‘It is time to speak up about suicide in nurses’

Is everyone at risk of suicide? Is suicide preventable? Yes.

“I can write so much on the impact of shame and the damage this stigma can have on a nurse”

People experiencing suicidal thoughts often struggle to be heard. This could be due to myths surrounding suicide, such as the idea that talking to a suicidal person can make them even more suicidal.

Another myth is that people who talk about suicide are attention seeking and difficult to manage, when in fact even though bringing up suicide can be very difficult, it suggests that the person wants and needs help.

Within healthcare, nurses are scared and bound into silence. This is due to the stigma of mental health problems and the fear of referrals to professional bodies like the Nursing and Midwifery Council (NMC).

We need discussions around mental health and suicide to be a part of everyday conversations. When we acknowledge the problem it shows strength instead of weakness and encourages nurses to talk and not wait until they get into a state of crisis to get help.

I can write so much on the impact of shame and the damage this stigma can have on a nurse.

I attempted suicide a few years ago and, as a result, I lost my job and had an NMC referral, which was later resolved.

During the NMC investigation, I could still practise as a nurse and continued to get promoted to clinical lead and matron roles but it was hard. Even now, years later, I still feel I have to constantly prove myself.

Prior to my attempt, I did talk to my manager and explained I was struggling. Looking back, I don’t think she knew how to support and manage a member of staff who was struggling for the first time with their mental health.

I felt ashamed and was worried I wouldn’t be listened to, so I felt I didn’t deserve to be a nurse anymore. I continued to come to work while I was suicidal. My uniform felt like putting on armour but I was just acting like I was fine.

At the end of the day, we are nurses and we are strong. I worked hard and took on more responsibilities when really I felt trapped in a spiral of suicidal thoughts. I felt ashamed, even though I was honest with my manager and I had no support.

Since my attempt, I have worked with organisations to adapt their policies and create a manager’s guide.

This guide covers conversation starters, supporting staff experiencing problems with their mental health, making reasonable adjustments, helping in a crisis, self-care and signposting to other resources. The guide is to be attached to my trust’s health and wellbeing policy.

In my view, communication is vital when helping colleagues. All health professionals need to provide a culture that helps and encourages people to speak up. Knowing what to say and what to do when someone is having thoughts of suicide can save lives.

My main advice to anyone feeling suicidal is to talk to someone. Don’t stay silent, as it is hard going through this alone.

“My main advice to anyone feeling suicidal is to talk to someone. Don’t stay silent”

Talk to a friend, a family member or a colleague. If you do not want to talk to someone you know then contact a helpline so you can remain anonymous. But please seek help and do not go through this alone.

Being open and honest about suicide and your mental health does not mean the end of your career. I have been promoted several times, I am currently studying for a PhD and I am an advocate for mental health in my trust.

I have won many awards, I was a finalist for Nurse of the Year with the Nursing Times in 2020.

Writing this I hope helps others to speak up, and support education in helping to stop the stigma around talking about suicide in nursing.

Is suicide uncomfortable to talk about? Yes, it is. Talking to someone and having someone listen can save a life.

The way we talk about suicide matters.

Gemma Clay, nurse and clinical doctorate fellow, University Hospitals Sussex NHS Foundation Trust