Why Getting Triggered Might Be the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You...

Have you ever found yourself reacting badly to something someone said or did?

It might leave you feeling upset, frustrated, or angry, but have you ever stopped to ask, why?

A few years ago, I had one of these moments. A friend mocked my work, and I felt hurt and unsupported.

It drained me, leaving me feeling not good enough.

My initial reaction was anger towards him, but as I reflected on it, I realised something important: this wasn’t about his words. It was about me.

𝙏𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙚𝙭𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙖 𝙢𝙞𝙧𝙧𝙤𝙧, 𝙧𝙚𝙛𝙡𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙄 𝙣𝙚𝙚𝙙𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙠 𝙤𝙣.

It revealed a lack of confidence in myself. My self-esteem was low, and I was relying on external validation to feel better.

When I didn’t get it, I reacted badly.

What I thought was a negative experience turned out to be an incredible opportunity.

Instead of blaming him or doubling down on my feelings of victimisation and anger, I used that trigger to go within.

𝗜 𝗮𝘀𝗸𝗲𝗱 𝗺𝘆𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳:

What am I telling myself about this situation?

Why does it upset me off so much?

What belief is creating these feelings?

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝘀𝘄𝗲𝗿 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗰𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗿: I still had a lot of internal guilt and self-blame that I hadn’t worked through.

Inside I didn't feel good enough.

Until I dealt with that, I’d keep seeking validation externally.

That one experience —seemingly small— sparked a deep, transformational journey.

I began finding internal validation, letting go of old guilt, and learning to like myself again.

Now, I’m grateful for that moment because it set me free from a belief that was holding me back.

𝗔𝗿𝗲 𝗧𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗴𝗲𝗿𝘀 𝗥𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗮 𝗕𝗮𝗱 𝗧𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴?

In today’s world, we often tiptoe around trigger warnings to avoid upsetting others.

While being considerate is important, protecting people from discomfort doesn’t always help them in the long term.

In fact, our triggers are often signals, pointing us towards a belief or fear that no longer serves us.

𝙏𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙠 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙡𝙖𝙨𝙩 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙜𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪.

Maybe it was a comment, a situation, or even something small like a tone of voice.

What story did you tell yourself in that moment?

Often, these reactions are tied to unconscious beliefs that shape how we think and feel.

If you’re triggered regularly, it’s not a sign something is wrong, it’s an invitation to look deeper.

What if, instead of avoiding your triggers, you saw them as opportunities to grow?

𝙃𝙤𝙬 𝙩𝙤 𝙄𝙙𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙛𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙒𝙤𝙧𝙠 𝙏𝙝𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝 𝙖 𝙏𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙜𝙚𝙧

𝗡𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹 𝘁𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗴𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗱:

𝙋𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨.Where do you feel tension or discomfort in your body?

𝘼𝙨𝙠 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛, “What am I telling myself about this situation?” Identify the story you’re creating in your mind.

𝙁𝙞𝙣𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙡𝙞𝙚𝙛 𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙣𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙝. What fear, assumption, or judgment is fuelling your reaction?

𝙍𝙚𝙛𝙧𝙖𝙢𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙧𝙚𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚. Challenge the belief: Is it true? What would change if you saw things differently?

For example, if you’re triggered by criticism, it might reveal a fear of failure or not being good enough.

By addressing that core belief, you can release the power it holds over you.

𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗧𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗴𝗲𝗿𝘀 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗼 𝗧𝗿𝗮𝗻𝘀𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻

These days, I welcome my triggers.

They aren’t problems to avoid, they’re opportunities to uncover and shift beliefs holding me back.

Every time I work through a trigger, I grow stronger, freer, and more at peace with myself.

𝙎𝙤, 𝙄’𝙡𝙡 𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨:

What triggers you the most?

What belief could be hiding under the surface?

And what would change if you embraced that trigger as a chance to grow?

𝗜𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂’𝗿𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝘆 𝘁𝗼 𝗴𝗿𝗼𝘄 - 𝗩𝗶𝘀𝗶𝘁 𝗠𝘆 𝗪𝗲𝗯𝘀𝗶𝘁𝗲

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