We laughed, we cried, we jabbed ... we dared to hope

Well, that was one boring week. Did anything happen? Pity this poor would be columnist, bereft of news upon which to comment. You'll have to forgive me for falling back on some random musings that may or may not relate to something that happened this week.

The Optimists Remain Confident (provided women keep schtum)

In a continuing saga, the organisers of the Tokyo Olympics are still insisting that the games will go ahead. That is, of course, if they manage to keep those annoying women from joining meetings & nattering away, wasting time as Yoshiro Mori kindly explained earlier in the week.

No mater that over in Australia, where they are trying to organise a competition involving just one sport, a hotel janitor tested positive, leading to more than 500 players, coaches and the like being slapped back into quarantine.

It's fine, though, because the organisers of Tokyo 2020 (as it will continue to be known since they're printed all the merchandise and the whole shebang is very much about flogging merchandise) have a grand plan. Spectators will be banned from singing and chanting.

Thinking about it, that's probably where we went wrong back in the Spring of last year. Good old Boris telling us to wash our hands whilst singing happy birthday. If only he'd left out the signing bit the first wave might never have happened.

And the Nobel Peace Prize goes to ...

We don't actually know yet but here are my nominations. Spot the real one (ie. the one that has ACTUALLY) been nominated:

• Alexei Navalny - for his tremendous bravery, returning to Russia despite being poisoned in his underpants (literally) because he cares about standing up to corruption
• Usrula Von Der Leyen - for miraculously uniting the leaders of all 27 EU member states AND the UK in agreeing on something for once (that invoking article 16 was a bad move, requiring an immediate climbdown)
• Nicola Sturgeon - for doggedly pursuing the case for Scottish independence with a vigour and determination that William Wallace (AKA Braveheart) would have been proud of, without spilling an ounce of blood and NEVER having a hair out of place
• Jared Kuschner - for flying to the Middle East a few times and getting countries who are not actually at war with each other to chat a bit more

Yep. You got it. No doubt if old Jared doesn't win it will be because it's been stolen from him and Donald will have a hissy fit and refuse to go the party.

Goodbye to a legend

Did you shed a tear? I have to confess I welled up a little. Captain Sir Tom Moore passed away. What a legend. In his 100th year, he managed to get himself a knighthood, bagged a number one hit, appeared on the cover of GQ, met the Queen, raised almost £40m for the NHS, was honoured with an RAF fly-past and received an all expenses paid trip to Barbados. And all because he decided to walk round his garden with a zimmer frame.

With a lovely twinkle in his eye.

The Swedes might have Greta circumnavigating the globe without using any fossil fuels but she does always look a bit serious. Don't think being on her boat would have been a whole load of laughs. We, on the other hand, have Captain Tom. Walking up and down his garden with his carbon neutral Zimmer frame, with a twinkle in his eye. What's not to love.

Boo hoo shucks to you

Another piece of sad news this week came with the announcement that Asos and Boohoo are buying the bulk of the remaining Top Shop and Debenhams brands. Taking them online, obviously, leaving bales of hay blowing through what's left of the high street.

Actually, I have a prediction. (ALERT, as I may have written in previous newsletters I know ABSOLUTELY NOTHING and so you must never follow my advice). Asos and Boohoo will not thrive in the long term. Why do I say that? Well, my 18, soon to be 19 year old daughter is a dab hand at online shopping and she will have nothing to do with Asos or Boohoo.

She's of the Greta Thunberg persuasion and was horrified to learn about the working conditions and ethics that enable these companies to sell frocks for as little as 99p. Her generation does seem to care. About all sorts of stuff. Climate change, the environment, equality, racial injustice. I have a hunch that organisations or any kind that don't get this will have big problems on their hands in the future. Assuming we have a future.

Companies that Care

Sticking with the caring (warning - we are now moving onto the random musings section, so anyone with a craving for actual news might want to skip this bit), it's the lack of care thing that made me so upset about the Top Shop news.

A few years ago, when Deb and I were on our book tour (OK minor exaggeration but we did strong arm a friend into letting us do book talks at various Soho House establishments) I met a woman who worked at Top Shop. She invited us to go in to talk to some of the women who worked there about navigating non-linear careers, why you need to play the long game etc (so it really was a book tour, come to think of it).

Anyway, I can't tell you how giddy with excitement Deb and I were about going behind the scenes at Top Shop. Sent us into quite a spin thinking about what to wear to present to a bunch of women who'd be seriously into fashion and seriously a lot younger and trendier than us. And they were.

Seriously into fashion, that is. You could tell from the buzz in the offices, the way mood boards and samples were laid out everywhere, that this was a place where people really cared about what they did. They cared about fashion, about clothes. I don't think Philip Green ever cared about clothes or fashion. You only have to look at him in those photos on his yacht, or that ghastly one of him dressed as a Roman emperor. Not a stylish man. Suspect all he ever really cared about was money.

