate weekly sales flyers. One for the Stable 2 Table stores, a different one for the pair of Chesboro locations.

           Another consideration is that Sharon has a job which is theoretically supposed to chain her to the back dock at Palmyra anyway. You wouldn't necessarily know this based upon the frequency that Todd has her deployed elsewhere – although in fairness, it's true that Sharon is often nakedly grabbing for as much power as she can, and making no bones about it. Still, while it seems impossible that Todd could not know what a receiver does, at the very least, he continues to treat it as inconsequential. Like when questioned how Palmyra is going to handle deliveries if he's pulling Sharon to help out in Lorena every day.

           “Well I guess Russell or Shelly or someone is gonna have to do it, then,” he says with a dismissive wave. While it's true that these figures cover for Sharon anyway, if she's on vacation or is otherwise required elsewhere, these are isolated, short bursts, not for what, from the sounds of things, might wind up being a month-long project up in Lorena. And anyway the sentiment behind the words themselves seems more telling, that he plainly considers this a very unimportant point.

           This is true even in instances where the proposed project that Edgar delegates in part to her can be done remotely, and in no way would require her traveling to Lorena at all. Even in this instance, Todd purses his lips and says, “mmm...just tell her to come up here anyway. I might need her for something else.”

           Thus this cycle of nuttiness perpetuates. They have people deployed elsewhere, and then still others moved to cover those have been moved. The specific project that Edgar's thinking he could use some help with, which Sharon would be very good at, is phase two of adding all these unique concoctions the Lorena deli is making. He's gotten most of them straightened out as far as making sure they ring up correctly, and that the PLU number has been changed, if needed, in the two scales they are keeping. That was the more crucial aspect. The next step, because this will be needed sooner or later, particularly if Vicky plans on adding some of those Lorena creations at the other stores, is entering them into their existing scale database. The ingredients in particular, which are extremely time consuming to type out by hand, but which require only some dedicated hours and an attention to detail.

           His initial proposal was to just coach Sharon over the phone, which would allow her to remain at her home store. But no, Todd insisted she make the trek up to Lorena today. So instead, when they were still at Palmyra this morning and during a spare moment when Shelly's not checking in anything, Edgar is logging onto the receiving computer to show Ken how this system works, then connecting remotely – which could have been done from anywhere, though this was as good a time as any – to show him how the deli scale program works, too. It just seems especially comical considering that Sharon could have and probably should have been sitting here at this moment as well, yet is up in Lorena.

           Granted, it's difficult to determine how much stems from her straining at her leash, and demanding to be involved, too. There is certainly some of that going on. Also, while she's plainly done a great job at everything that's been thrown her way, he's begun to suspect there's a little bit of this playing both sides phenomenon at work, a la Pierre O'Brien, where she's bitching to him incessantly about management...but then probably, if the truth were ever aired, bitching to management quite a bit about him.

           The first inkling he has that something is fishy on this front is a weird afternoon where she's down at the Central HQ for unspecified reasons, has been talking to Todd in his office for an eternity. It just so happens that the regular old communal printer everyone uses has been out of commission all day – well, it still prints, but the scanning and sending a document feature isn’t working, because it won’t connect to the internet. He has already had at least three people ask him why this isn't working, though he explains for the umpteenth time that the extent of his knowledge about fixing the internet is to hit the reset button on the modem. Which they've already tried, yes, multiple times.

           But then he's got Sharon standing in his doorway at one point, and speaking very loudly as though to pointedly project this across the office, i.e. to ensure that Todd can hear it. “Do you know why this printer isn't working? Someone was telling me that you were tinkering with it yesterday!”

           “Umm...,” Edgar says, bewildered for a number of different reasons, “I changed the black ink cartridge yesterday, yeah. But that wouldn't have anything to do with...connecting to...the internet...”

           “Ahhh...hmm!” she says, stumped and clamping her lips together. Puffing her cheeks out as she furrows her brows, as though considering this a very suspicious answer, indeed. Though one she is determined to get to the bottom of, mister, you better believe it! Well, good luck on that front, lady. Hope it works out for you.

