What kind of relationship do you have?
Kortay Powell
Helping people navigate the misrepresented world of health insurance | Health Insurance Agent | Small Business Owner Health Insurance | Travel Insurance | Healthcare Coverage
Hey there, friends!
This week we're talking about relationships. I know that we have a lot of them, and that they can be a huge source of joy—and disappointment. We've all been there before, and we all want to avoid it happening again.
I want to talk about how you can navigate those personal relationships and work relationships so that everyone gets what they need. And we'll end with a little something to get your brain buzzing: why sometimes discomfort can be good for us.
Let’s start with the basics: give-and-take. This is a huge concept in every relationship. If someone is always giving but not getting back, that's when things start to feel weird and uncomfortable. If someone is always taking but not contributing anything, that's also going to feel weird and uncomfortable!
Relationships are where we learn to give and take, where we get uncomfortable and grow from it, where we learn to be vulnerable with one another and feel safe in our vulnerability. So many of us have been taught that vulnerability is a weakness, but it's actually one of the greatest strengths we can have as human beings. It allows us to connect with each other on a deeper level.
The phrase give-and-take is:
“the practice of making mutual concessions : COMPROMISE”
Personal Relationships
In personal relationships, give-and-take requires two people to make a compromise, usually through a mutual exchange of ideas or comments. Personal relationships are a lot more involved than work-related relationships. As Grant Cardone would say,
“A relationship is like a business… you’ve got to work at it every single day. You got to try new things and see what works. You need to be willing to take risks and compromise. You’ve got to do things that will make you uncomfortable and always aim to grow.” (Grant Cardone)
In a personal relationship you usually have a deep sense of who you are connecting with and their values. As humans, we all have different views and values so you should never expect anyone to agree with what you say or do. Rather than being uncomfortable and dismissive because a person has a different view than you, the individual should be open to listening and coming to a compromise. That doesn’t mean you have to agree with what the person said or did rather give them the space to express themselves. Relationships require everyday work to maintain. You might have to get a dog when you hate dogs, or maybe tell your friend your feelings even though you know they will disagree. The bottom line is that sometimes you might have to give a little love, listening ear, or do something you are completely uncomfortable with to maintain a healthy relationship. This mutual exchange between two people causes mental and personal growth.
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Work Relationships
Work relationships, I argue, are very similar to personal ones. Not all work relationships are personal, but they are relationships built on give-and-take. When you have a great work relationship, it's not just about getting along with your co-workers or bosses—it's about knowing that you're doing something meaningful with your life and having someone who helps support that. A person gives their assistance to another co-worker or boss, and in return he/she gives their assistance in helping to achieve the company or the person's ultimate goal.
One of my favorite parts about working is being able to work with different people on a daily basis. My job is a perfect example of a give-and-take, particularly the relationship I develop with potential clients and customers. When I reach out to potential clients, the other person doesn’t know my values and may feel as though I am waisting their time. My biggest fear is to waste someones time so I to give valuable information, which will lead to a compromise of ideas. I might disagree with what someone says however, listening to their concerns is most important. I give them a listening ear and they share their thoughts, it's that simple.
I also work with a couple of colleagues who share valuable information with me so when I have something helpful to them I make sure I let them know. Without a mutual exchange of ideas, then one of us would feel as though we are in a one-sided relationship. When a person is in a work relationship with someone and doesn't put forth much effort, it can be easy for a person to start feeling as though they are being taking advantage of. When a person does that—when they take without giving—they create an imbalance that drains the other person of their energy and makes them feel like they're not being respected or valued. So let's make sure that we're giving as much as we take. Sometimes it might feel like our work relationships are the only thing that connects us, but they're not! We have each other—and that means we have something to give each other.
Today, I challenge you to start looking at your interactions with others as opportunities for growth. Instead of being passive or avoiding discomfort in your interactions with others, actively seek out ways that you can help them grow as people—and then let them help YOU grow! As much as possible, try not to take things personal—it will only make your life more difficult. Look at every interaction as an opportunity to learn something new about yourself or someone else!
This is Kortay Powell, Live from the 6
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