Working with me is a little weird

I have come to the realization that working with me is a little weird. I didn't notice at first. The reality is, I've never worked with me so how was I supposed to know it was weird. No one ever mentions that it's weird, but it's what they're thinking.

Over time you start to notice people's reactions, you know? That awkward chuckle when they don't know what to say, or the slow response like this is an interaction they weren't expecting to have. But, what made me really realize that it was weird was when I interacted with another of my kind. Now, I'll bet if you know me in any way you think I'm going to launch into a discussion about engineers at this point. But that's not who I'm talking about. Not exactly, any way.

The first time I realized it was weird was in a job interview. I asked the interviewee a question about how a certain technology works. He replied, "I have no idea how that works, I've never used it. How do you use it, and what do you like about it? Have any good tips?" I was taken aback. No one had ever candidly admitted that they didn't know, and then ask me to describe it for them!

This was someone willing to ask a question even if it made them look stupid.

That's when I knew I met another of my weird kind! Someone who was willing to ask a question at an unusual time. At an awkward moment. When everyone else in the room was silent. This was someone willing to ask a question even if it made them look stupid. I met someone willing to hang up his pride and turn an obstacle into an opportunity.

You know what happened in that interview? He did learn something new. Something that he didn't know before he showed up to be interviewed and something maybe he would need in his next interview or tomorrow at work. Seems worth me being surprised, certainly for him. He didn't know something and he was willing to ask. Ask yourself, "How often do I wonder something and I don't ask because I think I should already know it... or because it would be weird?"

A friend of mine was getting his PhD a few years ago and part of that process involved studying dialog. I was part of a focus group where we would "dialog about dialog". Yes, we talked about talking. It might sound a bit weird, but it was actually quite interesting. One day the topic came up of information exchange. If Mike has nearly all the world's knowledge and Joe only knows a few simple truths, why would Mike ever talk to Joe?

Someone suggested that Mike wouldn't bother to talk to Joe because Mike wouldn't get equal benefit out of it. The problem with that view is that it ignores the fact that Mike just wants to get better, to learn and to improve himself. If Joe learns gigaquads of information (that's not a real thing, I just made that up, or stole it from StarTrek, possibly) and Mike learns one little nugget, they're both better for the experience. Joe didn't win some cosmic battle for information exchange that Mike lost.

Sometimes we get caught treating life like it is a giant race to the title of information super lord. Funny thing is, life isn't like that at all. I'm better when you're better. And, if you can glean a little nugget of knowledge or wisdom from me, you're better for it -- even if I left the conversation learning far more from you.

So, if you work with me, I might ask a question even when you expect me to know the answer. Even if it's weird. Actually, why not ask a question the next time you have something to learn? Maybe it's out of context. Maybe it's a strange place to ask a question. Maybe people will think you're weird too. Or maybe, just maybe, you'll learn something important and those around you will actually respect you more because you were willing to ask the (not-so) foolish question.