Are You Unfulfilled?

I remember the feelings like the event happened yesterday. Years ago, I served as an organization's divisional finance leader and first experienced being unfulfilled. At that time, I didn’t even know how to refer to the feelings I was experiencing, let alone summarize them into a label of being unfulfilled. I just knew that things at work kept getting more and more jumbled, I felt like I was riding an emotional roller coaster, and no matter how hard I worked, I couldn’t seem to get ahead of the game.   

In addition, my boss, the CEO, who when we started working together seemed like we jelled like magnets coming together, now seemed like oil and water. We were definitely not aligned in how we saw the business, both operationally and strategically. Lastly, I started to get physical ailments, with the most noticeable symptoms being raspberry-colored blotches breaking out on my arms. I felt overwhelmed, discouraged, drained, and just ready to quit. 

Wow, just typing that out brought back some chills! Ugh! 

Perhaps you’re finding yourself in that same situation. Maybe not all the symptoms…it might be that you’re just feeling that something isn’t quite right. You can’t put your finger on it, but you get the feeling that there’s got to be more to work than just putting in the time and getting a paycheck. And while we’re told in Genesis 3:17b – 19a: 

 “Cursed is the ground because of you (Adam); through painful toil, you will eat food from it all the days of your life. It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your brow, you will eat your food until you return to the ground,”   

we’re also told in Colossians 3:23-24: 

 “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.” 

Symptoms of Being Unfulfilled

So…how do we discern between what I will call the “normal” burden and toil of work and the point where we are in the wrong spot and should be doing something else for God’s glory?   

First, let’s specify a few of the symptoms, that, when put together, become a diagnosis of being unfulfilled: 

1. Lack of Interest – Going to work becomes more and more of a drag. Commonly referred to as the “Monday Blues,” you experience a total disconnect from work and the workplace on a frequent, recurring basis. 

1. Lack of Growth – As you do a self-assessment, you realize you’ve become stagnant in developing your skills and/or expanding your responsibilities. You don’t see any road ahead to change that course. 

1. Misaligned Values – You’ve noticed decisions being made by management, or even your supervisor, that don’t align with your view of right and wrong. You may not quite be able to articulate this very well, but you feel uncomfortable or even disturbed by these decisions. 

1. Mentally Burdened – Whenever you think about work, including when you’re physically there, you just don’t seem to have any energy. When you leave work, you feel mentally drained and incapable of doing much at home. A lack of patience usually accompanies this symptom. 

1. Physical Reactions – Perhaps similar to my situation, you actually get so much stress from your work that you are physically affected. Maybe it’s a rash, tightness in your jaw, headaches, etc. If those become recurring issues, you’ve got to pay attention to this. 

1. Performance Suffers – Given what I’ve just outlined, you shouldn’t be surprised if your productivity and performance take a downturn. Yet often people somehow miss the correlation of what they’ve been feeling to their supervisor’s assessment. Take note. 

1. Motivations change – When some or all of the above occur, it’s very easy to see your motivation slip from pleasing God with your work to “just get by” or “cut some corners” to get through the day. Understanding why we do what we do is a foundational element to being fulfilled. 

How to Navigate a Path Forward

Now, given these symptoms, I’m not suggesting you immediately quit your job, although in some cases that step might be necessary. But in the meantime, if you can weather through those symptoms without doing yourself too much harm, here are some steps that might help to alleviate some symptoms while you figure out what the right job is for you. 

1. Reflection – Self-awareness is the key to beginning to change, and giving yourself permission and time to think through who you are and why you’re on this earth may sound a bit esoteric and philosophical, but odds are high you haven’t done this for a while. Capture your thoughts through journaling and perhaps check out our Hear God Calling You workbook HERE.  

1. Comparison – As Teddy Roosevelt once said, “Comparison is the thief of joy,” and you may have fallen victim to this trap. Rather than looking at others and their progress, self-assess your capabilities and opportunities to try to get as rational a view as possible. 

1. Boundaries – Odds are high that you acquiesce to everything you’re asked to do at work without consideration of your personal life. Those potential infringements add up and contribute to the symptoms above. Be accountable for changes you can make to get different results. For example, don’t answer work calls after 6:00pm, or don’t check email on the weekends. Situations vary as to what is reasonable and what isn’t, so you may need to talk to your peers or get some outside opinions to help you sift through it. 

1. Balance – Closely related to #3, this step is literally making sure you have something to do in your life besides work. Boundaries help you monitor that, but if all you do is work, eat, sleep and then repeat, you need to insert some other activities into your life to achieve some balance. 

1. Expectations – In my own experience and through coaching others, I’ve found that misaligned expectations are the root cause of many negative symptoms. Getting crystal clear with your supervisor may feel a bit awkward, but the payoffs are HUGE. I had a direct report who used to close our weekly 1:1 meeting with “Ok, we’ve discussed quite a bit, what are the three things I need to make sure I’m focused on?” Wow! That forced me to think through and be very clear about what I needed. 

1. Equip Yourself – Particularly if you’re not experiencing growth opportunities, take the initiative and explore developmental experiences within and outside your employer. Seek out a mentor relationship for some outside insights to aid your progress. Volunteer for some work projects outside your function to add to your learning and exposure within your employer. 

1. Network – But of course! A Crossroads Career blog can’t be fully complete without this recommendation. :)) Seriously though, this step gets you to look outside your current job and learn what else is out there. What I believe you’ll find is that many work opportunities outside your current one could be meaningful and fulfilling.   

Being unfulfilled in your work can be miserable. Discovering purpose and meaning in your work to be fulfilled results in contentment and peace. I encourage you to recognize the symptoms and take action to get better results! It’s absolutely worth it!

Blessings! 

Dave

Dave Sparkman currently serves as the volunteer Crossroads Career board chair and local ministry leader. He is also the founder and managing director of Spark Your Culture, a corporate culture consulting firm. Prior to that he worked at UnitedHealth Group, a Fortune #5 public company, serving in the role of Chief Culture Officer. His unemployment experience came from the implosion of Arthur Andersen, where he served as the West Region Managing Partner, People.

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