What Construction is Made Of

"...perception is reality..." a statement that still resonates deeply. I remember hearing this for the first time, like it was yesterday, but it was 26 years ago. A statement, made in passing and etched on my brain for a lifetime, so it appears. I don't remember the topic of discussion. I don't remember the context. I don't associate a feeling of guilt or shame, so I assume it wasn't a "lesson" intended for me. We never really know the moments that will stick with us or the impact they will have, however, this was a defining moment in my life as a leader (and parent).

This one statement I see as the starting point for everything I learned in managing people and relationships in all of my future endeavours. It was also the starting point for developing the skills I needed to initiate hard conversations, to respond to emotionally heightened people and turn unhappy customers into five star reviews. Although I see this as the starting point, it wasn't something I fully understood the breadth and depth of when I first started contemplating it with, "...what does that even mean?"

In our industry, we spend a lot of time talking about what to do, how to measure success, and what strategies will get us ahead. Don’t get me wrong - these are important - it's what makes our industry what it is. However, I think we need to step back and ask ourselves a different question - What really makes a business successful in the construction industry? Because if it were only these things, I think our industry would be a lot more successful than it is.

When we strip away the spreadsheets, workflows, and KPIs, success in our industry - or any industry, for that matter, boils down to one thing: people. Partners, team members, clients, trade partners, vendors, suppliers, inspectors, consultants - all of the people, all of the relationships we rely on to operate. Every single interaction, every deal, every project revolves around people. So what does it take to build strong relationships? Great question. Here are some ideas you can consider:

Authenticity: Be Genuine and Real

Although "authenticity" seems to be overused and misunderstood these days, reaching a point where you can be truly authentic around people, is a game-changer when it comes to connecting and building strong relationships. People can sense when you're being insincere or putting on a front. Strong relationships start with authenticity, showing up as your true self and being honest about your intentions. Authenticity builds trust, and trust is the foundation for meaningful connection. Don’t try to be someone you’re not. Instead, focus on being reliable, consistent, and true to your word.

Empathy: Seek to Understand Others

This is the primary trait I found gave me success in hard conversations. Empathy means stepping into someone else’s shoes and seeing the world from their perspective. Their perception is their reality. What are their challenges, motivations, and fears? By taking the time to understand what drives others, you create a deeper connection. Empathy shows you care, and people are far more likely to trust and respect someone who demonstrates genuine concern for their well-being.

Communication: Be Clear, Open, and Honest

The key to good communication isn’t just being a good talker, it's being a good listener. Be present and actively listen to others, showing that their input matters. Communicate openly, with honesty and transparency, even when the conversation is difficult. Clear communication eliminates misunderstandings and fosters a culture of mutual respect and collaboration. When determining your approach to the conversation, understanding where the other person is coming from is key to delivering a message that will be heard by them.

Consistency: Show Up and Follow Through

Trust grows when people know they can count on you and in our industry, this is huge. With a reputation for being non-responsive, late and all 'round poor communicators, understanding and conquering this one thing will differentiate you in this industry. Being consistent means showing up when you say you will, delivering on promises, and being dependable in every interaction. Inconsistency erodes trust and weakens relationships, so make sure your actions align with your words every single time.

Mutual Respect: Value the Other Person

Strong relationships are built on mutual respect. Respect others’ time, opinions, and expertise. Show appreciation for their contributions and acknowledge their efforts. By treating everyone - from clients to employees to suppliers - with respect, you create an environment where collaboration thrives and relationships grow.

Building strong relationships in business is the foundation of success. The key to that success is understanding others through empathy, clear communication, and a willingness to see through their lens, even if we don’t agree. By acknowledging their perspective and responding authentically, we can build trust, dissolve tension, and foster meaningful connections that lead to stronger collaboration. However, building strong relationships and getting to this point doesn’t happen overnight. It requires intentionality, effort, and the willingness to invest in others. It requires patience, understanding and being consistent, knowing over time, trust will grow.