What's Your Story?

A woman on a recent Zoom call said, "This is the worst year of my life." Several others agreed. They talked about the isolation from not being able to go out in public. How much they missed their friends and family. The stress of home-schooling their kids while trying to tele-commute and do business online all day. How tired they were of being quarantined and stuck at home. How upset they've been about politics, racial injustice, conspiracy theories.

When it was my turn, I shared Tara Conklin's quote, "Your greatest work of art is the story you tell about yourself." Her insight really opened my eyes to the fact that while I can't control a lot of what happened this year, I can control the stories I tell about it. And I'm not going to let Covid19 hijack 2020.

Instead of saying how much I miss my son Tom and his family in Houston and how sad I am not to be able to see them, I will remind myself I have been able to see them anytime I want on Zoom. I got to e-visit their new home, e-meet the dog they were fostering, e-read their favorite books with them, and e-experience bike rides through their neighborhood.

Instead of thinking about being quarantined and stuck at home, I will focus on how grateful I am that my loved ones and I have all been safe at home and are healthy.

Instead of missing speaking at conferences and the travel adventures I used to have, I will remind myself how fortunate I am to still be able to write, work with clients virtually, and host online book clubs that many participants told me were a lifeline these past few months.

So, here's the question. What's your story about 2020?

Are events hijacking the stories you tell about this year? You may have had tragic things happen. You have lost loved ones, lost jobs, lost businesses, so it's certainly understandable.

And are there other stories your rather tell about this year? Other stories you want to tell and remember? Stories about what was right rather than what was wrong?

How about the new year? Are you letting uncertainty or fears hijack your projections for 2021? Could you counteract that by choosing to tell stories about what you want to happen, something you want to work towards, something you're looking forward to?

Simply said, when we change our stories, we change our life - for good.

If this idea resonates, don't just do this for yourself. Do it for people you care about.

Get out your calendar right now. Pick a day and time you're going to have an online Review-Preview. How about Thursday, Dec. 31 at lunch or dinner time? How about make this a virtual send-off to 2020 and a virtual welcome to the 2021?

You may not be able to gather in person, however you can initiate a virtual gathering where you toast 2020-21 with stories. Stories of what you've learned. Stories of what you're grateful for. Stories of who has made a difference for you. Stories of what brought you joy.

Sharing these stories with friends and family will create a rising tide raising all involved connected community that can counteract the isolation/loneliness some people have been feeling. You are turning your life - and helping people turn their life - into a work of art.

Someone's got to go first. Someone's got to suggest this, plan this, host this. Why not you?

Who will you invite? Write down their names right now. Will you have 4 people? 14 people? Family only? Friends from around the country? Will you use your Zoom link or borrow someone else's? Email the invitation right now. You're even to share part of this post so people have context. Be sure to record the call so you can share it with everyone and they can listen to it whenever they want to re-connect with who and what is right in their world.

Brian Tracy said, "Never say anything to yourself you don't want to come true."

See this virtual gathering as a verbal vision board. If you've done them before, you know it's uncanny how many things you put on your board beat the odds and come true in real life.

This Review-Preview is an opportunity for you and the people you care about to tell stories of what you want to remember about 2020, and what you want to come true in 2021.

You might want to share a few prompt questions to kick-start the story-telling. Feel free to adapt these as you see fit, cherry-pick a few favorites, or create your own. These questions can facilitate a meaningful conversation that imprints the memories we want to carry forward - and creates a future that is more of what we want it to be.

Stories to Share, Imprint, and Remember about This Year

1. What is a favorite place I discovered, explored or spent time in? Why was it meaningful?

2. Who is someone who really showed up for me, who positively impacted me? How so?

3. How did I change - for good? What new beliefs, rituals, or behaviors did I adopt?

4. What’s a meaningful achievement or skill I acquired that I’m proud of?

5. What did I discover about myself that pleasantly surprised me?

6. What is the best book I read or movie/TV program I saw? Why?

7. How did I contribute or make a difference for someone this year?

8. When I think back on this year, what am I most grateful for? Why?

Please note: The stories about the new year are not meant to be traditional ""scolding" resolutions about what we should do, e.g., we should lose weight, exercise more, stop working so much hours, spending so much time on social media. These are stories about what would light us up, what would we enjoy that would make life more meaningful.

Stories to Plant, Plan and Look Forward to About Next Year

1. A person I would like to meet or get to know better is ___ I will reach out to them by ___

2. I would love to get re-involved in this hobby, art project or learn this skill __ because ___

3. I've always wanted to go here ____ or do this ___ and I'm going to do it _____

4. Something that will add joy and meaning to my life and contribute to my well-bring is __.

5. I will make time for ___ because I know, when I look back, I'll always be glad I did.

Queen Elizabeth said, "Good memories are our second chance at happiness."

What stories and memories do you want to imprint and carry forward from 2020?

What stories and memories do want to come true in 2021?

Be sure to tell stories you want to remember and stories you want to live.

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Sam Horn, CEO of the Intrigue Agency and the Tongue Fu! Training Institute has the best of all worlds. She speaks for National Geographic, Intel, Boeing and Capital One; writes about topics that intrigue her; and helps clients create one-of-a-kind businesses, brands and stories.

Want to experience Sam's Community Review-Preview on Dec. 30th? Email us at Cheri@IntrigueAgency.com to register and receive instructions on how to join us on Zoom.