You don’t see reality as it is, but as you are – biases in action
The Lens of Subjectivity: How Our Beliefs, Values, Identity and Biases Shape Our Perception of Others
In business, we often pride ourselves on objectivity and clear-sighted decision-making. Yet, beneath the surface, our beliefs, values, identity structures, and cognitive biases quietly shape the way we see and interpret everything around us—especially the behaviours of other people. The famous saying, "We don’t see reality as it is, but as we are," points to this truth. We don’t interact with objective reality directly; instead, we experience a filtered version, coloured by our personal perspectives. For business leaders and entrepreneurs, understanding how this works and how it can affect decision-making is crucial. Let's explore how this dynamic impacts the workplace and why it’s worth uncovering our unconscious patterns.
Beliefs and Values: The Lens That Colours Our Perception
Our beliefs and values shape the way we interpret and react to the actions of others. Imagine a scenario where a manager sees an employee taking extra breaks throughout the day. If that manager holds a strong belief in "work hard, no excuses," they might interpret this behaviour as laziness or lack of commitment. Another manager who values work-life balance and self-care may see the same behaviour and interpret it as a necessary recharge for optimal performance.
Our beliefs and values act as interpretive lenses. Rather than seeing the objective reality—an employee taking a break—we jump to conclusions shaped by our internal meaning-making. This process is mostly unconscious; we often aren’t aware that we’re interpreting behaviours through the filter of our beliefs and/or values.
Identity Structures: How Our Self-Image Influences Our Interpretations
Our identity—the story we tell ourselves about who we are—also plays a significant role. A business owner who identifies as a "self-made entrepreneur" may look down on employees who rely heavily on team collaboration or ask for guidance, viewing them as lacking independence. In contrast, an executive who values teamwork might see these same behaviours as signs of healthy interdependence and a desire to learn.
Our identity shapes what we consider "right" or "appropriate" behaviour and creates a kind of hierarchy of values that, again, colours our interpretation of others. When we view situations through our identity, we might fail to see the full picture and misinterpret others’ intentions or capabilities.
Cognitive Biases: The Trap of Mindreading and Projection
In the rush and complexity of business, we often make quick assessments about others’ actions and intentions. Cognitive biases like the fundamental attribution error—the tendency to attribute others’ behaviours to their character rather than situational factors—can lead us to snap judgements. For instance, if a team member misses a deadline, we might assume they’re disorganised or unmotivated, rather than considering other factors like an overwhelming workload or personal issues outside of work.
Recommended by LinkedIn
Another common bias in the workplace is projection, where we unconsciously project our feelings or motivations onto others. If we’re feeling insecure about our abilities, we might interpret a co-worker’s constructive feedback as criticism or even hostility. This process, often called "mindreading," can lead us to assume we know others’ intentions without actual evidence (like checking in), leading to unnecessary conflicts and misunderstandings.
Real-Life Impact in Business
Consider Mark (not his real name), a Coaching Room client and CEO of a growing tech startup. He prides himself on his ability to see through to the truth and make rational decisions, yet he often finds himself frustrated with his team, whom he views as not fully committed. In a recent meeting, he noticed one of his senior developers looking disengaged and immediately interpreted it as disinterest in the project. But in reality, the developer was simply anxious about a personal matter and struggling to concentrate.
Mark’s belief in "total commitment" and identity as a "no-nonsense leader" clouded his perspective, leading him to jump to conclusions. This interpretation drove him to confront the developer harshly, damaging their rapport and lowering morale. Had he recognised his filters at play, at the time, he might have approached the situation differently, perhaps even building trust by showing empathy.
Stepping Beyond Your Perspective with NLP
The Coaching Room’s NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) offers a framework to help business leaders and professionals become aware of these filters. #NLP can help individuals uncover the unconscious beliefs, values, and identity structures that shape their interpretations. By becoming aware of these patterns, business leaders can stop projecting their biases onto others and start seeing situations more clearly and objectively.
Through NLP coaching, leaders like Mark has learned to pause, question his immediate reactions, and either check in, or consider alternative perspectives. NLP provides tools for identifying and challenging cognitive biases, so business leaders can move away from mindreading and projection and toward a more collaborative, open, and understanding leadership style.
Call to Action: Experience the Power of NLP with The Coaching Room
If you're a business leader or professional who wants to move beyond these unconscious patterns and see reality with clarity, consider engaging with The Coaching Room’s NLP programmes. Our coaching sessions empower you to step outside of your habitual perspective, recognise and manage your cognitive biases, and lead with greater awareness and empathy.
Empowering Professionals to Build Stronger Relationships & Overcome Workplace Anxiety | Elevating Confidence, Communication, and Collaboration
1moGreat share Jay - thank you.
Company Director | Venture Builder | Board Director -Executive/ Non-Executive | Advisory Board Member | Coach & Mentor
1moYep. We can’t see or read the label from inside the jar. In fact, we don’t know we are in a jar. And yet we think our experience is The Experience, of reality- no jar.