Tie Your Shoes

How often did we hear our parents say, "tie your shoes"? Was it simply because they didn't want us to trip over our laces and fall down? Not according to Marc Gellman, author of a wonderful little book called Always Wear Clean Underwear.

Every chapter is another saying that we heard over and over again as children. "Take out the garbage", "stand up straight", "clean your plate", "always wear clean underwear". Gellman explains that everything our parents nagged us about had a little meaning and a bigger meaning. When our parents said, "tie your shoes," we thought it meant so we wouldn't fall down. What they were really telling us, says Gellman, is bigger than that: finish what you start. Your parents wanted you to learn that when you do a job you should do it the best that you can.

As adults so many of us don't "tie our shoes." My coaching clients most often want help to stay focused so they can complete projects and do their best. That's the biggest challenge they face. Many of us are so unfocused that we have many projects we are juggling at the same time and don't finish what we start.

I have a note on my computer that reads, "I do complete work". I need it as a daily reminder. As an entrepreneur I am constantly thinking of new projects. A book idea, a new workshop, an idea for my website, a new coaching group and on and on. In the past if I were in the middle of a book and a new one was suggested to me, I'd buy it and start reading it immediately. I would often find myself in the middle of two or three books at the same time. I didn't have my shoelaces tied. Now I do complete work. Sometimes it's a challenge, but I won't start a new book or project until the one I am working on is complete. Doing complete work saves time in the long run and gives you the clarity you need to work on the next project.

Do you start on a marketing plan and get sidetracked and never complete it? If you paint without a primer or wash your car without polishing it, you will save time, but it will have to be done again sooner. If you wash your car, use long-lasting polish, vacuum the inside and do a complete job; it is personally fulfilling and it lasts a lot longer. Are there unfinished projects in your basement or garage? Think about how good it will feel to complete the projects you start. Have you ever started writing a book, or composing a song or building a birdhouse? Is there an unfinished craft somewhere in your house? Is there a dent in your car you've been meaning to get fixed? Is there course work that you never completed to get a degree?

Are you in the middle of preparing proposals for three clients? Is there a project that you keep starting and stopping? Think about the unfinished projects in your life and your business and how good it would feel to complete them. Make a commitment to do complete work. It is such an energy drain when you have unfinished business. And yet, the fastest way to double your energy level is to complete something.

I have a client who got married months ago, but never sent out thank-you notes for her gifts. Every time she looked at the box of notes it really bothered her. She made a commitment to me that she would mail them out within one week. She told me what a relief it was for her to finish the project that had been hanging over her head. She said she felt so much lighter. We drain our own energy by not completing things we start.

Isn't it time we all learned to tie our shoes? After all, untied shoes affects our relationships as well. Sometimes there are things we need to say and we don't say them. But the words are still "on our mind". That's called an incompletion. The feelings don't go away and this builds resentment in us. The resentments drain us of energy. If we do complete work we express our feelings at the time and are honest in our relationships.

To do "complete work" means that everything you do is so thorough that nothing about it will come back to bite you. So in the end what your parents were telling you wasn't simply to tie your shoes so you wouldn't trip and fall. What they were really saying was focus on your tasks and finish what you start. I guess they did know best after all.