When Winners are Losers and Vice Versa

Winning sometimes create the worst losers while some of the best winners come from what used to be losers. Why you may ask?

1. Winning is like a drug. IT's ADDICTIVE. Once you taste the sweetness and glory that comes with victory, wouldn't you want to keep having that with you as long as possible? That being said, we have all heard of horror stories of some "winners" who resorted to unethical means to continue wining. Ben Johnson who was once regarded as the world's fastest man comes to mind. He was undeniably one of the world's best but he just couldn't resist cheating just to get that elusive win. If you think about it, we have seen this happen many times.. bending and breaking some rules all because of the need to win.

2. Winning does not test your resolve and character as well as losing does. We have all been winners and we all know that feeling. The extra effort is enjoyable, the pressure is fun - all because we feel we are in our element. We are bred for this! Apologies but I will reveal my age a little bit - we are like Apollo Creed. When he lost to Rocky, he didn't pivot and look for ways to improve himself. What did he do? He was so sold on his capabilities that he accepted a match with the mountain of a man Ivan Drago and well.. we know how that ended. How many times have we seen "winners" come in barking orders about what to do because "that is how we did things in the past"? How many of them are more intent on replicating what was done in the past and seem disinterested at understanding the present landscape? Pretty much like Apollo Creed intent on reliving lost glory. Oblivious to pretty much all goings-on around them.

3. Winning does not inspire thorough debrief. What comes after a win? CELEBRATION. Sometimes nothing else after that. Very few people have a habit of studying their wins to understand what led to the positive results. Case in point, what do you remember more... the factors that led to a win or the ones that led to a loss? I rest my case.

4. Winners are not exposed to as much stress and pressure as losers. Most of them will say they are "in their element" and actually welcome the situations they are in. Now because we said in #3 that winning does not inspire thorough debrief, winners sometimes go on autopilot not wanting to change anything since "nothing is broken". This is why when a winner is suddenly faced with failure, he/she is sometimes left perplexed. I have observed that the ones impacted the most are the ones who have never failed as they are left not knowing where to go and what to do.

NOW ON THE FLIPSIDE...

5. If winning is ADDICTIVE, losing teaches HUMILITY and GRATEFULNESS. I am proud to say that I grew up bussing tables in fastfood restaurants, drank cheap alcohol and relied on mass transport to get from Point A to Point B. To this day, I am thankful for what I have achieved and in part acknowledge my present demeanor to all the challenges I had to go through working up the ranks. For some weird reason, since looking back I never imagined I will get to where I am now, I am reminded of that scene from the movie Babe wherein the farmer exclaims.. "that'll do pig, that'll do". For me that was quietly celebrating success and sheepishly enough, is something I always envision after a successful endeavor.

6. Now who is the most successful loser for me? EASY - ROCKY BALBOA! Again people from my generation will understand. For the kids, watch and celebrate Rocky's life and journey. He represents every blue collar worker who eventually managed to get his shot and made good of it. Up to this day, I still get my Rocky fix every now and then.

7. Now if winning means celebration, losing starts with 2 things most of the time. You either sulk in defeat or try to analyze what went wrong. When you sulk in defeat, that's it. You either walk away or continue sulking. Either way, there is no winning with either response. Now when you choose to analyze what went wrong, you are again faced with 2 choices.. this involves pointing the finger. Outside (other factors beside yourself) or Inward (contributing factors you have added to the loss). The more you point outside, the more frustrated you get as things look out of control. What do you do? Look inward and analyze what you had influence over and you will always be pleasantly surprised. There is always more influence you had that you always thought. It's just a matter of perspective.

8. Now why must there be a winner in the first place? WHY DOES THERE ALWAYS HAVE TO BE JUST ONE WINNER??? Let me end by sharing one universal truth with you. There are only 24 hours in a day. Regardless who you are.. you may be the richest, the poorest, the luckiest, the unluckiest, etc - you still get 24 hours. Nothing more, nothing less. What is my definition of winning? Use the 24 hours you have today as if it were your last. Don't waste any minute and if you get that down as a habit - then now you are truly winning!