The Value of Disagreements

I recently watched a TED talk (Dare to Disagree) about how important disagreements can be for finding the best solutions to big problems and avoiding the consequences of bad ideas that aren’t thoroughly examined.

It’s easy to shy away from arguments and controversy—or to just go along with the most insistent voices. That can be a major mistake for a team or company. Looking for weaknesses or alternatives before adopting an idea often leads to a better decision.

It’s far better to recognize problems early and find ways to work around them than to all agree at the beginning and regret it later!

I want to discuss WHY disagreements matter, WHAT aspects of a proposal need to be considered, and HOW to disagree productively in meetings in English at your workplace or online.

Why it’s important to consider different points of view

It’s great when someone suggests an elegant solution to a long-standing problem in your company or community. However, if no one feels free to look at it critically, it’s possible to miss complications that may not be obvious at first but could cause serious problems in the long term.

When a team takes the time to explore all the ramifications of a decision, they may also see ways to improve the proposal or even develop a better alternative.

One of the advantages of a team that works well together is that you can benefit from the different experiences and perspectives of other team members. If there are several possible solutions, teammates may see different ratios of benefits compared to risks. People with different skills may find certain aspects especially important—or even find that a new tool won’t work at all for some people or in some situations.

I loved the example of collaboration as creative conflict given in that TED talk. Dr. Alice Stewart had found clear evidence that taking X-rays of pregnant women was causing cancer in many children—but most doctors didn’t believe it. What helped Dr. Stewart keep fighting was her partner’s work. He was a statistician with a very different outlook. He saw his job as looking for any flaws in her research and arguments. When he couldn’t find any, that increased her confidence in her research.

What issues may need discussion

When your team is considering a proposal or possible project, it’s important to consider how it will affect your current commitments. How much time and money might it require? What other resources will it take? Will you need to postpone or cut back on current projects to pursue it? What are the possible trade-offs and the risks vs. benefits, and who might be hurt by those decisions?

Again, it’s important to hear different perspectives, especially from those who will be most affected. If you see an important point being missed or a group being ignored, it can make a big difference if you speak up for them.

How to disagree constructively in English and avoid unnecessary stress or negative feelings

1. Don’t let the disagreements get personal or criticize your opponents—stick to your objections to their ideas.

2. Keep the tone calm and professional.

3. Sometimes questions can be less provocative than statements. For example:

·        Do you have some evidence for that?

·        Mark, could you elaborate on that? (or provide more details?)

·        What’s the deadline for finishing this—and what will we need to cut to make it work?

·        Sandra, what might go wrong if we implement this? How could we avoid or resolve those problems?

·        What are the potential consequences if we just ignore this issue?

·        Alex, why is your proposal better than Jim’s?

·        Could we adapt Juanita’s proposal to make it more affordable?

4. If you’re leading the discussion, try to include everyone affected in the discussion, especially those who might hesitate to speak up when some people are dominating the discussion. (Even if you’re not leading the meeting, you could ask someone who looks like they want to speak about their opinion.)

I’d love to hear your experiences with constructive disagreements. What has helped your team work through problems and disagreements? What approaches work (or don’t work)?