           At least he has a day free of thinking about these company-wide contortions, though, while driving Ken around. Upon arriving in Chesboro, the drive around the outerbelt to the eastside takes longer than their actual Arcadia pit stop, where there's not a whole to show Ken. Walk the store once, showcase the always immaculate bulk department here, as run by Edgar's favorite employee at this location, Marita, the best at what she does despite a huge language barrier. Also, since they are passing through that back hallway anyhow, stop to give Ken an amusing little demonstration of how the lone scale works here, which has never been online and requires on-site manual update procedures different from anywhere else. Introduce him to what few employees haunt this glorious land, though Ken already knows Diane Evans, Candace isn't here, and most of the remaining characters (Walter, Ralph, Marian) are not exactly anyone with which you'd ever want to get bogged down into an extended conversation. It's best to nod and wave at and fly right on past these types, which is exactly what they do.

           This day is scheduled to conclude by heading into the heart of downtown, to knock off the HQ and Central tour both, before completing the loop back up to Palmyra. At his own desk for the first time since Thursday, Edgar spends a couple of hours showing Ken the major points of his work flow, from how he obtains the price lists from their major vendors, cleans those up, imports information to the various programs, and generates shelf tags and sales both through this snazzy new HSX printer, if here, or the old school methods still in place at their three current stores, or the completely different old school method currently used as a stopgap up in Lorena.

           It's only as they check off their final stop that he learns why Candace wasn't at Arcadia today – it's because she's pitching in at Central, in lieu of Destiny, for whatever reason. And this is yet another sharp reminder that there's virtually no escaping the craziness on any given day, certainly not during these turbulent times. It also represents the cherry on top, so to speak, crowning today's recurring theme. How everyone is continually all over the place, even when it seems like just leaving them where they are might make the most sense. According to Candace, Destiny was here earlier, but the bosses have some kooky scheme about wanting her to maybe act as the assistant manager at both Chesboro stores now, since Jesse recently quit and they haven't managed to rustle up anybody else.

           “Can you set me up with a log-in here?” she asks Edgar, as he and Ken are making their rounds. “I've been using Destiny's all day.”

           Though Hupp has proven itself as a robust and mostly reliable system, the lack of centralization for things like this is one of its few shortcomings. For any other POS program they've used, the same log-in would work anywhere. With Hupp, though, this feature is store specific. While it's possible they are just extraordinarily security minded, and would leave this in place even with a centralized hub, it feels more like a rare anachronistic throwback, the kind of thing you might see, well, yes, on a bunch of deli scales that are not online and therefore not networked.

           “Okay, sure, no problem,” he tells her, adding, “just give me a few minutes to walk back to the office. I'll make your password...”

           “Can't you just use my current password?” she interrupts.

           “I don't know your current password. I don't have access to anyone's passwords.”

           “You don't?”

           “No. Huh uh. It's a security thing. I can set the starting password, when I create the log-in, but you have to change it the first time you use it. Or I can reset it if someone’s locked out. But I can't see what the password actually is.”

           “Oh. Actually, now that I think about it, can you set up log-ins for every manager, at every store?”

           “What?”

           “Yes. Can you just do that? ‘Cause see, they plan on moving us all over. Actually, like, Pablo and Laurie too. Can you give them manager log-ins everywhere? I think they might be helping out some at Arcadia.”

           “But wait - Pablo and Laurie don't even have manager log-ins here. They're not in the system at that level,” Edgar replies.

           “I don't know, that's just what I was told. Can’t you just do it?”

           For over a month now, all of his interactions with Candace have suddenly featured this antagonistic edge. He's not sure what the deal is, apart from her obvious disgust at being forced to learn new programs. However, it's surely not lost on her that she is now a member of the “in” crowd, chummy with the likes of Diane Evans, though still attractive enough even in her late 40s that Todd would surely be drooling over her anyway, and have his ear as a result.

           At first, as he and Ken stroll back one last time to HQ, Edgar's contemplating emailing – or wait, scratch that, he means emailing and Slacking – all three of the head honchos, to ask whether they're okay with this. But then considers, you know what, Candace was already being halfway shitty with him over there for no reason whatsoever, so screw it. If he took this step of waiting to receive confirmation from the bosses, which would probably take anywhere from tomorrow to never, this would be more “proof” of how “difficult” he is being about everything. So yes. He adds Candace at Central, with the standard starting password of Wholesome123, and Pablo and Laurie and all of the existing managers at every store with the same, group emails everyone to explain this is happening. Then group Slacks them as well. Except it occurs to him that Candace had cut him off before he was able to tell her the password, and that she likely won't check her email or Slack for the remainder of the night, and therefore this would somehow be his fault. So he picks up the phone to call her over at Central, and spell this out for her.