Ten days - Insightful | Experiential | Hard Work | Discipline

“If the whole universe can be found in our own body and mind, this is where we need to make our inquires. We all have the answers within ourselves, we just have not got in touch with them yet. The potential of finding the truth within requires faith in ourselves.”

― Ayya Khema

The quest continues even today in the search for the meaning of life but this thought was seeded back in early 2000. I came to a big city after completing my education in search of a job. The small-town boy was lost somewhere competing in the corporate world, moving up the corporate ladder and down at a personal level. In those 5 years, I gained 35 kilos of weight, receding hairline, unfettered by the deterioration at a personal level I continued to play by the unwritten rules, be the best work machine that no one else can beat.

In 2009, I started to take notice of my health running was my new-found passion, I could devote a fair amount of time for my health and in the process inspired a lot to experience this "Joy of Running". I kept "running performance" as a yardstick to measure my health. Yet there was something missing, so I joined the Cycling group, completed Brevet rides of 200 km multiple times, and attempted and completed the 300 km Brevet ride as well. While all seemed good for a while but still I yearned for that peace, fulfillment in my life. No ways I was hitting the mid-life crises :-)

The quest to seek more landed me in the 10 days Vipassana Course. I am here to share my personal experiences which touched me deeply and my attempt to connect it with three aspects of my life which are very dear to me;

1. Human Capital Practitioner
2. Endurance Sport - Running and biking (for Amateurs like me to maintain a healthy lifestyle)
3. Idiosyncratic - How an individual reacts, perceives and experiences a situation

Pre-course :

I applied for the course online in October 2016 and got my confirmation 2 weeks before the course which was planned in December.

Day 0

I reached the center at 1 PM for the registration, filled the form, and just before the admission to the course I was informed to meet the Acharya(Teacher). I waited for my turn and soon I was in front of this individual sitting in a very stable posture with a smile on his face.

Question 1: Why are you here? 

Answer: Acharya, I am a runner and have come to explore mind and body connection. 

Question 2: Where did you hear about the course,?

Answer: Internet, by the look at his face, I could sense he was quite surprised that I took such a big risk of joining a course; little did I know what that expression on his face meant. 

After the admission, we were allotted our rooms, I was lucky to get a single room, though some were happy to share the room and not live in solitude. After which we were supposed to deposit all our valuables including cell phone which was very nicely secured and we were provided a card to reclaim the items after finishing the course. Thereafter, I met fellow students and it was interesting to see the diversity in the group, all age groups, ethnicity, religion, and nationality. Met few veterans and one of them described the course best; "Brain Surgery will be performed without Anesthesia and you will be the surgeon"

At 7 PM, the program formally started soon after the discourse, we took the following 5 vows:

1. To abstain from killing any being
2. To abstain from stealing
3. To abstain from sexual misconduct
4. To abstain from wrong speech 
5. To abstain from all intoxicants.

During these ten days, participants remain within the area of the course site, having no contact with the outside world. They refrain from reading and writing and suspend any religious or other activities. During these ten days, no eye contact with fellow participants, strict discipline to adhere to the course schedule outlined in the end.

During the first three and a half days we practiced exercise of mental concentration called Anapana. Keep attention in the area below nostrils and above the upper lip. Just be aware and attentive of the breath as it leaves and enters the nostrils. 5th day onward we were taught Vipassana to start feeling sensations from head to toes, moving your awareness in the same direction, and feeling each body part. It is believed that if you have solid gross sensations in any part of your body are associated with pain and vibrations happiness. Through experiential learning, it is observed both are fallacious being aware of these sensations and not reacting to either helps in the equanimity of the mind.

It is believed the biggest Dhamma (Dharma in Sanskrit) is Truth and the universal law which binds us together is Law of Nature. In-balance of any of these in our lives causes miseries and suffering is inevitable.

During the course, it's bound to happen that you may break down on the 4th, 6th, or the 8th day. On the 9th day, you are ready for the outside world again so you are taught another type of meditation Mangal Maitri to heal your wounds and others as well. The tenth day you are allowed to talk to each other and 11th day morning the course ends.

Few things which stayed with me:

• Nothing is permanent: Neither our happiness nor sorrows yet we keep both these with us for whole our lifetime. We are either living in the past or in the future. Our monkey minds Yapps and creates thinking patterns... This chakra is the biggest reason for misery in this world, it is believed the best way to live is to Live in the present. Relating to work, most of the miseries are self-created, self assumptions, and not verifying facts which creates so much anxiety at different levels in the organization. In other walks of life as well, there is so much focus on outcomes we stop enjoying the journey.
• "Materialism" Man's greed has no bounds, at a personal level, we associate our happiness with worldly things more houses, bigger cars, big bank balance. It is important to look around you, what makes people happy, and if money is not the answer then what is it? Self-realization is so important in all aspects of life else we lose ourselves in the process. Maintaining balance is key in all walks of life, Spiritual, Financial, Social, and Emotional.
• "Karma - Keeping your karma clean" It's very important to understand this my biggest revelation during this course, Karma first originates in your mind through thoughts, then on your tongue through words and then on your body through actions. You can keep your Karma clean by keeping your thoughts clean, then words, and finally through your actions. We can improve our karma by helping old people either by providing care, money to have a respectable life, young children by imparting good education, and adults by putting them on the right path. Think if you help someone in his youth with money, you have put him in misery cycle as it may happen he won't work whole his life and depend on borrowing money from you or others. Similarly, at work, doing your duties with utmost sincerity for the salary you draw is called integrity. At all times, keeping your organizations interest in mind and not shortchanging for your personal gains will give you peace and happiness in the long run.
• Dharma as Nature's Law: Most of the time, our miseries are not ours but given to us by others. When we are angry or unhappy with something, its a result of an event that happened outside and our reaction to that event or the situation which causes anger, jealousy, or arrogance. Let us understand this better – when burning coal is put in a container, these will burn the container before heating up the external environment. Anyone who comes near it will feel the heat. Similarly, if one keeps ice in a vessel, it will first cool the vessel before cooling the external environment. This is the unchangeable law of nature. Just like fire, when a person is angry, he first becomes the victim of his own anger before spreading vibrations of agitation and heat in the environment. All those who come in contact with this person feel the agitation. This is the expression or nature of a mind dwelling in ignorance manifesting itself. As soon as one distances oneself from the burning coals, the heat will subside. Whenever we generate defilements in our mind, it inevitably results in agitation’; one begins to understand this absolute truth. Initially one observes the event or events that take place outside and sees those events as the cause of his anger, jealousy, animosity, etc. As he matures on the path, he disengages himself from events and focuses attention on what happens within when he gets angry. He begins to see that in such situations he burns with agitation and unhappiness. As he continues to watch within and understand this fundamental reality of Dharma, his nature and behavior starts changing.

