Things hardly anyone knows about me.

I do what I do because I spent a large amount of my life not believing in myself, which led me to read over 3000 books out of desperation. 

I now use what I learned to help transform the lives of others which ironically was what allowed me to change mine.

I cry at sad films. When I watched “A Field of dreams” I wept so much that my wife thought there was something wrong with me. 

The scene that did it was the one where he asked his father if he wanted to play catch.

I spent many years wondering how I would feel when my father died. 

I thought there were only two possible options. 

1. That I would be freed from him. 

2. That I would be devastated 

As it turned out I was devastated but not for the reasons I thought. I was devastated because somewhere within me at age 42 I was still waiting for him to be a father to me. 

But now he never would be. 

I still weep for my father.

As time has gone by, I miss the family members I’ve lost more and more, and I think I’ve only really come to appreciate them since they have been gone. I wish I’d noticed the special things about them more than I had noticed their faults.

I don’t recall anyone ever using the word love, but I made sure that I told the family members who were dying how much I loved them before they passed. I didn’t get to say it to everyone. The ones I did wept and told me they loved me too.

It took me ten years from the time I decided to be a motivational speaker to give my first speech because I didn’t believe I had anything worth saying.

I feel guilty because I promised my children when they were little that I would build them a big house with a high wall around it with gates. I said I was going to get them a swimming pool with a curly slide and stables for their ponies. 

I didn’t do it but found out years later that the reason I wanted the high walls was to protect them from the abuse I suffered as a child and to surround them with an impenetrable wall of protection.

I managed to do that; the mind has its own way of telling us what needs to be done.

I discovered the secret to ending procrastination when I was 12 years old as I sat on the starting line of a dirt bike race terrified. It works and it is psychologically proven to work. 

I won the British sand racing championship round in Jersey in 1985 after taking three years off. 

That year the British championship was over 12 rounds all over the UK. Up until then the British championship was over just one event in Jersey. If I had come back a year earlier, I would have been the British champion.

I ranked as the top 1% of salespeople in the world.

I beat cancer in 2012 after being misdiagnosed twice eventually self-diagnosing. I had less than a 20% chance of survival and a 90% chance of a brain tumour within a year if I lived that long. 

It was fourteen months before I was eventually diagnosed for a cancer that was so aggressive that it needed to be diagnosed and treated within 4/6 weeks. I have been clear 10 years and there isn’t any record of anyone making it to five years with my prognosis.

I beat cancer primarily by using the techniques I had learned to overcome the abuse I Suffered as a child. 

Ironically if it hadn’t been for what happened to me, I would never have learned the things I did so my father actually caused me to learn the things that would one day be the largest factor on my survival.

I am grateful to him for that.

I wrote my book “An unbreakable spirit” in 30 days. I had to write it that fast as chemotherapy affected my memory so badly, I had to write nonstop so I wouldn’t forget what I had written.

I survived three attempts on my life. (When two of them are by family members you get a little paranoid )

I founded the coaching industry in Jersey, and it was 8 years before another coach set up.

I tried to join the parachute regiment when I was 18 but was denied as I had been in too much trouble. 

I was told if I stayed out of trouble for 12 months they would reconsider. I went back a year later but was refused for a minor speeding offence.

One of the people I admire most in the world is my mother . She worked morning noon and night and endured physical and mental abuse rather than break up her family.

I met my wife on March 10th 1990.

When I saw her for the very first time I knew she was going to be my wife and she hadn't even noticed me yet.

The next day we went for a walk and talked about the things we wanted from life including children.

We got engaged 28 days after we met on April 11th

Got married on July 26th (Same year).

Our first daughter Chloé was a honeymoon baby.

This year we have been married thirty-three years.

Or as my wife would say,

Tirty tree years, she's Irish.

Moral of the story.

Never give up on your dreams.

What you want, wants you.

But no one ever said it would be easy.

But it's definitely worthwhile.

#resilience #mentalhealth #business #inspiration #motivation