Tuesdays with Angèle

Once in a while, I love to slow down, to have a look at my whole life, to review what I have done until now. For me, it's non-sense to walk in our path of life without stopping a bit, take our breath and reflect on what was our accomplishments, what is the goal of all this. If we miss those moments, we are lost because we cannot see brightly where it leads, and if our lives could, in the end, have a meaning, for us and others.

Despite my mistakes - I commit a few in English and hopefully Grammarly could be of great help - I go forward, this world goes so fast and I try to follow my own pace. And also to look sometimes on the rear-view mirror, to send gratitude on all these moments and people that were breathtaking. And today I would like to honor the presence of Angèle in my life and share you a bit of our story.

I met her the first time twelve years ago, she needed someone to fix something in her house, I don't know if it was the sink, toilet or washing machine, and my dad - a kind of MacGyver - was there to help her. They met more often, and started a sweet but distant love relationship, seeing each other from time to time. Months after, I got the chance to meet her and a year later her whole family, including her brother. Although I was thirty-five years younger, she was always greeting me during my visits, when I came, sharing some cute moments with the family. She was a mother, grandmother, neighbor, friend, and on top of that, an outstanding cook and a great humble soul.

During all those years, I met Angèle from time to time, three to six times per month, after the office hours, or even between when I was unemployed for almost four years. I shared with her my joys, my wins, my pain, my fatigue, my lack of purpose, my enthusiasm and frustrations, all these emotions that could happen during a lifetime. And she did the same with me. Enjoying Spring and Summer moments in her garden, and having a warm space in the kitchen for Autumn and Winter. And sometimes each year, seeing her brother in the south, sharing unforgettable Christmas moments. For me, it was a pure blessing and I wanted to continue these moments, giving also some presents, and my presence, my light.

The title of my article 'Tuesdays with Angèle' comes from purpose, from the book of Mitch Albom that he has written to honor the life (and interviews with Ted Koppel) of Morrie Schwartz. Angèle was not Morrie, and I had the blessing to meet her for twelve years. However, I knew it wouldn't last forever. As we know when we were born, we couldn't know when our lives would end, and two years ago in June 2017, when I met Angèle on an amazing Summer afternoon, and later when I received a nice voice message from her to wish me happy birthday on 21st June, at that time I was way to imagine that it would be the last time I could see her ... smiling and healthy.

Summer pass, July, August... no news. In September I was informed she went to the hospital, that she was in bad state and was in coma for three weeks. October passed... November I was informed she was back at home, and when I came to see her... All changed. It was a different person, looking older, weaker, difficult to move. In five months of time, I came to see another Angèle. For me, it was a pure shock! It was cancer, and probably also the effects of chemotherapy... She was not the same physically, and her soul was still shining but without any hope in her eyes. She knew the end was near. She tried the best she could.

Although I gave her more space, and also space for her children/great children, I wanted to continue to see her, to support her during her last moments. December, January, February passed, and it was sooooooo painful to see her decaying as a flower... March, last days, last moments, and she transitioned to the non-physical peacefully, during the night. *Read me well, I really don't like to use this word - d e a t h - it's such a burden one!*

From that final message I received from one of her daughters, I knew that I wouldn't be able again to continue my 'Tuesdays with Angèle' moments. No more Angèle to meet, to laugh, to share a coffee and some chocolates with... We all came in those moments, with our (grand)parents. And we all know that it was, is and will always be the case. Our bodies are limited in time, we rent them and we leave. And she left 20 months ago, as it was the case of my mom 366 months ago. And since last time I came to pass aside her house, another family lives in, probably not knowing Angèle or that she left inside.

You might find this article counterproductive inside LinkedIn, I don't care. It is not about writing what please others or always professional content. It is not about me going to the Psy and sharing my life in order to have some pills or some pats on my shoulder... It is about looking at the most important moments of our lives. They don't stand in front of our laptops making slideshows or reports, they don't fit in front of an audience of CEOs, stakeholders, trying to convince about our dream or - more often - the dreams of others that we follow in order to have our monthly paycheck.

It is about living, all together, in this gorgeous - but decaying - planet, spreading our light, enjoying -yes- 'basic' but so important moments with the people that we like, that we surround ourselves with. Finding our purpose, which is NOT to gain power, gain money, be on the top of others and compete to be the 'best' of the world squeezing others like lemons. But rather, to realize what is our purpose, what makes us really happy to wake up each morning, what blessings of this day we can express before we go to sleep. And knowing that our time is so limited, that we have to make good use of it, and to realize that spending some of this time with our 'Angèle' is a-b-s-o-l-u-t-e-l-y not a loss of time at all.

This is the reason that, although I have to earn enough money to feed myself and continue my life, I have already earned my life the day I was born, that I find more purpose in spending some time on things that I really enjoy, connecting with my fellow human brothers and sisters, by instance in going on Thursdays, as often I could, to the PTPI Coffee Morning, which I know since almost four years and that was one of the most important moments of my life at that time, when I lost my purpose.

Feel free to share your 'Tuesdays with Angèle' moments, to give me feedback, to connect with me, not especially here in LinkedIn but around a coffee, in reality, where all the most important moments of our lives make sense.

Thank you for reading, wishing you a very nice weekend and amazing end of year. If there is less light in the sky now, this is to remind us to open our own inner lights.