Let me share a Hindu Mythological story with you all (from the Internet) -

Goddess Kali is regarded as the most fierce and destructive form of Shakti. She has a dark complexion, red eyes and has four arms. In one of her hands, She carries a sword (khadaga) and in the hand, she carries the decapitated head of a demon. The other two hands are in the position of blessing Her devotees. She also wears a garland of heads of the demons She has killed which makes this form of the Goddess even more fearful and divine.

Apart from all her fierce looks, you will also see that the tongue of the Goddess is always out. The most important part is that the Goddess is shown as stepping over the chest of Lord Shiva, who is her husband. This episode of Goddess Kali stepping over Lord Shiva has an interesting story behind it. So, would you like to know why Kali stepped on Shiva's chest? Then, read on: Story Of Rakta Beej

There was once a very powerful demon known as Rakta Beej who had acquired a boon that he could duplicate himself as soon as his drop of blood touched the Earth. Due to this boon, the Gods were unable to bring the notorious demon under control. Hence, Shakti in the form of Goddess Durga was summoned to kill the demon. Armed with all the weapons, the Goddess charged at the demon. But as soon as she wounded him with her sword and his blood fell on Earth, the demon kept on multiplying. Huge armies of Rakta Beej were formed by the puddles of blood that fell on Earth. Enraged by this, the Devi took the fierce form of Kali. Then she went on to destroy the demon with a sword in her hand. She would slay each demon and drink his blood immediately. Soon she finished the whole army of Rakta Beej and only the real Rakta Beej was left. Then she slays him and drank all his blood till he fell down lifeless.

It is said that the Goddess became mad with blood lust after this incident. She started dancing the dance of destruction and forgot that she had already killed the demon. She kept on slaying the innocent after that. Seeing this, the Gods became extremely worried and approached Lord Shiva for help. Only Shiva had the power to stop Kali at this stage.

So, Lord Shiva went and lay down among the corpses where the Goddess was dancing. Accidentally, Kali stepped on Shiva and soon she realized her mistake. It is then her tongue immediately came out of embarrassment and she calmed down. She was ashamed that her blood lust had prevented her from recognizing her own husband. Thus, she came back to her original form and the destruction was stopped.

Shiva lying at Kali's feet also symbolizes the supremacy of Nature over man. It clearly shows that without Kali or Shakti even a powerful force like Lord Shiva is inert. Hence, Kali is shown as stepping on Shiva's chest. 

Now let's look at this story from our inner perspective: Our miseries and joy are like Rakta Beej. In our daily life, if we focus our attention on the pain, negativity, worries, anxieties, fear we provide very fertile land for these thoughts to grow similarly if we focus on all good things in our life, we provide very fertile land for these thoughts to manifest. Through these 10 days, while observing sensations throughout the body, understanding their nature, and developing equanimity by learning not to react and be objective while feeling pain and vibrations is the key.

• Physical Ailments are Manifestations of Mind: All physical ailments are the manifestation of mind. The disease is firstborn in mind and then over a period of time takes shape and form on the body. Let's take an example of any negative feeling, anger, etc, during these times we are in a miserable state, our mind is unstable hence we start overeating or not eating at all. In both cases we are not eating food properly; over a period of time associated issues like sleep disorders, puffy eyes start to become a regular affair, and finally, mental ailment starts showing up on our body parts the weakest body part first which at times may turn chronic as well.

We must love, not just those who by accident or choice but upon our lives, but love the potential for awakening that stirs within every life form so that we can glimpse in the turmoil around us the possibility of an upward-reaching nature.

Hence be aware of your enemies, friends and Mental perfections

Bhavatu Sabba Mangalam - May all beings be Happy!

Homage to the Buddha:

Such truly is he: free from impurities, Having destroyed all mental defilements, Fully enlightened by his own efforts, Perfect in theory and in practice, Having reached the final goal, Knowing the entire universe, Incomparable trainer of men, Teacher of gods and human,

The Buddha, the Exalted One.

I will continue to explore this unique relationship between mind and body! Kindly share your experiences and let's continue this beautiful journey life!

Disclaimer: I am not a regular Vipassana meditator.