Wellbeing - made simple.

Wellbeing is a confusing area.

For a start, there's no consensus on how to even spell the word (see the cover image above). Anyone who's ever had anything to do with wellbeing will have had the "Is it wellbeing, well-being or well being?" dilemma.

I prefer wellbeing. I'm not saying it's correct, but it's just how I've always written it.

This uncertainty about how to spell it is also reflected in our uncertainty about what wellbeing actually is.

For many, it's a destination. A mythical place that we strive to get to and that we only stand any chance of reaching if we engage in (or pay for) an extensive and ever growing list of activities - gym membership, yoga classes, healthy diets, pampering ourselves at the spa, meaningful social interactions, time spent in nature, cultural experiences, mindfully engaging in our hobbies, stroking our cat or dog, to name but a few.

Whilst these are all great things to do - I believe that they all miss the mark and to some degree, cloud the issue, because wellbeing is NOT a destination. It's our starting point.

Wellbeing is nature's greatest gift to mankind. We all come into this world jam-packed full of wellbeing. The ability to feel good, happy, contented and peaceful. In the moment and at one - physically, psychologically, emotionally and spiritually at ease - with ourselves and with our little bit of the world around us.

Wellbeing occurs automatically in the absence of unmet needs.

We see this state of pure wellbeing often in young children. As long as they're not tired, hungry, cold, bored or insecure - they're just fully happy.

And that ability to experience profound wellbeing stays with us right throughout our lives. The difference for us though is that, unlike young children whose needs are relatively simple, our sense of wellbeing gets suppressed or masked, hidden behind layer after layer of stress, responsibility, worry, and all the emotional scars and issues (all the unmet needs) that we pick up as we travel through life.

Occasionally, we forget about all those things - on an amazing holiday, totally absorbed in a good book, enthralled by a great play, lost in the sheer joy of spending time with old friends - and then almost inevitably, sometime later, our minds wander back to the challenges and issues in our lives and the overwhelming weight and number of those once again suppress our wellbeing.

Don't buy what you've already got!

So yes, join a gym, pamper yourself, and mindfully engage in your hobbies - these are all brilliant things to do, but, if you have major issues or challenges in your life (and, let's face it, who doesn't 🥴) going to the gym three times a day, or spending every weekend at a spa, won't make any difference.

That's what I see all too often with my high net worth clients - when money is no object, it's very tempting to just throw more cash at an ever more expensive list of activities in search of the mythical feeling of wellbeing, whilst behind the scenes what they may really need is to do is address that long-standing issue with a family member, or resolve their feelings of inadequacy that started at school, or overcome a traumatic experience they've had, to cite a few random examples.

The only real way to experience lasting wellbeing is to address the issues, challenges and blocks in your life. That may be straightforward to do, or it may be complex but finding a way to resolve or move on or let those issues go - that's the way to experience true wellbeing.

So, wellbeing is a confusing area, partly because it doesn't fit neatly into one single box in our minds, and partly because everyone has their own individual idea about what wellbeing means to them, all entirely subjective and all as valid as the next.

In light of the above, my titular theme of 'Wellbeing - made simple' seems contradictory, but I'd encourage you to remember this simple concept - wellbeing is our default setting, when all our needs are met, all our worries and issues are resolved, what we then experience without any effort whatsoever is true wellbeing.

Wellbeing happens automatically in the absence of unmet needs.

Leave No Stone Unturned

On a separate but related note, I've noticed that whilst most people will try to move heaven and earth to fulfil their job role commitments or resolve a work-related problem, such as completing a big project on time or finishing an important report by a deadline, often going above and beyond what is required to get the job done to the best of their abilities, and yet those same people will make little or no effort and show little or no determination to address issues from their personal lives, that, in the grand scheme of things, are far more important.

When I ask 'Have you read a book on....?' or 'Have you contacted a therapist? or 'Have you had a look on Youtube?' they often look at me, amazed it seems, that those options are available to them. It's like they have a blind spot when it comes to their own emotional health and wellbeing.

With that in mind, are there issues in your life that you should be addressing? Issues that, once resolved, would allow you to experience your naturally occurring sense of wellbeing? 😇

DATA, DATA, DATA it's all about the DATA

I can wholeheartedly recommend a simple but very clever Wellbeing App that empowers the employees in your company to regularly score the different aspects of their wellbeing via the App.

It also provides an easy way of delving deeper into what issues they're struggling with, what the barriers are to them dealing with those issues, and what solutions they would most like to have access to that you and I, working together, can provide for them - many of them zero cost options that can be organised internally.

The anonymised data provided by your employees drives the process and makes mental health part of the conversation in your organisation so that wellbeing becomes an everyday reality for you and your colleagues.

It's simple to set up and could be helping you to improve your colleagues' wellbeing and mental health within days and the ROI is brilliant as it costs less than the price of a fancy coffee per employee per month. ☕️

Talking of coffee, if you'd like to know more why not arrange a 15-minute Coffee Break Catch Up with me by clicking on this link: Chat with Jon

Who is The Wellbeing Guy?

My name's Jon Bockelmann-Evans and I've been an international speaker, thought-leader, trainer and clinician for nearly 25 years, helping people (and the organisations they work for) to cope, thrive and succeed despite the many challenges life sends their way.

In my 20s I was a musician in Wales' only ever Welsh language heavy metal band (I don't even speak Welsh) and we toured the world (improbable but true). I trained as a physiotherapist when I was 30, then shortly after as a psychotherapist and so began my love of mind/body medicine as I helped clients recover from stress-related conditions in a specialist clinic in the NHS.

In 2,000 I started running training courses. Two years later I left the NHS and formed JBE Health. Then shortly after buying a house with my girlfriend I was diagnosed with testicular cancer. Radical surgery and chemo followed as did months of recovery, with no income, in a house we couldn't afford, with my business in tatters, whilst waiting to hear whether the cancer had spread to my lungs or brain.

It was during those dark times that I formulated the idealogy that underpins everything I do now, blending physiology, psychology and personal development into a unique combination of techniques, concepts, strategies and processes that got me through the toughest period of my life and that have helped thousands of individuals since.

I'm pleased to say I made a full recovery as the cancer hadn't spread. Within a year my girlfriend and I were married and a year after that the first of two wonderful children arrived. My business has gone from strength to strength, taking me all over the world to work with clients such as Nike, Dow, EE, ConocoPhillips, County Councils, SMEs, FE Colleges and hundreds of schools of all varieties.