Why Do We Need To Change?

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"You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons or the wind, but you can change yourself. That is something you have charge of." – Jim Rohn

Change is rarely something we are indifferent to.  Whether it affects us positively or negatively, it always gets our juices flowing. 

Unfortunately, as the need for change approaches we often get scared. 

Change is a step into the unknown, and as we face that step we are often wracked with worry. 

Practically we worry about how much a change is going to cost us; what we will have to let go of in order to make room for the new.  Then, more philosophically, we worry about how a change is going to affect our underlying beliefs and ideologies, or the impact it will have on our family, our job, our life direction.

Faced with those worries, we often resist change, we deny it, and try and hold on to the status quo until we absolutely have to let go.  We are forced to change as the status quo disintegrates below us, which makes the changes that we have to make all the more stressful and cataclysmic.

But change does not have to be a dirty word.  I like to say that if we aren’t growing, then we’re dying…and the essence of growth is change.

 The Nature of Change

Change is abundantly clear in the world around us today.  You can’t watch the news or read a news feed without coming face to face with chaos and confusion... and the need to make sense of it. Many of the challenges in the world are complicated and won’t be solved easily.

But what about the challenges in your own life?  Where do you avoid dealing with them? Where do you place the blame on circumstances or other people? How much are you willing to tolerate before you finally know that you have to change what isn’t working for you.

We are all guilty of this, including me. I put off today what should have been dealt with yesterday and make excuses for why I’m not taking action. As you read this, I’m sure you can think of something in your life that fits the bill.

As organic beings we are always in a process of change.  The process is so constant that we don’t even notice it.

Life has a pattern, and it is often cyclical.  Opportunities arise for changes that lead to transformations, but frequently we are not yet ready to seize those opportunities, or we ignore them because it is inconvenient, or we are afraid to take the next step.   

Within the cycles of life we have the ultimate freedom and power of choice. 

To deny that power, the ability to choose, is to deny your own existence.

Many clients say they are afraid of losing their jobs, or their houses, or the money in the bank. But at this moment in time there is no evidence that this will come true. It’s simply a story that could be true if no actions are taken or different choices are made.

My best advice when I hear this is to ask the client to be in the moment. The phrase ‘for today’ is a great way to think about life when you get overwhelmed.

For today, I have a job.

For today, I have a home.

For today, I have money in the bank.

For today, I am healthy.

When you can approach life from the point of view “for today,” you are ahead of the game because you will find creative ways to keep yourself in the moment.

Don’t give in to the ‘yes, but….’ scenario.  I like to say there is only one ‘but’ in your life that matters, and you are probably sitting on it as you read this!

Ideas On How To Manage Change

Here are a few ideas to get you comfortable with change:

1. Do some re-evaluation of your life by creating a constructive plan to move you forward.  This will do two things.  It will get your mind focused on what you need, and it will start you thinking on ways to implement it.   You are creatively problem solving as you figure out what it will take to get you from where you are now, to where you want to go.
2. Set clear goals but not just any goals.  Be specific about what it is you want to achieve.  If it’s a new job, what will it take for you to get one.  Go through all the steps necessary to get to the final result.  Resumes, interviews, skills, education, whatever you need, put it down on paper and figure out what is the next step.
3. Set deadlines for yourself.  Without deadlines, a goal is just a wish.  Go beyond the wishing stage.  But set deadlines that are in the near future and in the distance.  It gives you something to strive for.

The wonderful thing about our mind is:  it too can change.  We have the control. Change your thinking, and you will change your life.

The Change Equation

D(issatisfaction) x V(ision) x P(lan) = C(onscious Change)

Dissatisfaction:  We don’t need to have our back against the wall but you do have to admit that change is necessary if you are to find contentment in life.

Vision: A clear vision of what you want to attain as you change is essential. Imagine what your life could look like a year from now if you took the steps to change what’s not working.

Plan: A vision without action is simply wishful thinking so consider carefully what you need to do. Who do you need to support you. What resources do you need to make the change.

Conscious Change: Change like the seasons is the one constant in life. The willingness to change is critical to your success. Own the process and by doing so you can overcome the fear, the uncertainty, and start to consciously choose the life you want to live.

“Nothing is permanent except change.”  -  Herakleitos

Within that cycle of life, we have the ultimate freedom and power: the power to change. 

We can choose to grow, to make mistakes and then to choose again, and move on. We can choose to be different than we are today, and we can choose how we want to live.

To deny that power, the ability to choose and change, is to deny your own existence.

All experiences in life are shared by other human beings. We all go through joy, pain, good fortune, loss, loneliness, togetherness, light and darkness, and we all have certain needs and drives in common that when we are dissatisfied can challenge us to do life differently.

The timing and distinctive expression of this constantly changing growth pattern is unique to you, and the experience that is your life.

Consider this: By ignoring your own needs and your own desires, you essentially ignore the abundance that awaits you when you make different choices.

By holding onto old, outdated modes of thinking, of being, of believing, we essentially refuse the extraordinary wealth of who we are, and the gift of self-knowledge that changes everything.

By being aware of the essential nature of change, of allowing this change to be the constant in our life without fighting it, we grow fully into the potential of who we were meant to be.

Start today. No more excuses.

Jacqueline Wales is the author of three books including The Fearless Factor and The Fearless Factor at Work available on Amazon. She is a TEDx speaker: Unleash the Power of Fear and the founder of several online programs including Transformational Strategies for Success; From Chaos to Clarity; and Leading with Trust.

These programs take a wholistic approach to personal development designed to help individuals rapidly make changes in the fastest time possible and increase their effectiveness at work and at home. The benefit of implementing TSS in your company will help develop strong leaders and increase performance, productivity, and profitability across all dimensions of the organization.

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