Why I Stopped Showing Up Just Anywhere

"Once You Realize the Power of Your Presence, You Won’t Be Just Anywhere"

There comes a moment in everyone’s life when they realize that they are no longer just a person with a body and a calendar. No, my friend, you are a force. A presence. A walking, talking Wi-Fi router of vibes. And once you unlock this inner wisdom, let me tell you, showing up becomes a whole different game.

Take me, for example. I used to show up everywhere. Birthday parties of second cousins. Office meetings that could’ve been emails. Potluck dinners where I was the only one who remembered to bring a pot and some luck. I’d even RSVP to events I didn’t understand, like “Paint Your Inner Child Night.” Spoiler alert: my inner child is apparently really bad at painting.

But then, one day, it hit me: my presence is expensive. Not in a snobby way, like, “I charge $500 an hour to breathe in your general direction,” but in the sense that where I go, I carry a certain energy. My presence is like seasoning; too much in the wrong dish, and you’ve got chaos. Too little, and it's bland. The trick is knowing where to sprinkle yourself for maximum flavor.

For instance, I stopped going to events out of guilt. You know the ones where you think, “If I don’t go, people will think I’m antisocial,” but then you show up and everyone there looks like they’re playing a game of Who Can Regret Coming Here First. Why waste your presence in a room where the only highlight is stale cupcakes and polite nodding?

And let’s talk about work meetings. Oh, the meetings. Once I realized the power of my presence, I started skipping the ones that didn’t need me. “Oh, we’re discussing the font size on the quarterly report? Sorry, I’m busy empowering my aura elsewhere.” Suddenly, people only invited me when it mattered. Apparently, absence can also scream, “I’m important.”

Even social media had to feel the shift. I stopped replying to random group chats where people send memes from 2012 and act like they discovered fire. Instead, I became that person who only drops in with a perfectly timed gif or a one-liner that makes everyone question their own humor skills. My presence? Effortlessly felt, rarely overdone.

Now, don’t get me wrong—I still show up. But I do it with purpose. When I walk into a room, I like to imagine Beyoncé’s wind machine is behind me, blowing my hair just enough to make people think, Who is this person, and why do I feel the sudden urge to reevaluate my life?

But here's the kicker: realizing the power of your presence doesn’t mean you’re too good for every space. It means you value yourself enough to choose the right ones. The ones where your energy sparks conversations, lights up ideas, or at least guarantees someone else doesn’t have to eat the guacamole alone.

So now, every time I consider showing up somewhere, I ask myself, Does this room deserve me? And if the answer is yes, I step in like the main character of a movie only I’m watching. Because once you know your worth, you stop showing up to be just another face in the crowd. You show up to be the vibe, the spark, the seasoning that makes the whole dish memorable.

If you see me walking into a room now, trust me: I thought long and hard before deciding to be there. And you should, too. Because once you realize the power of your presence, you won’t be just anywhere—you’ll be everywhere you’re meant to be. With a sprinkle of fabulous, of course.