Cue the decline and fall of Top Shop. Led by Phillip in a toga. Fitting, really.

The Plague of Purpose

A long time ago, I had the absolute pleasure of working with another company where people really cared about what they did. Warburtons. They cared about baking bread. The best bread and baked goods you could possibly make.

I still remember now being lectured about how the flour had to be the very best quality and their passion for making sure that product was as perfect as possible by the time it hit a supermarket shelf. Which is why they own their own vans. You don't want any old delivery driver handling your carefully crafted super toastie.

Warburtons are still going strong, being experts in baking, upholding their strong family values.

This is entirely different from a new cult of "purpose" that I've noticed springing up everywhere you look. Companies whose purpose you thought should be pretty clear have all sorts of grandiose and, frankly ridiculous claims.

Such as, for example, the big audit firms. What we'd like them to care about? Giving people confidence that a company's accounts are sound. Isn't that their purpose? You'd hope so. Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you but that's not it at all. I just looked a couple up.

KPMG? To empower change. (Apart from being utterly meaningless this is terrible English)

'Empower (verb): to give (someone) the authority or power to do something

Change is an abstract noun. You can't give it authority for anything.

EY? Building a Better Working World. Did they construct the channel tunnel? Are they on the team to deliver HS2? Are they all over Cross Rail?

Maybe it's me and I'm being naive and they really do all this stuff. But in the meantime, who is making sure that companies' accounts can be trusted?

Margot Robbie in the Bath

OK, we're back to the news section. There's been a big fuss this week about some amateur investors using something on the internet to get together to make some money ... or were they trying to make sure some hotshots on Wall Street lost money? It was all about GameStop.

Not sure, I really couldn't follow the detail but, as if it was ever in doubt, by the end of the week, the little guys had their hands burnt and the hotshots on Wall Street are doing OK. I think. Cue lots of newspapers drawing diagrams to explain what "short selling" is but since none of these are anywhere near as entertaining as Margot Robbie in the bath, I though I'd share this.

I have to say I was in two minds about this. Shoe horning Margot Robbie in the bath into a film that was entirely about men making and losing lots of money, where the only ones with any dialogue and character were male, was clearly gratuitous and sexist. However, it gave her a bit of a break and she went on to play some absolutely fabulous roles, including the lead in I Tonya, so I'll go with it.

Jab, Jab, Jab Right Hook

That's actually the title of a book by Gary Vaynerchuck - subtitled "How to tell your story in a noisy social world". This isn't much of a challenge at the moment as there is only one story in town (hence the lack of news in this newsletter). Yes, it's the vaccine.

Delighted to say that here in the UK, we're jabbing away. And finally we have a number to look at every day that we do want to see increasing exponentially. You never know, they might even let us out of our houses soon.

White Rabbit Pops Up

Anyone seen Gavin this week? He's been very quiet lately, but then up he popped a couple of days ago to make an announcement that he'll be making an announcement. On 22nd February. And that he wants universities to begin to go back on or around 8th March.

Naughty Gavin has been a bit of a copycat, obviously, since this sounds remarkably like a timetable Boris announced for his own announcements, only his were about schools. Which used to be the remit of Gavin and his department for education, but obviously it was all getting a bit too much for him.

Anyway, aside from copying his homework, Gavin also hasn't spent an awful lot of time wooing the vice-chancellors and unions so I think we can safely say his predicted timetable will be wrong. And off he burrows again.

And in the real world

We're plodding on. As I mentioned last week, Steph, my business partner, and I have decided we can't wait for the pandemic to end so we're just going to plough on finding people jobs. When I say people it's true that we are totally open to helping men and women but it just so happens that the people whose careers tend to be derailed by having children do seem to be the female ones. And never more so than in the current situation.

Happily, it turns out the the saying that goes something like "there will always be a need for lawyers" turns out to be pretty true, so we're finding ourselves remarkably busy. Not so busy I don't have time to write an entirely pointless newsletter, obviously.

I just hope that a bit more happens next week. It's either that or you'll be getting my musings on some other aspect of corporate nonsense.

I'm watching: The Investigation (Danish, with subtitles, about the team who worked so hard to investigate the murder of journalist Kim Wall on a submarine. The perpetrator doesn't appear at all. Very clever).

I'm listening to: You're Wrong About (two American journalists explore how history has miscast an individual or event ... it's all a bit random & I love it)

I'm reading: NOTHING. Don't know about you but I just can't seem to concentrate on a book. Don't understand why not, it's not as if there are a million distractions out there. So please, if anyone could recommend a "cannot put this down" book - has to be fiction and not too much description - I would be immensely grateful