Rupinder Legha, MD

It’s important to consider broader systemic issues shaping a child’s behavior. In the moment, it can seem like the child is fully responsible for how they’re acting. But if they’re dealing with housing insecurity and not sleeping well at night or food shortages resulting in low blood sugar…being “good” can feel impossible. A student’s behavior is also influenced by their teacher’s perception of them. Whether the teacher perceives them as smart and talented or incompetent and difficult impacts how a students see themselves. For example, that school teachers are prone to anger and adultification biases that lead them to see Black youth as more angry and less innocent than they are. Checking these biases can impact students’ behavior.

Work on helping others write. My friends and colleagues find it quite helpful when I workshop with them. I’ll help them pinpoint their idea for a piece, locate an outlet for sharing it with the world so we have a word count and audience in mind, and then off we go. I usually start by letting people speak freely from the heart while taking detailed notes. My friends find that if they can think through their ideas and speak freely while I do the writing, it can feel less draining for them. It’s also nice for me because I can see how my writing skills support others.

As you developed a routine, consider the different ways in which you can write. Perhaps, if you write best in the morning, dedicate an hour to your most demanding writing, perhaps related things getting paid. Build a nurturing ritual around it, for example a hot cup of tea or coffee, your favorite candle of choice, abs your dedicated writing spot. Setting up the environment can help you set the frame for writing success. Take breaks during the day because sitting for hours to write can be demanding. Perhaps dedicate an hour of time to social media writing—working on Linked in and other social media outlets offers a wide array of opportunities. Finally introduce some play and do crosswords or spelling bee in the New York Times!

People want to see the person behind the message! Try to make online engagement fun and lively. It can feel overwhelming at times, but one can start slow and involve trusted collaborators. A professional photo shoot is a wonderful place to start in terms of putting yourself out there for the world to see.

The stories that we are often most ashamed to tell--or have been most compelled to hide--are often the very ones that we need to tell. Remember that other people are waiting to hear them. These stories are often heroic and involve some kind of personal redemption, but they of course encompass heartache and failure. Finding a community of likeminded change-makers engaged in the same kind of growth journey can help you feel more comfortable sharing your story--as you receive theirs.

Some questions you can help you connect to your deepest values and highest purpose are what is your professional mission? What is the one incredibly unique and important thing that you and only you can do, that you were put on this earth to fulfill? Ensure your personal story is woven in. What is the story of yourself that you feel called to tell? What does the fullest self-expression of who you are look like each day? What are 3-5 words to describe you bearing all of this in mind?