Why Is Work-Life Balance SO Unattainable?

🔥The burning career question of the week:

The Internet is filled with tips and tricks on how I am supposed to be a superstar at work and on-point in every aspect of my personal life. But if work-life balance is so simple, why is it sooooo unattainable?

Great question! Well …

👎 Work-life balance is so unattainable because it doesn’t exist—It is a myth.

Our personal lives and our work lives overlap. Our personal engagement impacts our professional pursuits and vice versa.

The term “balance” implies our work and personal lives are equally weighted in importance, and “achieving work-life balance” suggests we can create and maintain a perfect equilibrium between the two.

This is simply not possible.

Our roles and priorities constantly change, so even if we achieve “balance,” it can quickly disappear. Caring for a sick loved one vs. finishing a critical work assignment are both important in different ways; however, one might take precedence over the other depending on time and circumstance.

Attempting to achieve work-life balance sets us up for failure, leaving little room for blurred lines between commitments and changes in priorities.

So, what is the solution?

🌟 It about work-life BLEND...

...building a BLEND that supports your well-being, enhances professional performance, and builds meaningful connections across all sectors of your life is key.

Here are a few tips on how to create work-life BLEND.

➡ Get crystal clear on your priorities. Envision your life goals and be honest with yourself on whether your priorities and your life goals align.

• Identify the roles in your life (friend, caregiver, partner, manager) and significance within each role (e.g., define what being a “friend” means to you).
• Rank your priorities based on these roles and role significance. Remain open to the possibility that priorities will shift as life circumstances change.

💡Pro Tip: Revisit this priority exercise regularly. It will help you become more agile to the fluctuations in roles and role responsibilities.

➡ Understand how your energy is fueled and depleted. Complete your most challenging priorities during periods of peak energy.

• We have 24 hours in a day. How does your energy flow? Do you have a full tank in the morning? Feel depleted mid-day? Do certain priorities drain your energy more than others? Get clear on your energy patterns.
• Focus on your key priorities when your energy is at its peak.

💡Pro Tip: Many people exercise first thing in the morning because this is often when energy levels are at their highest. However, the morning may also be when you have peak mental performance. On days when you have mentally challenging priorities, consider rearranging your exercise schedule to tap into your peak mental performance.

➡ Set boundaries. Since you have already gotten clear on your top priorities (at the moment), and how these priorities impact your energy throughout the day, use your priorities to shape your boundaries.

• Assign fixed and flexible labels to these boundaries. Fixed boundaries are not within our control to alter (e.g., standing weekly work meetings or monthly doctor’s appointments). Flexible boundaries have scheduling leeway. For example, you might set a boundary to exercise 3x a week but when you exercise can vary as your fixed boundaries allow.
• Just Say No! Saying no is as important as saying yes. Ask yourself: “Where am I saying yes to things that distract or misalign with my priorities?” Decline events or activities that derail your fixed or flexible boundaries.

💡Pro Tip: Flexible does not mean ignored or avoided. Setting boundaries takes time and fortitude, but ultimately, you’re accountable for yourself!

➡ Make choices. Reflect on how you feel at the end of each day. Do the activities you devote your time to align with your priorities and resonate with your authentic self? Before taking on new responsibilities, ask yourself:

• Is this activity important? Does it fit with my work-life BLEND?
• Is this new role or responsibility important to me? Is it meaningful?  
• Is it ME who needs to take on this responsibility? Can I delegate?

💡Pro Tip: Since your roles, responsibilities, and boundaries continue to shift, ensure you are openly and regularly communicating with your support system.

➡ Find your community. Cultivate relationships with people who inspire you. Hanging around with people who offer emotional support and diverse perspectives reinforces your mental and physical energies.

• Map out your support circle.
• Define roles and responsibilities for each person in your support circle.
• Identify gaps and cultivate a strategy to fill those gaps.

💡Pro Tip: Implement a strategy to continuously nurture your support circle and build this strategy into your flexible priorities.

➡ Create habits. Use available tools and resources to find your flow.

• Focus on singular tasks at one time. Minimizing distractions like phone, email, or co-worker interruptions helps.
• Use time to your benefit. Find and employ the time management strategy (FocusKeeper; RescueTime, etc.) that works for you.
• Use space to motivate you. Keep your workspace clean and clutter-free. Use focus apps like Freedom and Brain.fm.

💡Pro Tip: Purposely reflect on and revise your work-life BLEND.

Reframing your mindset from work-life balance to work-life BLEND will not happen overnight. But it WILL happen! Stop trying to attain the unattainable.

👉 Instead, ask yourself …

How can I ditch the “balance” myth and create a more favorable work-life BLEND?

If you’re ready to work together to improve your work-life BLEND, book a DISCOVERY CALL!

Until next Friday, thanks for reading!

Heather

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About Heather:

Heather is an award-winning career coach + consultant who works with mid- to senior-level individuals in career transition. She also coaches other career consultants on best practices in the career field. She is an expert in career theory and transition and experienced in helping clients achieve their professional and personal best. To learn more, visit careerinprogress.com.