You are not Your Thoughts

I found myself last week in a diplomatic negotiation with invasive thoughts that plopped down in my reality like an uninvited wet dog. We might ask, do we have a choice? The answer is always “Yes!”

Instead of shaming, using force or getting upset at their reoccurring and unwelcome entrance, I employed an unexpected strategy.

I spoke to the the thoughts with power and told them they were no longer welcome. And it worked. I defeated the monster this time.

We are taught (unfortunately) by somewhat unenlightened philosophers in school such as Descartes “Je pense donc je suis” — I think therefore I am. But we are not our thoughts.

Thoughts are a collection of impositions, experiences, limiting beliefs, traumatic experiences and otherwise invasive mindsets that condition the way we see life. And above that, I am a spirit first and foremost. The mind is just a construct that is popular in modern times. But then again, so is mental illness. Could there be a correlation?

I used to identify with thoughts and emotions and even using the possessive in front of them. There is an energy behind words and when we misidentify with these concepts, we chart a specific course and direction on an ill-fated sailing journey. Simply put — we are not our thoughts. There is a 1,001 influences the average human with see possibly in an hour depending on your media consumption and social interaction. What we do not realize is that each of these interactions is a chance to either build or plunder our state of inner beauty, this resilience and joy for life.

So we are not our thoughts. We are what we watch and what we consume energetically and physically.

So what is the secret to getting rid of invasive thoughts?

1. Law of Attraction: Seeing why we call for them.

It’s probably not the most popular answer but there is a reason things emerge in our life. It is a repeated subliminal undercurrents — “not good enough”, “not worthy”, “didn’t do enough”, “could have done better” — and all that jazz. It shows up as a reminder of what we have conveniently shuffled under the carpet.

When we leave crumbs, however, we have unexpected visitors that might like the gingerbread pieces. That is where these thoughts come in. So if we want them to leave forever, we need to see how we made the gingerbread cake and then detox from whatever it is in us, that likes that toxic gift (which ironically means poison in German.)

2. Build practices of resilience and mindfulness

We need to have an arsenal of tools at our disposal when these thoughts come and attack our sacred temple. When we hold and defend our deepest beauty from these thoughts, we can see them as what they are, forces that come to compress us. (Note: this is a practice that takes time to build, as we need to first see our shadow and our denial of our deepest patterns of self-sabotage before we can get truly effective at this fencing match. They prey on our doubts.)

3. Start to watch the patterns of when they arise

This part is critical. To trap the beast, we need to know and see when it feeds and when it comes out to play. Usually all of this comes because it is deflecting something bigger we are disguising.

Banishing the thoughts and kicking the dog away does not work. I tried that for somewhere close to five years.

They just come back.

Full force. And often with more power.

These are resilient tendencies. We have to get resourceful.

How to trap the animal: start to watch the thoughts, the emotions, the feelings and tracking what came before — did someone tell us “no”? — Are we remembering a previous time of perceived rejection or our needs not being met?

Start to tune into compression in the body, tightness in the chest, stomach, face, or somewhere else and register it. Over time, a pattern emerges.

4. Be kind to yourself. Always.

Most people are not doing deep inner explorations of their misery or dissatisfaction. If we have at least identified pieces of our unfulfillment, we are most of the way there. Seriously! Why? Because most people are joyriding a pet unicorn telling them everything is fine.

Fine = the death march of the spirit.

Just say no.

How to start processing big emotions? Check out my earlier article on The Truth about Healing.

About Stephanie Hilborn

Founder | Transformational Coach | Holistic Healer | Former Diplomat

Website: www.catalyzinginspiration.com

Email: Stephanie@catalyzinginspiration.com

Follow @catalyzinginspiration on Instagram and Facebook @catalyzing inspiration.

An SF native and speaker on wellness, trauma reduction, spiritual ecology, global issues, debt relief & decolonization, Stephanie Hilborn is a former diplomat, educator and transformational life coach.

She has extensively mentored with elders from the Colombian Andes for over twelve years. With her company, Catalyzing Inspiration, she guides clients in reconnection to nature and their birthplace so that they can soothe their inner monologue and anxiety.

She is creating a course for adults to learn inspiring stories about global challenges to build a more conscious society.